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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Did anyone else's parents smoke in the house

234 replies

Hernamewaslola22 · 11/09/2024 11:54

I sort of can't believe they did really. This wasn't years and years ago either, 90s and early 00s. How could they be so selfish?

OP posts:
Howdull · 11/09/2024 11:56

Mine did, 70's 80's and 90's. Don't think they knew about passive smoking then.

usernother · 11/09/2024 11:56

Yes. Plenty of parents still smoke in the house now.

Waltdisnerd · 11/09/2024 11:57

Still does

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 11/09/2024 11:57

Yes! It was completely normal in those days (obviously I don't think that now) . Smoking in all rooms, in the car, ashtrays by their bed.

Knickerbockergrolia · 11/09/2024 11:57

Yes - 70s, 80s and 90s (think they eventually stopped around the 00s due to serious health conditions). I HATED it but was bulldozed with 'it's our house we'll do what we want'. I wasn't given the space or freedom to consider that it was also MY home and I had not choice as I was a child. It's unthinkable now, but that's the way I was taught to expect things to be :(

jerkchicken · 11/09/2024 11:58

Mine did, up until the early 2000s, and they did many others things I wouldn’t do either. It’s not really something I think about to be honest.

Clumsy12345 · 11/09/2024 11:59

Yes when we were children my mum use to share a room with 3 of us and would smoke in the room (not even out the window) she also smoked in the car when I was pregnant with my daughter this was only 13 years ago so not ages ago.

SauviGone · 11/09/2024 11:59

FIL still does. He lives alone though.

We don’t ever go to his house any more, I finally put my foot down after years of stinking and having to wash all of our clothes after visiting him.

LibertyStars · 11/09/2024 12:00

Yes, it was pretty common then.

Would I do it? No.
Do I do anything that will be discovered to be dangerous to children on 30 years’ time? Who knows?

Hoppinggreen · 11/09/2024 12:01

My Dad did and it was awful, yellow walls and the constant smell.
He refused to stop or go outside even when my Mum was hospitalised with pneumonia and came home struggling to breathe.
He was a selfish arsehole in so many ways but thankfully it meant that I have never felt the urge to smoke

Clumsy12345 · 11/09/2024 12:01

Thinking about it my mum also use to send my brother up to the shops when he was around 7/8 with a note to buy cigarettes for her (he was born in 1999 so this would have been early 2000s wouldn’t happen now)

pretzel1212 · 11/09/2024 12:03

Yep. Nicotine stained ceilings 😃
They started to smoke outside early 00s
Not sure why they changed.
Both quit now. Was 80s and 90s.

Sleepydoor · 11/09/2024 12:04

LibertyStars · 11/09/2024 12:00

Yes, it was pretty common then.

Would I do it? No.
Do I do anything that will be discovered to be dangerous to children on 30 years’ time? Who knows?

I don't agree with the suggestion that it's all relative.

Whatever thing I did that may turn out to be damaging one day, my kids never complained loudly that they couldn't breath after travelling in the car on long rides with both parents smoking with the windows rolled up in winter.

Singleandproud · 11/09/2024 12:04

Yes, my parents smoked indoors when I was very small and then outdoors only. I'm very anti smoking, Mum stopped the day she came to my 12 week scan and dad stopped when DD was 6months old or so as I said I'd stop coming around as he handed her back to me and she stunk just from the transfer of smoke from his clothes to hers.

My cousin's non-shared nan used to chain smoke in their kitchen and would be lighting the next one before shed finished her previous one. We were adjust sent outside or to play jn the bedrooms.

But we did all sorts of stuff that I'd never let DD do, like sit in the boot of the car or on someone's lap. 12 of us travelled to a family party in the back of a van that had a mattress in the bottom of it to make it 'safe'.

Newnametoday5 · 11/09/2024 12:05

Yes my parents both smoked at home in front of us. My siblings(3 of them) and I didn't come to any harm but realise now that it could have had a very different outcome. We are in middle age now and none of us are smokers. Parents were indeed selfish but looking back my school friends were in the same situation, dad chain smoking when he came home from work and probably chain smoking at work too if permitted. Imagine a new mother smoking while feeding her babies!!!!! Yes it was not that unusual.

