To think that workplaces should be less accommodating of personal lives?

[HangryDenimBird]

I’ve noticed workplaces bending over backwards to accommodate personal lives. AIBU to think that employees should keep their personal issues separate from work?

Some shocking managers / wanna be managers on here.

Staff who feel appreciated and treated with humanity are more productive and more loyal - a much better business model than the 80s throwbacks.

Have we had ‘my husband the CEO says’ yet - they always pop up on these threads and always have zero understanding of the modern workplace, very little work history and a thirst for punishing working people that’s clearly the only way they can feel important in the world.

Hard to say a definite yes or no without any context or specific examples, what do you mean by people’s personal lives? Do you mean recognising that someone going through a divorce or bereavement or similar hard time might not be able to give 100% to work or do you mean letting someone whose hobby is live music leave early every other Friday because they want to go to a gig?

People aren’t robots and you can’t expect people to leave every aspect of their personal lives at the door, if you’re going through a tough time it’s not always emotionally possible to put that aside during work hours 100% of the time. If you have dependants such as children or elderly parents you can’t always guarantee something which means they need you won’t come up during working hours. If you have health issues you can’t guarantee you won’t have a flare up on a work day or that you won’t have a doctor or hospital appointment which can only be attended in working hours. Obviously people should be professional at work and some aspects of people’s personal lives don’t need to be discussed or considered, but there are some bigger things which will inevitably be hard for people to leave at home sometimes.

I absolutely agree. And it's so often to the detriment of other staff. Oh so and so always needs this that and the other because she has 5 children and her DH can't take time off from his oh so important job. So you will need to cover. Fo.

Your home life is a matter for your employer if it is affecting your work. Caring responsibilities for example.

Kemi is that you? Less accommodating work places will have a disproportionately negative impact on women so we should offer as much flexibility as we can.

Thank God my manager did not think like you after I was the victim of a serious sexual assault.

I said "childcare". I meant "after school childcare" mid afternoon. I know you can't really work and supervise a young child and I wouldn't recommend trying.

The team I work with reasonable adjustments’ are met with a sense of entitlement to the extent that in order to schedule work I have to take account of who is doing which school run.

Sure, as long as the employer doesn’t expect the employee to be flexible with work either 🤷‍♀️ my job would be literally impossible without me being prepared to make some adjustments to my working hours, they’d have to employ two people and have one cover out of hours I suppose.

This. Totally this.

It's great that my employer allows us to work flexibly and is happy for parents to do school runs during working hours etc. It's not great that that impacts on people who don't do school runs (or anything else) during working hours and are therefore picking up more of the slack in external (client) meetings that take place during those hours.

Employers who have happy and content employees generally get more work completed and pay out less in sickness and settlements etc. There is a balance but if you accommodate personal life in the sense of flexibility and trust etc, it is normal for employers to be rewarded by their employees for doing so.

Hi Kemi! 👋🏻

Taking a break from the leadership contest shenanigans?

Unhappy employees who do not feel respected and cared about are not productive. They also leave as soon as they find a better employer, and an employer like that will be left only with employees who can't find work elsewhere rather than the top talent you want to be attracting to a business.

I would rather have happy, engaged employees who feel confident to share when something is going on in their personal lives which might impact their work, and know that I will do what I can to be flexible for them, than miserable employees who know I see them just as a resource to use and abuse.

Some of you are absolutely clueless I swear.

Some facts for you:

We have an aging population which means more working age people than ever are having to care for sick and elderly parents.

Should they just be left alone to die in a care home?

We have one of the most expensive childcare systems in the world meaning that parents often need to be able to work flexibly to minimise the amount of childcare they need to pay for.

Or should all women exit the workplace to care for babies a la 1950?

1 in 2 of us will get cancer in our lifetime meaning many of the working age population either has cancer or is caring for a spouse or family member with it.

I suppose that’s their own fault eh?

7million people are on an NHS waiting list. Many of them are working age. This means that we have a very sick population that are not being treated quickly enough for their health conditions and are, as a result, getting sicker.

I guess they should have been smart enough to save up and get private healthcare?

These are the realities of the world and whether employers like it or not they are their problems. They are the problems of the working age population and employers have no choice but to adapt to them because who else is going to work for them?

We try to manage out managers who think like this.

Just saying.
Employee wellbeing is a thing.

I am a very good employee. I have a niche set of skills. I have also disabled children and can only work as my employer is very supportive and accomodating. Should people like me not be able to work a living and should companies lose good staff because some idiots think it's too accommodating to have a good amount of flexibility? you seriously need to get your head examined, op

When I was working in a managerial role, I did all I could to accommodate my team and support them with genuine issues and emergencies. Life happens to all of us. Obviously there were boundaries, but people who know that they can be honest when they need support tend to make far happier, more motivated and loyal employees. It’s a win win as far as I’m concerned. And people matter.
Hope you aren’t a manager OP.

Nobody exists in a vacuum, you can't separate the two out entirely. People are constantly 'flexible' at home, dealing with work stresses, those times when you have to work late/start early, do that extra thing, etc. Surely the psychological contact means work needs to be flexible, too?

Best manager and the one I went above and beyond for was great at work life balance. He was very tolerant when I was pregnant and puked every day / sending me home most days. But when I wasn’t pregnant I worked so damn hard for him, more than any manager I have ever had. I stayed late, went the extra mile as I knew he would have my back.

How right you are! Part of the reason I went freelance. I am a woman, but I got tired of 'picking up' in the team spirit after other mums. Can I leave early today - Toby has a concert? Oh, Mary is ill, I am not coming in for a few days. Work never had to stop, we had to pick up after 'independent hard working women'. My 'tobies' also had concerts, and my 'maries also went ill', but that is why my dh and I decided for him to go part-time in a low paid job, so I would concentrate and work like a horse and not bother others with my 'personal life', which is, incidentally, of no interest to anyone.

There are boundaries, but supporting staff is reasonable, it's up the employer to mitigate the effects on other people. I used to manage someone who left an abusive marriage with her children, she was then the only one who could take time off when her children were poorly etc; but she was a brilliant employee- really lovely to work with, supportive of the rest of the team, knowledgeable and very capable. Supporting her with some additional days off was a small price to pay for what we got in return. Plus, it's the decent thing to do. Sure boundaries are important and some people take the piss, but there are benefits morally and from a business perspective in being a flexible employer.

I worked somewhere like this when I was younger. The whole place was a disaster. Labour turnover was sky-high, and there were very few experienced team members. No one stuck around long, because management expected them to place work above all else.

It was well known by competitors in the area. I was directly headhunted by another manager, and pretty much her first ‘selling point’ was ‘obviously there’s flexibility with days off and things’.

And this is why so many employers are complaining they can’t recruit, can’t retain, can’t performance manage, can’t deliver and productivity is low.

The UK has a huge issue with productivity just not matching the hours people are in the workplace.

You can pay someone to work to the letter of their employment contract but it’s very difficult as an employer to buy commitment, focus, collaboration, flexibility etc.

People are people, not machines. It’s your job as an employing manager to work out how to get the best out of people. Alternatively enjoy being mired in grievances, tribunals, PIPs etc. All of which is hugely time consuming.

If everyone in our dept decided tomorrow to only work their contracted hours and days, the whole place would fall apart. An enormous amount of productivity relies on goodwill and flexibility on both sides.

if in having issues in my personal life and struggling in some way that has direct impact on my work performance.