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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's just me that doesn't want the 6 weeks to end !

159 replies

seasonalnamepending · 03/09/2024 19:31

Reading on here and on various other different social media platforms has me thinking that I am quite alone in not wanting my child to go back to school tomorrow.
I have absolutely loved the summer holidays - it's my first one after the first year in reception, and I just don't want her to go back!
I'm going to really miss her!
All I saw before the summer holidays was parents saying how much they were dreading it, and midway through saying they were counting down the days until September..
And now, all I am seeing is posts and videos of parents joking about how they will be at the gates early, practically shoving their children through the gates and skipping home afterwards.
It makes me quite sad. Why have children if you don't want to spend time with them??

Anyone else going to miss the time they get with their children during the holidays ?

OP posts:
MrsFarmerTom · 03/09/2024 21:19

@seasonalnamepending I don't think your post was that bad.
I have 2 NT DC, one in primary and a toddler. I work - admittedly only 3 days/week. We have a smallish house with a very small courtyard garden. Our joint household income in the SE is just shy of 40k. We have one set of grandparents locally but they are elderly and can only manage the DC for 3 hours once a week.
So I'm not super privileged but I'm also not dealing with some of the stresses that other families are dealing with.
I feel absolutely bereft at school starting. DS is excited - he's snuggled up in bed with me atm, already wearing his school uniform ready for tomorrow! And I'm glad he's excited. But I'll miss him so much. It's not that we've had an amazing, exciting summer full of adventures, but we've had so much time together, and they're such fantastic little people. There have been stressful periods, and it's been hard to figure out childcare. But I'm gutted that the holiday is over - I would take another 6 weeks of the same just to get the time together with them.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 03/09/2024 21:22

I don’t want to join in a bun fight or pile on, but surely parents who work are the vast majority? So I mean where both or the only parent in the house work(s).

Or is it me who’s out of touch?

ISpyNoPlumPie · 03/09/2024 21:27

seasonalnamepending · 03/09/2024 21:02

Well I think I will leave it here for now.
If you are offended, I sincerely apologise.
I have tried to explain my point of view, my understanding and update my initial intent and aim of this post.
I have given you a bit more of my life to put things into perspective as some had gotten me totally wrong.
But still, I seem to have started an argument, and for that I am sorry.

I think YOU have gotten others wrong, not the other way round. And yet, you can’t acknowledge that, you just keep adding to the list of caveats “oh not you in your difficult circumstances that I didn’t ever think about before posting something deliberately inflammatory”.

I find the holidays much more stressful than term time. I wish it were different, I wish I had long lazy summer days, endless money, plenty of support, perfectly behaved kids, and some downtime for myself. It’s not really a leap of the imagination to realise that most people don’t have that.

Crazycatlady79 · 03/09/2024 21:29

seasonalnamepending · 03/09/2024 19:54

I didn't bring work into this for that reason. I really admire the parents that have to juggle this and I in no way mean that they are inferior parents. In fact, they are far superior to myself in many ways. But I won't go into that.
I'm sorry my post rubbed you the wrong way.
I mean more so, that parents that are luckily able to have their children all of the holidays, do not value that time at all

Show quote history

Oh, piss off.
I am fortunate enough to have all the hols with my 6 year old twins. However, it's all day every day with absolutely no break. Both my daughters are Autistic and have ADHD; Twin 2 is incredibly challenging and oppositional in behavioural terms and has to be supervised pretty much at all times, as her sensory seeking tendencies include trying to cut her skin and/or hurt herself. She also frequently lashes out at either her twin or me.
The Dad is barely on the scene, so it really is just me.
So, yeah, I love my daughters with all my heart and there were some beautiful moments, but it's warranty relentless.
So, yes, I was sad, but also fucking delighted about the school year starting today.

vickylou78 · 03/09/2024 21:32

For me summer hols are a big juggling nightmare with work. Kids argue. House is a mess and no time to clean it as either working or looking after the kids. Feel guilty all the time that sahm:s are out having a lovely time with Thier kids while mine are getting shipped off to granny's or holiday clubs or they are watching TV while I work.

Suspect though if I had 6 weeks off just to play with my kids (and maybe do a bit of housework) would be nice and I would enjoy it.

MaryShelley1818 · 03/09/2024 21:33

I agree with you OP!! Absolutely gutted the summer holidays are over and feels like they've gone so quickly.
I hate being tied to school runs and clubs, and yes I work full time in a very busy job but bought additional annual leave and work condensed hours and used flexi so managed 2 full weeks off, 2 weeks of just working 2 days, and then a few other days. I've had so many lovely days out with the children and it's been some much needed valuable time together as term time feels like I barely see them.

Hotorope · 03/09/2024 21:34

Nope I don’t want them to go back either. Hate the routine of the school run and I miss them. I’m honest about it when people ask me and most people say they feel the same! I think normally we all pretend and joke about it.

Tumbleweed101 · 03/09/2024 21:37

Mine are older but I loved the summer hols. Just had my last one as my youngest is going into year 11.

26years of school runs and summer hols in the last few months really. She’ll be finished by end June.

