Not really celebrating Christmas?

[rosesareredvioletsareblueaimverytiredandsoareyou]

Anyone else considering just 'not really doing' Christmas this year? We've always been pretty low key but done presents for DS and had a meal etc. I've never really enjoyed the whole experience that much, but liked to see DS happy. I had happy childhood Christmas times, mainly just with close family, but I realise how draining it was for mum looking back. DS is older now, he actually got his main present from us early last year (he was there to buy it to ensure it was the right one and so we just let him have it early), and has no issue not getting presents on 'the big day'. We're also in the process of decorating and hopefully upgrading the heating soon, so any 'extra' energy I have will be geared towards all that entails! I'm not expecting others to all agree with this approach - I am more interested in those who also do low key/no celebration, there's plenty of threads to talk about big Christmas celebrations elsewhere (feel free to vote though).
AIBU:
YABU - Bah Humbug, you sad eejit, you must celebrate!
YANBU - Low key/no celebration works for/appeals to me - there's better things to spend money on!

Given it was stolen by Christians in the first place, maybe we’ve just gone back to our pagan roots!

Ooh, where do you go? Considering a little roadtrip to Europe over Xmas but thought most places would be pretty much taken over by festivities.

That's fair enough.

I thought you'd meant no gift as you'd already got something earlier in the year.

As long as he is happy, go for it ☺️

I used to LOVE Christmas but the older im getting it seems so much more stressful. I have a 5.5 year old though so we still go all out, but I can see us cutting back when he’s older or even going away. It’s the expectation of it I don’t like, like you must be happy and joyful, and that gets me down.
Do what you have to do!

I love everything about Christmas apart from how early it starts, but am also of the opinion that "you do you" - but your voting leaves no room for that!

YABU - Bah Humbug, you sad eejit, you must celebrate! (Don't agree, you do you)
YANBU - Low key/no celebration works for/appeals to me - there's better things to spend money on! (It doesn't appeal to me, so don't agree with this either!)

It is Estepona in Southern Spain. It is a working town and is open all year round, and (sorry for sounding snobby or anything) is as far from the Full English breakfast scene as you can get in that region. You could have a look on google maps and see the lovely Old Town, the Paseo (tiled and paved walkway) all along the beach area with lovely coffee stops etc. Yes that is in December/January.

Weather can be hit and miss, but is ALWAYS warmer than home, and the days are longer with sunset about 6pm ish. That is such a bonus compared to deepest Winter at home.

We sometimes venture off and have gone to Seville for a couple of days, then Cordoba and Granada and so on.

My brother owns a place there (he's the rich one in the family lol!), and is very generous with offering it out to family. He has kids so doesn't/can't go at Christmas. Bonus for us! The cost of living down there is so much better than home, and we can avail of free accommodation although we pay a generous sum (not asked for) for the utilities and cleaning etc.

Highly recommend, and I know we are lucky to be able to do it.

He got his main gift earlier in the year last year and also got a few nice things to open on the day from us, please presents from relatives - he did pretty well, and is still using the main gift from last year too. 😁

Fair enough....I went for all or nothing in the voting options....😵‍💫

I didn’t vote because I think the answer lies in the middle. I’ve done alternative Christmas before and it’s been wonderful. I still need something special though. A nice meal, though it doesn’t have to be a traditional roast at home, and for me, something that acknowledges the solstice.

now I haven’t done that since having a child. She would never be ok with it. She has ASD and keeps adding to her written list of required December activities. Few are expensive in anything but my time.

You’re so right about this. I must say I don’t find it particularly stressful. Cook a roast dinner, have family over, give a few gifts, I wonder if those who find it stressful are putting too much pressure on themselves to make it perfect? It’s friends and family that really matter and I wouldn’t want to miss a chance to celebrate with them.

I am so over the idea of Christmas, it is such an outdated nonsense.

Based on a story proved to be very inaccurate, celebrated by the manufacture and consumption of tat. People (mainly women) getting stressed about presents and food nobody needs.

Getting together with family or friends, and sticking a few fairy lights on the wall can be done on any day of the year. I am not old and deluded enough yet to think that 25 December so in any way remarkable.

I'm not opting out due to it being stressful tbh. I agree some folk can make it more stressful than it needs to be.

