To feel a bit embarrassed my nearly four year old is in a class with two year olds!

[notaswimmer]

I know I shouldn’t but …

We have been going swimming since ds was a baby. The final class before they are able to swim independently is aged from two to starting school.

DS can’t yet swim independently, not even a little bit. So he’s still in that class - but all the other children are aged two. Now we’ve gone back after summer the difference is quite marked.

its my issue I know

Just a note of comfort - I was you, 20 years ago, stuck in the 'baby' swimming class with my ever-older child. Now she swims like a porpoise, always seeking out a local pool wherever she goes, and was swimming in the sea the last couple of days. She even does triathlons and iron man triathlons. She was very slow to walk, too, but she ended up doing gymnastics competitively for some time. They all take their own time to develop, but in the end it often evens out.

Per term probably? We pay quite a bit more than that for 2:1 at a private pool because keen to get the 3YO swimming and they’re the only ones that will teach him properly without me getting in! We’ll swap to the council pool when he’s 4 though as the earliest their lessons start from.

Is this a private pool?

No, that’s what a swim session of two hours costs at our (admittedly very nice) leisure centre pool. DS’s lessons are at a private pool though and they cost £62 a month.

Find a different class. My child swam in the first lesson with a different swim school. Some instructors/ schools are just not that good/ don’t suit your child.

You don’t say how big your child is? My daughter was very thin at that age and we were advised to wait a while til she had put weight on as she was basically not buoyant enough to learn to swim. Once she was big enough we tried again and she got it in no time.
do you have a Better leisure centre near you? Their swim programme is quite good and their normal swimming seems much cheaper than what you are looking at.

My dgc struggled with getting his legs up enough to swim.
My nieces who are brilliant swimmers, put the armbands on his legs and he was swimming almost independently within a fortnight.

Swimming is one of those things where they do seem to get stuck at certain stages then leap. This happens at different ages depending on the child. He's still only 3 - very few 3 year olds can swim (though you'll get plenty on here saying theirs were swimming lengths im sure). It takes a certain level of strength and coordination that takes time

In all honesty, I would look for a different swim school - some are better than others, and yours is maybe just one of the less good ones.

After almost 4 years, I would expect a child to be able to swim independently, even if not very well. Absolutely, this doesn't mean there is something 'wrong' with your son, just that perhaps this swim school isn't great.

My son started lessons at 3 at the local pool. 18 months later, although he could sort of swim independently, he wasn't progressing at all and there was no recognised stroke.

I moved him to a private swim school and the progress in the first half hour lesson was astonishing! He's 10 now, has his gold award and is a club swimmer. He never would have made it that far with the local pool.

I admit the swim school I chose wasn't cheap but it was worth it.

I'd look around for alternatives.

Ah OP… try not to care. My eldest was on a bike at 4, but couldn’t swim until he was 8.
My younger two couldn’t ride without training wheels until 8/9, both were swimming at 5.
Swings and roundabouts.
They get there when they get there and once they do, everyone is pretty much on the same level.

All 3 of my kids are keen cyclists and excellent swimmers.
Your DS won’t even remember being with the 2 year olds!
The most important thing is that you’re happy with the quality of the lessons and the price..

Don't worry too much about it. Learning to swim is the important thing!

My son didn't get to start swimming lessons until he was 9 and he was put in a class with 3 and 4 year olds. It was the right 'skill level ' for him though and I think he actually quite liked being with the much younger group. I felt bad for a few weeks I'll admit, but he wasn't worried in the least.

He's an adult now, and he was in his schools swim team at secondary school and is a very strong swimmer.

Thanks for this. I think it’s because child after child from the original group has progressed and we’re still stuck!

I will have a look at alternatives although there might be quite a long waiting list.

That's insanely expensive 😳

We had this. Then we rented a holiday place i France one summer with a swimming pool. Three days and they had their water legs. Turns out it was more about confidence and having fun.

This was my dc
I then changed swim school
Turns out my dd is just shit at swimming 😂 We go three times a week... She can swim relatively independently now but is significantly worse than her peers and in at least one stage below.
It does feel embarrassing for me, which isn't very fair on my child.

I couldnt swim until i was 13. Not everyone can get on with it or the technique right. I still hate having my face in water now. Let the little one go at his own pace.

We found private lessons seemed to be about water confidence so we switched to council ones and my DS learned to swim there. It was notable that my youngest didn't do any private classes and went straight to council at 5 or 6 and learned in the same time as my oldest once we switched him (after going to private ones since being tiny)

Does he pay attention?
One of my children learnt to swim, but then would not move up from level 2... He was very easily distracted and wouldn't be paying attention to the teacher. After a year of no improvement I moved him to private 1:1 lessons and he then progressed super fast and enjoyed it more.

I'd be shopping around for another pool or complaining to my MP.

Out local pool in a very expensive part of the country costs £22 for a family of four to swim. And if you do swim lessons at the pool you can swim for free as often as you like.

My son's swim teacher said she could tell which children swam in between lessons and which didn't

My little boy is 3 and in the same position- for us it’s convenient him going at the same time as his little sister and it’s the first class of the day. He’s not really interested in swimming but loves being in the pool and playing the games- who cares if other kids can swim independently, it’s about confidence in the water and having fun for us!

Agree with PPs saying to find a different swimming school. It sounds as if your DS has outgrown the "toddler swimming and water play with parent in water" classes and is ready for something more structured and challenging. Look for a swimming school with a good local reputation (try local Facebook parent groups for reviews) where the groups are small and the instructor is in the water with them at all times. They usually start from 3.5 and your DC will not be expected to have anything other than perhaps some basic water confidence (i.e. is willing to get in and join in rather than panicking and screaming for you, no need for any actual swimming skills at all). He sounds like he enjoys the water, which is a good start.

My now grown up children all swim like fishes but they didn't learn to swim until they were at school. I took them swimming a lot when they were tiny and they were all very confident in the water, they would "swim" under the water, no armbands or flotation devices but they didn't learn to swim properly at the baby/toddler/preschool classes I paid for. They just sort of bumbled around in the water. The school they went to had swimming lessons from reception and they all just learnt then. Different set up, different teachers. Perhaps see if there's a different class that may have a different approach.

If your class is a bit like water babies then its purpose is not really to teach them to swim but to get them to not fear the water.
Now he’s 4 he’s ready to move up to a class without you. That’s the way to learn to swim. You need to let go, recognise he’s grown up (your embarrassment is telling you this) and get him signed up. The teacher takes them across one at a time (no armbands) holding them whilst they are on their backs at the start. None of them could swim when my DS and DD started the class age 4 including them. They too had been going to the pool with me from weeks old and couldn’t yet swim.
it all sounds completely normal except the bit where you are not ready to move on to letting him go to a class without you.

whkst It’s great that some two year olds are being taken to swim lessons I don’t think you need to be embarrassed .
its good that she’s doing it now, and that you are taking her to classes.
she will be receptive to learning and perhaps strong so will advance well.
either way it’s good to have lessons .

my daughter swims in the pool all summer, but at4/5 flat out refused to go to a class, she is nervous about being away from me.
now she is 6 she is ready to do lessons.

she goes to ice skating lessons. There are 5 year olds and 14/15 year olds in the same class.

I think it shows resilience in he older kids that they are prepared to learn with younguns.

it’s a skill, you need to learn it with other who are learning it too.

He is probably too young to realize. Try to find an intensive course (every day for a fortnight) as this is by far the quickest way to learn.

Way better to be four with a class of two year olds, than ten with a class of five year olds. Or have the danger/embarrassment of not being able to swim.