Neighbour kicked my door down/broke in

[Sparklfairy]

AIBU to expect the police to arrest/remove him...?

I live alone in a flat in a block of 4. I have met this neighbour just once, and introduced myself. A few weeks ago he knocked on my door, not threateningly, but persistently - consistent knocking for 3-4 minutes... at 1.30am. I was awake as I WFH but nights, and just ignored it.

He went away, and there's been nothing since. Until yesterday at 6-something in the morning. Again, I was working but the flat was in total silence. No tv or any noise that would disturb him, I was literally just sitting on my bed.

Suddenly I heard a bang and froze. I was confused and didn't know what it was and was trying to work out where it was coming from. 3 or 4 further bangs and my front door burst open and he was stood there, swaying, glassy eyed.

I screamed. It's a studio, tiny flat, like one of those micro flats that you see advertised but yes, this is my life and I had no escape, no room to hide in, not even a bathroom with a lock on the door (as there is no lock, and the bathroom is opposite the front door).

I screamed at him, he said I was 'in' his head, fucking with his head (when I've done absolutely nothing), and when he tried to step towards me I screamed again and he suddenly 'clicked', became lucid and said ok and left. I was shaking.

My other neighbour (upstairs, but next door to him), texted me saying he heard screaming, and let me take refuge in his flat. Before I did, I obviously called 999. The police seemed non committal, that someone would come out at some point. 36 hours later I've had no visit.

But here is the kicker. When hiding in my neighbours flat, my friend/neighbour had the bright idea of just knocking on his door and talking to crazy tenant. He has recorded the conversation where crazy tenant admits I did nothing wrong but I just 'remind him' of someone and that's why he broke my door down

I rang 101 with the crime ref to update. The lady was so helpful and checked with her supervisor as she was astonished no one had come out to me yet. She reassured me that someone would attend and it had been miscategorised/recategorised now.

It's now nearly 9pm on Sunday and STILL nothing. I can't go home. The lock has been 'fixed' but obviously Crazy Tenant has proven that he can break it whenever he likes. I live alone. I have stressed every single detail which should have escalated this, but nothing is being done. I have chased with the letting agent but basically they're saying I have to wait until Monday for any action to be done. And even then, they were non committal as to WHAT would happen.

So I'm stuck, and cannot go home, and my rent is due today. I have no idea what to do.

I think this is something your MP should know - email them and mark it as urgent casework. They will have regular contact with the local police and should be able to chase up

yes - it locks from the outside with a key, but on the inside with the thumb lock.

Like everyone else I just wanted to reach out to you. You're not doing anything wrong. This is not on you. I really hope that people are taking you seriously. If you are able to move. I would. He sounds deeply unstable. Good luck.

The thing i worry about those is if what if you need an ambulance and you cant get to the door to let them in?
Its going to be hard to batter down the door.

They’re all supposed to have had new training on this sort of stuff, so much for looking after women in danger! Totally disgusting treatment, go to the police station and don’t leave until they do something

I'm so sorry OP, that sounds bloody terrifying! I really hope you can get something done about that unhinged neighbour.

You need to make a complaint to police, and you need to make a complaint to your landlord. Then if it were me I'd possibly consider a move

why did you feel the need to quote the entire opening post, and with a comment that's a repeat of several hundred posts that have already been made on the thread?

I’m sorry this happened to you, but yabu. The police de-escalated because by the time you called them the man had left so in their eyes it’s no longer an emergency. If he was still there and refusing to leave they would’ve responded immediately. You then left the property without informing them where you were going and when they called (likely from outside of your property) you refused to give your location so they couldn’t immediately come to you. You made it difficult for them to respond and police have a lot to deal with these days they’re essentially doing social work, mental health, youth work…. On top of their actual jobs because there just isn’t enough resources out there. I understand this was extremely traumatic and I hope they can resolve this so you can feel safe in your home but you need to cooperate with them.

