AIBU to not let DS16 go on a fishing trip

[CalmDownKenneth]

DS16 has been invited on a fishing trip tomorrow with a friend and his dad. The catch is that they're leaving at 4am and DS wants to walk to their house which is 10 minutes away. We live in a bit of a rough area and it will obviously be dark. So we've told him that he can't go.

He won't ask to be picked up although they would literally be passing the house.
He won't tell his friend why we don't want him to go so they're probably not going to offer.

I feel bad. He's staying with his dad tonight who thinks he has to learn to speak up and organise things. But he really wanted to go 🙁

Were we BU to tell him he can't go out alone at 4am?

His parents could just walk him there. Or a taxi.

Is he now going?

At 16 you should probably let him walk if he feels happy to do so. He can text when he gets there. Or book a taxi.

Of course he won't give you their number - he is 16!

Are you sure the friend/dad isn't just waiting for a yes or no answer as to whether your DS will be going or not, if it's a yes he may offer to pick your DS up as they're driving past.

Drop him off or walk him there? Taxi?

I bet a lot of people will think I wish my kid wanted to spend their free time doing that than going out getting pissed and doing stuff they shouldn't be.

So's walking ten minutes down the road in the dark without his Mum holding his hand.

Absolutely crazy. No wonder U.K. teens are the unhappiest in Europe when we have parents not allowing 16 year olds to walk 10 minutes down the street.

You're not only being unreasonable.. You're being so nasty to your 16 year old.
He's 16 ffs. Let him walk round.
Gosh haven't you been 16 and really wanted to go somewhere with a friend..

FFS your lad is 16. Here in Scotland he could be married ! Stop babying him.

Sort yourselves out. He's 16 ffs

Glad you've sorted it out and he's going. I would have let him walk, but I'd have been nervous and would have wanted a text when he got there. Posters giving you a kicking either don't have daft teenage boys or haven't lived in a dodgy area.

Not many taxi firms would do a short fare let alone a long one at 4am. Maybe an uber but poss not in your area.

Who roams the streets at 4am looking for young boys anyway?!

As long as his Uncle Bryn isn't going, I think he'll be fine.

That's ridiculous, of course taxi firms would.

If they're open for business they want business.

Depends where you live. Not all towns have 24/7 taxi services available.

"Not many taxi firms would do a short fare let alone a long one at 4am."

Eh?

I can't believe you haven't suggested that you will walk with him to his mate's house if you're not going to let him walk on his own. Horrid.

Agree with @banality101

I can't believe you haven't suggested that you will walk with him to his mate's house if you're not going to let him walk on his own. Horrid

Just walk him round. I must admit this thread made me think of Rob Brydon & the famous fishing trip from Gavin & Stacey. I find the idea of fishing quite bizarre anyway. Cold, wet fish in the dark! .

i was thinking the same!

He's 16. He can walk for 10 mins at 4am. Just ask him to send you txt updates so you know he's safe.

Im with OP here. Son sounds helpless. If he wants to go he can be a grown up and sort it out.

I dont get why so many on this thread think the op has been unfair. Insisting he says something like "Hey friend, Id really love to go but my parents are making a fuss about me walking about at that time - seeing as you'll be passing our house anyway, would it be alright if you stop at mine and give me a lift?"
Having the confidence to do that at 16 really isnt a huge ask. Its a life skill. He can ask by text too which makes things even easier.

The comments are funny. At 16 he's old enough and should be expected to walk 10 mins at 4am in a rough area, but he's not old enough be expected to text for a lift? 😂

This is what I would assume too.

I wouldn’t expect a 16yo to walk to my house or have one of their parents drop them off at that time, if I was planning to drive at that time anyway.

This

i would walk with him. Then climb back into bed.