To skip the next in-law family meet up. I find myself disliking family the more I learn about them...

[AberdeenQueen]

After a weekend away, I found myself disliking each family individual just a little bit more than I did before. Some for new really trivial reasons, some because I found them hard work socially 20 years ago and still do today.

We don't live near each other, but I feel a bit sad that out of 12 people there's not one that I didn't have to pull myself together to make an effort with.

I am now fully up to speed with what they do, did, want to be, hobbies etc some was repeats of old conversations, some new. No one at all asked me what I do, did or want to do (and I have stuff going on). I was asked about my husband's job.

I'm full of HRT and recently had old friends to stay who I really enjoyed. Just bloody in-law family have left me completely numb inside and they are talking about repeating the whole bloody charade within a few months again.

AIBU to skip the next meet up.

Sounds like everyone is in their ‘groove’ like in a record and a bomb blast wouldn’t jolt them out of it. Look at transactional analysis wiki page. Should sum it all up.

if you start leaving all the arrangements to DH would that stop the meet ups?

also just do every other one.

I think I get what you mean, you added the Lamborghini to add some flavour. They dismissed it. Or perhaps - what happens to me - didn’t register what you said as it matters so little.

Or maybe they took it as a little boast - again some people take absolutely everything you do in day to day life as showing off - and they shut it down.

I don’t think it does. I think it was unnecessary and brings nothing. It’s not unusual to not like people with certain characteristics and it’s not out of the question to think members of a family will share characteristics

youve given it 20 years, you make an effort with them but they don’t make an effort with you. You’re (peri)menopausal and fucking sick of wasting time on people that don’t deserve it.

as I say to my husband, when we get to a certain age we have no more fucks to give. 🤷‍♀️

Why would you put yourself through such an ordeal?

Not a chance I would do that more than twice, even for family.

Send your husband on his own to have the arse bored off him, by HIS family if he wants.

Not your circus.

What a shame you're going to get Covid a couple of days before. (I've heard a drop of orange juice on the test strip is your friend here 😉)