Details that made a wedding

[Gopin]

Please can I ask what details at a wedding you have really liked? Big or small.

I remember going to a wedding as a child which had a treasure hunt set up for the kids in the reception hall. And the prize was the unveiling of a treat table. As a kid it was amazing.

Im getting married next year and just thinking about those nice thoughtful touches.

We have made sure there is no waiting around and PLENTY of food.

any input would be much appreciated

I would hate this, I’d go to the toilet and hide till it was over. Honestly it would ruin the day for me.

me too

Id wonder if i’d accidentally wandered in to a children’s party

thankfully never ever appeared in any of the weddings (all of which i have hugely enjoyed) i have attended

Here’s what I hate:
waitibg for food after speeches
rubbish food
food too late/not enough
WHEN YOURE SPLIT UP FROM YOUR PARTNER IN THE SEATING PLAN.

I really don't like your tone, it's incredibly rude of you to call me bad mannered, despite your faux gracious 'agree to disagree' bs. It's standard in modern weddings to have speeches before dinner, I haven't been to one wedding with speeches after the meal. Not that I have to defend myself, but none of my guests had travelled further than 20 minutes, and 'sat through the ceremony'..?! That's why they're there!

I love the speeches but it’s never fun when you’re starving!

I know what else I hate! Wanky gift list. Some of them are so fucking cheeky. There are two that have stood out to me as ridiculously expensive. One I was ok with as I knew this couple would appreciate the stuff and keep it forever (even if I would never spend that kind of money eg £100 for two hand towels). The other couple had so much weird stuff on there which they’d obviously gone “ooh looks fun!” And clicked it as add ons to their list. Weird tables, paintings, a guitar (!) honestly.

i love the speeches

ours was in between main and dessert. Perfect.

Not before!!

Let friends sit together for the meal, particularly if they don't get to see each other that often. There's nothing worse than finding you're stuck next to people you don't know and having to make small talk for 3 hours. The only time it is acceptable to put me next to a stranger is when that stranger is Henry Cavill. Then I will be persuaded.

You can dislike it all you want 😂 no need to try and tell me off like a naughty child. It’s certainly not standard in modern weddings in my circle! Clearly everyone does things differently but I am giving my opinion, which is that it’s good manners to prioritise the guests’ comfort and ensure they’ve been well fed/watered etc. before they sit through the speeches. For most people unless they’re immediate family or bridal party the speeches are not the most fun part of the day.

And yes, hard as it may be to believe, most people are not hanging on the bride and groom’s every word during the ceremony, it’s a nice (hopefully quick) thing people sit through and then crack on with the main celebrations.

I’ve never been to a wedding where this was done but sounds like a good idea

Free bar, no evening do. No first dances, no speeches, ditch all the boring stuff. Wedding about 2pm, lunch at 3pm then a disco till 8 or 9pm. Go home. Perfect.

This is what I mean. You’re there to have a good time. Not feel awkward. You will still talk to people around you if you’re having a good time.

Just for the kids?! 🤣

I can’t believe posters are actually getting offended by this 😂 how mumsnet.

I thought speeches were always at the end - over coffee

Ideally no more than three, no more than 5 mins each

I've always seen the speeches half way through the meal lol.
Definitely not before, that would be excruciating. And probably not after, as many would be leaving.

After the mains, when it starts to make sense serving bubbly and just before the cake is what I've often seen.

The one I’ve been to recently:

Good things -
beautiful setting
different rooms so you can mingle, relax or be up and about
quick canapés and loads of veggie ones
drinks waiting for you as soon as you entered the reception area (including non alcoholic), remember people don’t normally bring their trusty water bottles which they are used to.

Less good:
The food was incredibly late and incredibly slow. It really wasn’t that good.
The speeches were before the food and everyone had to listen to them STANDING! (They were done in a different room whilst the dining room was being set up).
Partners were mixed up and friends on different tables.

Honestly though, I love the couple. That was everything.

When people say no photographs or no waiting around for photographs, do they mean no drinks reception ? So straight from ceremony to meal?

Every wedding I’ve been to, have had a drinks reception with canapés while the B&G and families have done photos. I don’t see a problem with this?!

I went tò a wedding years ago and their entertainment was an oompah band.
At first i thought oh no but have to say its was the most entertaining wedding do I have ever been to
Bride and groom nailed that one for all the guests to have a fabulous time .

Wedding favours are always a bjt of a waste of money and generic. We had personalised fans for ours as we got married abroad but I like the idea of a photo of the bride/groom with each guest placed on their setting. I've also seen people write poems which is a lovely idea.

Magicians are a bit old hat and not everyone's cup of tea. Ditto with photo booths. I've seen people have an illustrator which I think is a cool idea.

Disposable cameras on the tables for some good candid shots. I also think it's nice to have photos of the bride and groom over the years somewhere, nice to have a look at and for people to reminisce and have a laugh at old pics.

I did party bags for the kids which kept them entertained - novelty glasses (made for some cute photos), stickers, bubbles etc. if you want to go extra, I've seen bubble houses at weddings and they look really cool.

The bigger stuff- free bar, good timings and make sure that guests won't congregate and stay in the bar area all night as this can divide the party and ruin the atmosphere

In the "dead zone" between the sit down meal and the evening disco they had a casino. Their table favours were casino chips which you all used to bet with (no actual money) then you exchanged chips for daft prizes.
It went down very well.

Also, same wedding they constantly circulated with little nibbly bits of food so nobody went hungry.

Please explain!

Doing a “last dance” in addition to the first dance. Brought everyone onto the dance floor a minute or two into the song and it really wrapped up the night nicely!

I totally agree with this. As long as the guests are fed and watered, and are not cold or too hot, then they will be fine.

No-one notices matchy matchy chair covers. No-one wants wedding favours or other unnecessary fripperies.

We once left a winter wedding early because the venue was so cold.

Minimal waiting about

Plenty of good food and drink

Plenty of places to sit and making sure they’re out of the weather (got a terrible and unexpected sunburn at a wedding a few years ago!)

Opportunity to get to know other guests, so not segregating people into their own groups too much

Sounds like a no brainer, but plenty of freely available cold water and tea and coffee for the entire event! It’s amazing how difficult it is to get those once the dancing starts!

Somewhere to sit away from loud music for those that don’t like it or if you need a break.