MiniCooperLover · 03/09/2024 21:43

Get a job, have to juggle that and childcare plus your useless partner and then see how much you love the 6 week break .....

vickylou78 · 03/09/2024 21:45

seasonalnamepending · 03/09/2024 21:00

I certainly do, but I will still miss the holidays. I prefer it when it is like this. No rush around every morning, nothing to necessarily remember, no tight schedules and times we have to be in certain places etc.

Show quote history

See I think this is where your experience differs to a lot of parents. Summer holidays are still rushing about in the morning and having to be places if you are a working parent and often worse as holiday clubs may involve a longer journey too.

Hotorope · 03/09/2024 21:46

vickylou78 · 03/09/2024 21:45

See I think this is where your experience differs to a lot of parents. Summer holidays are still rushing about in the morning and having to be places if you are a working parent and often worse as holiday clubs may involve a longer journey too.

Show quote history

Yes agree with this. I had 3 weeks off which definitely added to my enjoyment!

Relearningbehaviour · 03/09/2024 21:59

I have 4. I love them with all my heart. But equally can't wait for them to go back to school. Because I am questioning my sanity...!

Why did I have kids.... because they are for life! They are only kids for so long. I enjoy them as kids and I'm looking forward to enjoying them as adults (which is a longer stint that childhood!)

BellesAndGraces · 03/09/2024 22:02

seasonalnamepending · 03/09/2024 20:16

That is rude. I am not disparaging anybody !
I'm talking about the people that openly say they practically hate the summer holidays and can't wait for school to start again!

Show quote history

You genuinely think saying “why have children if you don’t want to spend time with them” is not disparaging anybody?

Littlemisscapable · 03/09/2024 22:04

vickylou78 · 03/09/2024 21:45

See I think this is where your experience differs to a lot of parents. Summer holidays are still rushing about in the morning and having to be places if you are a working parent and often worse as holiday clubs may involve a longer journey too.

Show quote history

Yes this. The summer is lovely with then if you are off and have enough money to enjoy it. Plenty aren't this lucky.

bows101 · 03/09/2024 22:05

I'm also ready for mine to go back. It really drags after a while and the thought of another day out to a child oriented place makes me want to scream. Equally, my DC can't wait to go back to school and mingle with the other kids who they wouldn't normally see out of school.

Smurf1993 · 03/09/2024 22:07

You have to remember OP that on Mumsnet it's insensitive to enjoy parenthood and you should be struggling like everyone else or you're smug 🙄

BendingSpoons · 03/09/2024 22:08

We have had a lovely summer and managed to do lots. (Lots of playdates and seeing family, along with some bigger stuff). I do work but was able to take quite a bit of time off. I am a bit sad they are back at school but I am also so tired and really looking forward to Friday (my day off) when I can be home alone in silence! I love them dearly, but a bit of absence makes the heart grow fonder and it does me good to miss them a bit.

BiscuitDreams · 03/09/2024 22:10

I don't want mine to go to school tomorrow. 😭 I've had such a lovely time and I get sad when they go back every time. I'm lucky in that I'm self employed and work is very flexible, and my DC are generally quite easy and just lovely to be around. They are happy (ish) to go back because they want to see their friends, so I'm happy for them. But still I'm not looking forward to the school run tomorrow.

FusionChefGeoff · 03/09/2024 22:12

Do you work OP?

Veryoldandtired · 03/09/2024 22:17

I’m with you OP! It’s been challenging but I really loved this summer. Could cry now thinking my DS needs to go back to school tomorrow. My DD is still my mini shadow but I dread the day she goes to school.
Dont get me wrong, I’m excited for them to have their own life but having my children with me really fills my cup

Babbahabba · 03/09/2024 22:38

I do enjoy spending time with DD/ she's lovely but it's the expense of days out and only being in work half the time is stressful. I'm in a management position and the only person who does my job so I spend my time at work catching up & preparing to be off again. The lack of school traffic on my commute is good. I also like not having early get ups/uniform/homework/packed lunches etc.

CODYLOVER · 03/09/2024 22:39

this feeling is why millions home educate

Babbahabba · 03/09/2024 22:43

Also I do get sick of being around other children, especially younger ones. DS is 18 & DD is 8 and as cute as they are, I am thoroughly over spending time around young noisy boisterous kids. I've also been lucky to have two well behaved (but not perfect by any means) kids and seeing naughty kids and feckless parents make me inwardly seethe.

Gorgeousfeet · 03/09/2024 22:52

Mine go back tomorrow and we’re dreading it. Not only will we miss them hugely but we loathe the changes in them so soon after they go back as they pick up so much nonsense and silly behaviour from other children ( can’t be helped - fuck all we can do about it) and to add I am
dreading the school drop off and pick up and all the bollocks that comes with that.

It’s been a really rough summer for us so in all honesty I would keep them here if I could …. ( deep sigh ❤️❤️)

gaininginsight · 03/09/2024 23:09

I feel the same and have loved it but for practical reasons I want them to go back. It was great when I was off two weeks and we went away and spent quality time together but the last two weeks wfh I just feel guilty when they're upstairs rotting on video games that I can't do anything productive or fun with them. For their sake I can't wait for them to go back!