To feel slightly suspicious of dp

[wwyt]

Hi, I'm looking to know would YOU be suspicious? I'm not really suspicious but maybe a bit slightly?

So, dp works for his dads business and has for the last 10 years. Dp doesn't start work until 9. Usually he would set an alarm for 8:30 which sounds really late but his workplace is a 2 minute drive from our home. And he's really easy going 🤣. His dad doesn't drive but a workmate would always collect him.

About a month ago dp started setting alarms at 6.45-7:15 getting up and leaving the house within 10 mins of those alarms. (Extremely early from before) I've been with dp 5 years he's never up that early for work.

He says it's because he's starting to give his dad a lift to work every morning. His mum and dad live a 5 minute drive from our home. That's not too suspicious. But the thing that's making me go 🤨 is he's leaving home in the mornings in his normal clothes. He says he gets ready in his parents house just before he leaves for work as it's easier?

He has a specific work uniform. He would always get ready here before leaving.

So he's started leaving the house over an hour earlier than usual and not getting ready here?

Would you be suspicious?

I actually speak from experience when I say confront him ,you can see when they are lying ...I did and the reaction is very telling .I guess it depends on your way of handling things Ive always been upfront about stuff and expect my partner to be the same

I understand wanting to be upfront, it’s the way I’d rather be able to handle things but while I respect you expecting your partner to also be upfront, if he was, then he wouldn’t be having an affair? I’d worry I wouldn’t just be able to tell from his reaction and all I’m doing is giving him a chance to be more careful and hide his affair better. If it works though then maybe op should try it and see how it goes, it’s better than living in limbo!

I would be very calm and pretend I knew everything. Then look him straight in the eyes and tell him that you have heard things and you won't to hear his side. Something dodgy is going on that's for sure.

Weird

And if he responds with wtf you on about, knowing everything , know what? Then what? What’s she going to say?

Honestly I can’t be bothered to reply and explain but I get it now. Cheers. Have a lovely Sunday 😘
ps MN deleted them not me.🙄

Yes, I did and yes he admitted it, came up with all sorts of excuses as to why but did admit it. My phone was broken and I borrowed my ex's phone to let my mum know. Later I went to check if mum had replied and further down his messages was one saying 'do you want me to cook tonight?' I thought that was weird so I replied to it as if it was him and she responded very confused. At that point I knew but had no clear evidence, just 2 texts that could have been innocent. I checked his phone bill (back in the days when you got paper bills) and found hundreds of messages/calls had been made to the same number. I confronted him and he dissolved into tears 🙄 You do need a certain amount of evidence to ask the question but there does come a point where you just have to confront him 😒

I’m sorry you went through that. I can see that with evidence most people would admit it. I was just worried as op says he laughs at her and calls her crazy about stuff so if she confronts him and he is cheating he’ll just lie and hide stuff better but maybe now she has a little evidence that he was at his parents house until 10am he could break down and admit it like your ex did.

I know.
Because someone reported them.
MNHQ only know about such posts if someone reports them.
The site is not pre-moderated.

Yep. Most regular users figure out pretty quickly you can't delete your own posts!

Doesn't even need to be evidence, I asked on the first one, well he couldn;t cheat on that one because something happened but the intention was there and DP denied it, then admitted it. Serial cheater, it got so bad he just used to tell me without being prompted.

Jesus.

Op hasn't posted since yesterday morning in page 3, it's now on page 6...

And it's all inane bollocks and people trying to score meaningless internet points against each other to make themselves feel superior.

If OP is a troll, well done .. you've played right into their hands, got people deleted and frothed the thread into a derailed oblivion.
Slow clap...

😂ahhh how the tables have turned @TheShellBeach

I missed that. What did they say?

I’ve asked for all of my posts to be deleted and they have been. Apologies for derailing this thread.

Thanks KaleQueen, this pile on was getting ridiculous.

Think you might have cracked it

Hope OP is ok

Doubt very much the OP hasn't returned because someone suggested her story didn't quite hang together. There could be other explanations.

Oh no, hope you get some answers

This must be very stressful I’m so sorry.

Maybe you need to ask him directly why his car is outside his parents if he’s supposed to have driven his Dad to work. Say you happened to see it on your way out or something. Are you able to drop in to his work saying you were just out with the baby or something and wanted to say Hi! - you need to catch him out so he doesn’t fob you off or gaslight you.

good luck xx

best way is to start to arrange polite gestures, send flowers to the work place, have a note in the car about how much you love him somewhere in the passenger side, maybe in the glove box maybe everywhere but hidden, at some point the truth comes out either by the other person seeing them or through guilt. Love can be the eye opener as strange as that may sound.

and this, very good point, anything unexpected but just in your mind hope for the best and you're wrong and only reacting like this because you care about yourself and the relationship, do not go with bad intentions that may give him an excuse that you are... fill in the blanks bad person

shouting, screaming, accusing

Long shot, but could you call him exactly before working hours and tell him you need him to come home for [whatever?]. Since he works with his father, it shouldn't be a problem if he's late.