WIBU to put an egg on his mash?

[Almostneverunreasonable]

DH usually makes nice mashed potato. But this year, he has started adding mustard, a lot of it, to the mash. The two DCs and I don’t like mustard mash. His first response, when this was raised, was ‘tough, I do’.

I suggested that he served ours into a separate bowl, then added the mustard to his own.

Next time we had mash, no change, everyone was served the mustard mash.

I pointed out he was spoiling the food we had all been looking forward to. ‘But I like it’ was the response.

The next time ‘oh, I forgot you didn’t like it’.

He has form for being controlling and dictatorial. I think this is just another way of enforcing his will on the family, that we have to eat something we don’t like, because he says so.

He doesn’t like eggs. WIBU to break an egg on his mustard mash next time he serves it to us all? He might then remember that food you have been looking forward to being spoiled by the addition of an ingredient you don’t like is not a pleasant experience.

Alternatively I could insist on making the mash myself (which is not as creamy as his, he will complain) or hiding the mustard. But I think an egg on his mash would have more memorable impact.

Frankly, I’d shove his potato masher up his arse and walk out

hide the mustard

Gosh, that sounds awful! I’d much rather be single than in a position like yours. I hope you’re not finding it too stressful!

Mustard is one of my most hated condiments. Chuck his mustard out as far as it will go.

He's being an arse. I would not stand for it.

You’re not going to make him see your point of view because he doesn’t want to.

I'd just throw away the mustard as no-one else likes it and he's using it to make life difficult for everyone else. When he complains that he likes it, say "Tough, I don't".

Why are you allowing your kids to grow up in an abusive household?

He is controlling and not a nice person. Is that the memories you want your kids to have about their childhood?

This is more important than mustard or eggs

Yes, this isn’t a light hearted situation is it OP? He is repeatedly acting in a way that causes detriment to his own wife and children.

What a nasty bastard

Wow your DH sounds incredibly selfish.

My DH likes butter in mash but I don't, so he serves mine first then adds butter to his. It's not that difficult!

Btw probably the best cooking tipsI received in recent years was for making excellent mash. Tip 1 was to use baked potatoes as oppposed to boiled potatoes (although appreciate boiled potatoes are quicker). Tip 2 was to push the potatoes through a sieve as it's way more effective at providing a smoother mash than any potato masher/ricer can. These tips were a proper game changer for us!

Whenever I've had a hard week or 2, or am feeling generally down in the dumps I look at MN and read posts like yours. Remembering that people actually live in relationships like this is a great way to gain some perspective that no matter what happens, my life will never be this petty and miserable.

He sounds like an insufferable, selfish twat. Get some M&S ready made mash and hide it in the freezer - it’s not the best but it will do in a pinch. Next time he serves up the mustard laden shite that he loves, smile sweetly, dump yours and the kids mash in the bin and nuke the M&S stuff. You can then legitimately say that you thought he might “forget” you didn’t like it again, so got an alternative, just in case. Far less passive aggressive than the egg but also enables you to take back control. But seriously op, we are talking about you as an adult being able to choose the food you eat? If this a reflection of how he behaves, do you really want to continue in the relationship?

This - OP, this is not right, and you and your DC deserve better

You’re focusing on the wrong thing

He has form for being controlling and dictatorial. I think this is just another way of enforcing his will on the family, that we have to eat something we don’t like, because he says so.

Mash is the least of your worries. However you react to this remember you may have children witnessing it and being damaged by silly games, they pick up on the emotions and stress of these situations much more than you think. Deal with it properly as an adult out of sight and hearing of the children.

You've got bigger problems than mash , concentrate on those and don't play games

This is weird behaviour from him and serves no purpose other than to upset everyone else. What a selfish prick.

I wouldn't bother with the whole egg thing though, don't be drawn into childish petty behaviour like that especially when it could end up making mealtimes even more miserable for the kids.

I assume you’re putting in plans to leave this twat, but in the mean time, stop cooking for him, just cook for you and dc. If he tries to help himself to your food, say no, that’s for dc, and he should stick to his favourite mustard mash.

This.

Do you make your children eat it? I have lifelong eating issues because I was made to eat food I disliked/hated

I'd just pop some chips in the oven and scrape the mash into the bin (along with him)

I feel sorry for your children.

Cook your own mash and scrape DH into the bin

Why is this such an issue? Why not make two pots of mashed potato so that your husband can do what he wants with his and you can add what you prefer to yours?

We add mustard to our mash. We all enjoy it. If one of us didn't they'd get theirs plated up and the mustard added to the rest.

He is an unreasonable bully. Fuck him and his mash op.

Because it sounds like he cooks it, and won't split it before adding the mustard.

I LOL'd that thanks a lot. But also is exactly what the OP should do. I mean how much trouble is it to only add mustard to his portion?