Vettrianofan · 11/09/2024 12:06

Yes my DM did and we had arguments about it. I was upset about the smell growing up.

VivaLaSpag · 11/09/2024 12:07

Yeh mine did up until the mid nineties-then we moved to a new house where the garage was attached to the kitchen so they would smoke in the garage instead. That fixed everything coz the smoke knew it’s place and that it was not to drift into the kitchen…. 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

It was normal back then though and even with the smoking isolated to the garage they would still smoke in the car, and we’d still be taken to smokey restaurants and pubs etc etc 🤷🏻‍♀️ Horrifying when you look back

MissyB1 · 11/09/2024 12:07

Yes my dad was a chain smoker, our walls and ceilings were all stained. Us kids must have all stank of smoke. This was in 70s and 80s, he died of a smoking related illness when I was 16.

Trebol · 11/09/2024 12:08

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at the poster's request

urbanbuddha · 11/09/2024 12:09

My parents didn’t smoke but family and friends did. The morning after New Year when they had a party my mum would wring out a damp towel and flick it round the living room to get rid of the smell of smoke. She had a little dish of damp charcoal to absorb the smoke. Candles were meant to “burn the smoke” but it was too risky at New Year to have them.

Ohdoboreoff · 11/09/2024 12:11

Yep. 90s kid.
My dad was a 60 a day man, mum was on 20. Our living room was permanently foggy. When people visited and they all sat around smoking like chimneys, DB and I used to make a game out of crawling on the floor underneath the thick cloud of smoke. Makes me cough just imagining it now 😷

I had terrible ENT issues in childhood, spent the first 13 years of my life with almost permanent tonsillitis, glue ear / ear infections, conjunctivitis, sinus infections etc. Had loads of operations to remove tonsils, adenoids, drain my ears etc.
I was almost deaf due to the glue ear and my speech was delayed as a result, so I also had to take the shame in school when other kids laughed at me because I couldnt talk properly.

All of which was probably unnecessary if we'd been raised in clean air. Thanks mum and dad!

StartingANewNameToday · 11/09/2024 12:13

Yes. 80's, 90's and early 00's until I moved out. And in the car, with the windows shut. Both parents, puffing away on 40 a day each...very heavy smokers.

It was the key reason I moved out at 18, first chance I got. My clothes stank within minutes of being washed and hung up, my room stank, my hair stank.

My school coat was the worst thing. Hung on a peg next to the living room where most exposed. And it was a big, puffy winter jacket that seemed to absorb smells more than anything else.

I have a very clear memory of being about 13 and it just getting too much one day and feeling sick at the thought that classmates could smell me. I faked illness and went and sat in the nurses office. I did this a few times until I decided I'd rather be cold and wet and just stopped wearing my coat altogether.

TarantinoIsAMisogynist · 11/09/2024 12:15

Mine did too. Smoking at home and in workplaces used to be completely normal. It was even considered normal to sit at a restaurant table and light up.

So your parents were acting in line with the social norms of the time. It may not be right, but it's not something I'd look to apportion blame for.

TarantinoIsAMisogynist · 11/09/2024 12:17

Ohdoboreoff · 11/09/2024 12:11

Yep. 90s kid.
My dad was a 60 a day man, mum was on 20. Our living room was permanently foggy. When people visited and they all sat around smoking like chimneys, DB and I used to make a game out of crawling on the floor underneath the thick cloud of smoke. Makes me cough just imagining it now 😷

I had terrible ENT issues in childhood, spent the first 13 years of my life with almost permanent tonsillitis, glue ear / ear infections, conjunctivitis, sinus infections etc. Had loads of operations to remove tonsils, adenoids, drain my ears etc.
I was almost deaf due to the glue ear and my speech was delayed as a result, so I also had to take the shame in school when other kids laughed at me because I couldnt talk properly.

All of which was probably unnecessary if we'd been raised in clean air. Thanks mum and dad!

Being fair, you don't know that your ENT issues were caused by smoke.

They may have been, but I also know kids raised in smoke-free homes who have experienced the same ENT issues you describe.

hookiewookie29 · 11/09/2024 12:19

Yes,I'm 56 and my Dad was a 40 a day man. He always smoked in the house. He died aged 70 from lung cancer. My Grandad was the same.