Have you the energy after all this to call the Kent Messenger/ Evening Post news desk and give them the story? They will probably run the story and that publicity may well get the police and/or your landlord shifting.

Great idea but willing to bet the farm this ain’t going to happen.

Edited to delete due to OP's responses being BU / only accepting advice that with fits their point of view.

They shouldn't be writing stories about allegations that haven't even been investigated by police. For one thing they could be sued for defamation as they only have one person's word for it and for another if newspapers publish stories about potential open police investigations they risk prejudicing the investigation. This is a total non starter.

Hope you're having a more restful and less stressed evening this evening @Sparklfairy

I am not saying what the police did was right but I genuinely don’t think the public realises how over stretched they are. I’m not a police officer but have a lot of dealings through work. Unfortunately they have to prioritise as there simply isn’t enough officers to go round. So if the neighbour had left then in their eyes you not in imminent danger but the woman on the other line whose husband has a knife and is trying to stab her is or the person with intruders in their house is and therefore these have to be prioritised. It’s awful that this is the case but this is what the reality is. I think and I hope that had you rang whilst he was still in the property then the response would have been very different. No one wants to do this job anymore. They are not valued by the public and for the abuse and violence they have to put up with on a daily basis they are simply not paid enough. The government need to step up because both police officers and staff are leaving in high numbers. There is no incentive to stay anymore. The government don’t want to pay for more officers or staff so police have to make judgement calls and they aren’t always the correct ones but again it’s the police that get the blame. Never the people that cut their numbers. As for why are they so worried about covering there own arses because they have to. Policing is now 90% paperwork. Added to the fact there aren’t enough numbers of officers the system is bound to fail but it is very unlikely it will just be because someone couldn’t be bothered it’s more likely that they simply didn’t have the resources. If people realised the sheer amount of violent crimes police attend on a daily basis they would be shocked as I don’t think unless you work either with the police or alongside them you truly realise the amount of things they deal with that the public just don’t hear about

How can they publicise anything when they can't possibly name anyone involved for fear of getting sued? They couldn't name the OP, the neighbour, the landlord or where it happened!

That's completely ridiculous, regardless of how you feel they have acted your safety is not at risk from them!

Appalling!
Hoping you get speedy resolution x

This is horrendous, I am so sorry OP.

can you visit your local Police Station and talk directly to someone? Chase your local Police Commissioner and maybe local mental health department in your local hospital?

Absolutely horrific.

OP, how did it go with the police today?

I don’t think OP is coming back.

sorry this has happened to you.

Something similar happened to me and it took over 3 weeks for the police to respond. During this time I genuinely felt myself and my baby were in extreme danger.

It turned out the police in my city had a problem with the computer log system, so the lost hundreds of reported crimes.

I was quite shocked because its the only time I’ve ever needed police assistance and couldn’t believe they weren’t there for me.

Do everything you’ve got to do to keep yourself safe, and keep contacting the police and local mps until someone takes it seriously

Thats terrible @Fruby - it is just unacceptable that DA is still being treated so poorly. Jess Philips was just talking about Raneems law the other day - after the poor woman and her mother were killed by her abusive ex, but she had called the police 4 time that day concerned about her safety, one time of which he was in the house I think. The police were found to have materially contributed to her death. When I worked in a womens shelter, 30 years ago, they always reminded us that statistically at least 20% of the male officers responding to calls about DA were abusers themselves.

no door (unless perhaps a 24 inch thick metal door at Fort Knox) is impregnable (however a tank would manage it), so properly equipped police could get through a door equipped with a London Bar. but another layer of defence to a woman on her own.

i found this thread shocking & upsetting. apparently random (and i bet unvetted) males being housed within the private secure spaces of a woman living on her own.

i found this thread shocking & upsetting. apparently random (and i bet unvetted) males being housed within the private secure spaces of a woman living on her own.

I get that it's upsetting, but this isn't happening. The OP is renting a flat in a block of flats. There are no circumstances in which another flat in the same building could be considered her private secure space.