Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

not to agree with a friend when i think shes wrong? sorry a bit long!

60 replies

somebodyhelpme · 21/04/2008 18:58

ok I have a friend that I think may never speak to me again, as I told her I thought she was being irisponsable (sp?). Right this friend phoned me yesterday, asking if I knew anyone with any kittens, as she wanted one, an aquaintance of mine has some, so I said i'd give her a ring and find out. The aquaintance said yes she had one, which would be ready tuesday, friend said could she pick it up yesterday, which she did. I had a text earlier saying did I know of anyone that would like a kitten as she has changed her mind and now doesnt want it, as it had an accident last nite,(poor thing didnt know where the litter tray was), it kept her awake meowing and wont sit on her knee. I said she needed to give it a couple of days to settle in, she said she would put it in the shed if she had to listen to it tonite. I said I thought she was being irasponsable, and that she shouldnt have got it. Next thing I know shes saying she doesnt want to see me anymore as I dont understand her. am I being unreasonable to tell her what I thought? I thought honesty was the best policy!

OP posts:

themoon66 · 21/04/2008 19:00

Poor little baby.. being shut in a shed for crying out in the night

No, you are not being unreasonable.

MeMySonAndI · 21/04/2008 19:01

If you keep making noises she will put you in the shed too!

Twiglett · 21/04/2008 19:02

she's an idiot isn't she?

I assume she's childless / partnerless .. maybe she's scared of becoming the cat lady?

constancereader · 21/04/2008 19:02

yanbu, poor kitten.
she sounds like a silly cow tbh.

itsahardknocklife · 21/04/2008 19:04

aw I'll have the kitten!

DANCESwithLordPottingtonSmythe · 21/04/2008 19:05

YANBU She sounds very immature. What did she expect from a baby animal who has just been removed from it's mother It's probably distressed and scared witless.

Original poster

somebodyhelpme · 21/04/2008 19:05

no she has a child, she says shes worried about germs, and has an illness that means she needs to sleep, but I dont know why she has decided not to see me anymore

OP posts:

poppy34 · 21/04/2008 19:07

yanbu - wtf did she think a baby animal would behave like? And honesty was the best policy.

where is the kitten now?

constancereader · 21/04/2008 19:07

She might be cross with you because you were in the right and she was being stupid. Nothing is so irritating to some people as being clearly in the wrong.

MadameCh0let · 21/04/2008 19:07

The reason she doesn't want to see you again is because she can't FACE you. She can't face you because you know how immature she's been over this. WE've all been told over and over again that an animal is not just for christmas.

She has just completely changed her mind, and rightly so, that is bloody embarrassing for her. The fekking eejit. the Poor cat.

umberella · 21/04/2008 19:07

what a f***ng knob.

sorry - yanbu.

I f***ng hate people like that, they make my blood boil.

2point4kids · 21/04/2008 19:08

sounds like the poor kitten would be better off somewhere else

SmugColditz · 21/04/2008 19:10

She's being selfish. I know someone like this. Don't worry about what she says about not seeing you again, she's too self centred to remember.

Original poster

somebodyhelpme · 21/04/2008 19:10

well i'm hoping that the lady she got it from will take it back, i would have had it but we already have a kitten, and i wouldnt take on another, just feel abit crap that she would fall out with me over this

OP posts:

MeMySonAndI · 21/04/2008 19:10

I insist, because she doesn't know that in order to get good things you have to pass for some bad ones too (like having a meowing kitten or a friend that disagrees with you)

I would offer to pick up the kitten and to return it to the previous owner. I once found one of the puppies of my dog wandering in the street (blocks away from its new house), I rang the new owner who had not yet realised it was missing, who said she will collect it in the afternoon and only did 2 weeks later. I wuld have rather rehomed that puppy than seeing her go to such idiots but... as they were friends of my parents... (still fuming about it)

ladymariner · 21/04/2008 19:13

yanbu, she's extremely irresponsible, and also bloody cruel, poor little kitten. It would definately be better off away from her

Original poster

somebodyhelpme · 21/04/2008 19:16

in her defence, she does have lots of probs at the moment, but I did try to tell her it wasnt a good idea. just feel really sad, that our friendship means so little

OP posts:

Katie3677 · 21/04/2008 19:17

It sounds to me like there is more to this. YANBU at all, but think your friend may have some issues that you are not aware of, it's just not normal behaviour is it?

Original poster

somebodyhelpme · 21/04/2008 19:19

oh I know all her issues, and I feel for her and let alot of things go, this is the first time i've stood up and disagreed with her, and now i've lost her, just wish i'd kept my mouth shut, and found a new home for the kitten.

OP posts:

hecate · 21/04/2008 19:37

Yes, she can't stand the fact that you were right .

She doesn't sound like much of a friend - this is the first time you've 'stood up to her' - do you mean you normally let her walk over you? You disagree with her and she cuts you out of her life?

Seriously - not a friend to you!! you've lost nothing.

scottishmum007 · 21/04/2008 19:45

She has no respect for any animals thats obvious enough. She's a friend you can do without. just move on. I don't like cats myself, but I certainly would not behave like that. i hate cruelty to any animal!!

scottishmum007 · 21/04/2008 19:46

if she has kids and she doesn't like them crying does she just stick them in the garden shed aswell??

mamablue · 21/04/2008 19:47

What did she think a kitten would be like? Sounds as if she did not think it through properly. I know a mum at school who let her dd have a puppy on whim. Decided to get one on Friday by Sunday had picked up an expensive pedigree puppy. By Tuesday had given it away as it had pooed on her new carpet and she did not like the mess! argggggghhhh!!

If she says she does not want to talk to you again just because you have disagreed with her you have to ask how good a friend she is.

piratecat · 21/04/2008 19:47

I'll have the little kitten, if i am anywhere near you.

Devon, so prob not??

This friend sounds unsteady, and this kitten is the last thing she needs to be having. Go get it and take it back.

NotABanana · 21/04/2008 19:48

I understan what you are feeling. I lost a good friend as I said something to her that she took the wrong way. Part of me thinks I wish I had kept quiet but at least I know what she is like.

I'll have the kitten.

Flip

1 2 3