Very torn on this issue. I had idyliic extended family Christmases growing up. Once you're a mother and you realise how much work it is, I did not enjoy it any more! Now divorced and we have awkward polite Christmas days with me, ex DH, my mum and our two teen DC. I dread the day months in advance, I find the whole thing extremely stressful, do the Christmas dinner etc, feel sad that I'm not in a family house any more but in a small flat, have artificial tree as can't get it up the stairs, My Mum is pretty old and travels over from the UK specially, has a lot of requirements, which is fine, but everything feels on the one hand hollow and sad and on the other this huge guilt of trying to make it somehow resemble the earlier family Christmases we were able to give the kids. Both me and ex DH have partners who spend it with their families so we don't see our partners and are in this weird time warp (although we like and respect each other). I feel really depressed even thinking about the fact Christmas is coming up. I know this sounds ungrateful and probably is, but I really don't enjoy it and I just count the hours until it's over and I can stop doing tasks.

honestly the only thing stopping me just going off AWOL somewhere is literally only the guilt that it would damage the kids and be upsetting for my Mum.

We haven't for a while now.
All fake, all brainwashing, you think you have to do something because that is what you've always done .
Very liberating when you realise you don't have too. I hope more people start to think like that.
Make your own choice.
It's nothing but brainwashing from the moment your born.
Most people who celebrate aren't even religious anyway.
Whole things a joke.

Exactly.

I agree with this and this is what it's become. On the other hand, it's a ritual and rituals are part of human nature.
You could say everything we do is brainwashing. Our whole existence follows rituals, traditions and social constructs.
Sometimes it's easy to follow things because everyone else is following it and it just makes it easier to get together with people and share an occasion.

Decorating.

I've been doing that for a fair few months but there's still more to do....😄

Sorry to hijack the thread but there are a few comments like this and they really annoy me.

I love Christmas and don't really understand how it's stressful, I'm about as far from a perfectionist as you could get though so I'm sure that helps.

Surely you know not everyone has the option to have a quiet Christmas or does more than host a single meal. This was my Christmas last year.

1. DH and I work FT and have 3DC. Work always is extra busy in the run up to Christmas
2. Each child had at least two musical performances or activity related Christmas parties that we had to attend in December. That's in addition to their normal weekly activities which only stop between Christmas and New Year.
3. We had 3 relatives visiting for 10 days over Christmas (this is a small number, we once had 7 extra people in the house for a week over Christmas). These relatives live very rurally so wanted to do things they can't normally do like go to various Christmas pantos, shows and events and go shopping the week before Christmas in a city centre so we were taking them out most days.
4. DD1 has her birthday between Christmas and New Year and so had a party with 8 friends staying over for a sleepover between Christmas and New Year.
5. we are Scottish and so always have a Hogmanay Party. We had (different to the ones above) 5 relatives staying the night. So in total we had 16 different extra people staying overnight in the house over the Christmas period. I was washing sheets until February.

Of course hosting so many people for so long is expensive and stressful but it's the stage of life we are at and we're more able to cope with the expense and stress than the retired generation (who would be the ones who would be expected to do it on one side at least). We had quieter Christmases when the DC were small and we lived in a smaller house and will no doubt have quieter Christmases in the future. I just make sure I have time off in January to recover.

It's as low key as it can be with a 9 year old. I do love the idea of a huge picture perfect Hallmark Christmas, but in reality it would be incredibly overwhelming.

Christmas Day is only 24 hours, but obviously there is advent and the feast of the three king so Christmas is "on" for a long time (longer still taking into account candlemas). When DH and I got together we sort of fell into a new set of traditions.

We don't do a tradional Christmas Dinner, DD gets presents but nothing too excessive. We have a tree, and we might go for a walk to see the lights where we live. Our life is simple and uncomplicated and the frenzy of celebration isn't something we take part in.

I can't be bothered with any of it this year.

The kids have so much stuff already, I don't want to buy them anymore stuff. I want my family around me, happy and healthy and good food, that's it. Seeing santa is so expensive and we seen loads, none really have the wow factor anymore so I just can't be bothered.

Just do whatever works for you and your family.

Before kid I never did ‘traditional ‘ xmas as an adult. I did trips, or just go to a nice hotel in town over Xmas and Boxing Day and do spa, room service etc. come home to a clean house and no hassle. Now I have a little DC so I do celebrate a lot more but from this year we start also travelling over the holidays again to other places so hopefully soon the full on Xmas thing is a thing of the past.

I love a decent meal, & a glass of wine or a beer. The Christmas films on Netflix are great. But that’s as far as it goes for me. I’ve had some fabulous times over the years, but things have got quite ridiculous so I don’t enjoy it any more.