AIBU to think Private School isn’t worth the expense?

[Macaronsandcupcakes]

In my area (Bristol) all the private schools I’ve spoken to have admitted they will eventually pass on the 20% VAT (I’m not objecting the govt policy). This means the cheapest school will be charging £7k+ per term. For one child from yr 7 to complete their GCSE’s it’ll be £110k.

I completely understand the schools get better grades, but other than grades why is it worth it? Has your child significantly benefited?

Articles I’ve recently read suggest that the anti private discussions are gaining momentum, both from universities & employees.

My partner is keen to send our children. But I need convincing.

I would go private for secondary. Did this with DS and not regretting it. Teachers are the same but pupils are selected. No bad behaviour tolerated. My neighbour whose DS is in state told me her DS can't concentrate because there are so many children who are being disruptive. Saying swear words to teachers or making noises. How are you supposed to learn in that environment? Teachers are great but they can only do so much...

well, from my experience as a parent and a teacher, engaged parents come from all walks of life.
I don't pay for private healthcare or education and trust me, I value my health, the NHS and education. So do all of the other parents I know.

It depends on what you call bad behaviour. The local private school has a real bullying problem by all accounts. Kids are the same everywhere no matter how much you pay. If you're not getting bullied for having the right Nike pros then you're being bullied because your pony doesn't have the right brand of saddle.

Depends on so many things but now that VAT has been slapped on we've decided that our local junior school is good enough, but would like to send them private for secondary. We'd have gone in year 5 but we are now leaving it until year 7 to make up for the additional VAT expenses.

I work in a role that allows me to visit and see teaching and learning in theses schools, as well as what these school have offer more widely.

What, you work in every indy school in the UK to qualify you to make that statement?

We're looking at secondary schools atm. Every state school we've looked at has had student led tours, as well as students helping their teachers demonstrate science experiments, activities, showing the visiting kids and their parents the equipment in the media labs, art studios etc. They were all keen to chat and have their honest views, good and bad, of different aspects of the school.

OP visit as many schools as you can, ask them critical questions: what's the pass rate; how many students progress onto university and how are they supported if they want to get into a competitive course/university. There a plenty of myths about private schools, e.g. small class size, this only matters if you are in single digits as it is not a money maker for any school.

Ultimately, it doesn't matter which school you go to, it matter whose class you are in and who your parents are.

It's no longer the guarantee it once was. But the chances are still good. I visited Cheltenham Ladies once and their library was the size of our school hall. I remember feeling a twang of something. It wasn't jealousy as such, more of a realisation that these girls just had better chances.

You can take a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

Which ones do you think they are??!

We’re doing the same, sending DD to a private primary with excellent success rates for local grammar. If she gets in then it will have been very worthwhile… quite the gamble though I suppose!

Well actually you can if you use apple juice or recovery mash.....

I went to private school and a top London uni, joined a Consulting grad scheme. On my grad scheme most were grammar or private. However, it's now 20 years on and a large % of sr management and directors at my level at all the top corporates are from state schools, and not Oxbridge educated. I also used to think private school lent itself to confidence but I now believe it's more to do with parents and travel. So I think everything balances out post uni, and again in your 30s when those who pushed hard in their 20s step back/burn out (like me) and those who were a bit lost in their 20s find a purpose in their 30s.

In summary I don't think it's worth it unless you are wealthy and won't feel the pinch of the fees to much. Prob better to save the money for your retirement, their house fund and lots of nice holidays.

The wrong reason would be for your DC to enter a high paid profession. It's just not guaranteed.

DF spent £70k on my education (scholarship) and I work for a charity. I gained a lot from it though - independent thinking, love of learning, friends, values, enjoyment of sport, maturity, tolerance.

This is so true, and as someone else said not all private schools are equal. And not all private schools will suit all children, some will definitely be worse than state.

Personally I think going private just to get better exam results is a waste of money. You could buy personal tuition in a few subjects and achieve that extra grade or two. But then my children didnt want to be ie Drs so didnt need all round excellent results.

Bristol area has a huge range of Private Schools that are very varied, choose carefully.

Privates schools are like the Emperor's New Clothes! Less time in lessons (looooong holidays) and unqualified teachers. Just because someone has a phd in a subject REALLY doesn't equate to being able to teach it ...

Don't believe the myth of better behaviour at private schools either - the kids just have access to more money so the parties are fuelled by champagne and class A drugs rather than cider and vapes 😬

The likes of Westminster and both the St Paul’s. This is not to say other private or state schools are crap. But families need to think about the values, culture and practicalities of what they want out of the school they choose.

Have you any experience of private schools outside of their representation in films and on tv…?

So you’ve been to every independent school in the country and know for sure that only 5 of them are of benefit to their students, over and above what could be offered in a state school.
To know whether a private school
is worth it to an individual child you would need to know what the alternative is for that child. You’re talking absolute bollocks.

Less time in lessons (looooong holidays) and unqualified teachers.

Bingo!
Still no mention of Boris though.

bifurCAT · Today 21:27
You can take a horse to water, but you can't make him drink

You can send a person to college but you cannot make them think.

Do tell. I’ve got friends that are planning to send their children to BGS.

OP I have to hand it to you, this is a fantastic subversion! 🫡

Rock up in a vehemently pro-VAT space (because it's not fair that the poors can't access the advantages of private schools) and get them to sound off on how private schools aren't worth the money and are in some cases worse!

Look, if you've got circa £250k to send your kids to private school then I'm guessing you've got the money to buy a house in one of the areas that would get you into a good state school in Bristol.
Purely on results (going on what DC's peers achieve in said state schools) I don't know why you'd pay.
On the other hand through my sport I'm linked in with many private school kids (and parents). They undoubtedly get far more opportunities for their sports (training, matches etc) and extra curriculum stuff is on tap and we'll supported. Mostly parents seem to be paying for an extended school day/wrap around care and the school taking care of promoting and supporting hobbies and when experiences. State parents have to do much more driving about and supporting....