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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To try to quit mumsnet

52 replies

cosyleafcafe · 03/09/2024 16:40

Does anyone else find this site incredibly addictive but also kind of toxic?

There's so much negativity I feel like it isn't doing my mental health any good and it also makes me really, really unproductive.

But I have tried to stop coming on here - including using a browser extension that blocks the site - and I always end up coming back.

Anyone else?

OP posts:
hereismydog · 03/09/2024 16:50

So just stop logging in? Why make a thread that’s going to keep you coming on here and checking for replies if you don’t think it’s doing you any good?

Boomer55 · 03/09/2024 16:50

Stop reading it. 🤷‍♀️

TheGrimSqueakersFlea · 03/09/2024 16:51

Try posting on flouncers corner

JefftheChef · 03/09/2024 16:52

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

AbitSceptical · 03/09/2024 16:52

Do or do not. There is no try. (Yoda)

DiamondGoldandSilver · 03/09/2024 16:53

@hereismydog

very kind of you to provide an example of the types of rude posts the OP probably has in mind 🤣

I find the 2nd or so post is regularly really mean or oddly rude to the OP and have often wondered if it’s a game some people play on here

gamerchick · 03/09/2024 16:54

Roach hotel.

Only thing you can do is log out and have some control about logging back in.

GenAvocadoOnToast · 03/09/2024 16:54

I keep trying to quit because it's such a time drain but it's very addictive. I often come away from threads feeling annoyed. I have a blocker set up but clearly that's not working out so well.

ReadWithScepticism · 03/09/2024 16:55

Yes, it is toxic. But much less toxic than Twitter and similar. I re-registered here in order to quit Twitter. A bit like switching cigarettes for less deadly (but still sickening) vaping.

comedycentral · 03/09/2024 16:55

If you feel addicted then you could either go cold turkey and not go on at all or limit yourself to a set time a day and not stray outside of that time. Can you block it on your phone and only allow it on a laptop or something. Social media can be addictive and Mumsnet is very similar to social media.

hereismydog · 03/09/2024 16:55

DiamondGoldandSilver · 03/09/2024 16:53

@hereismydog

very kind of you to provide an example of the types of rude posts the OP probably has in mind 🤣

I find the 2nd or so post is regularly really mean or oddly rude to the OP and have often wondered if it’s a game some people play on here

It’s the most logical solution to the ‘problem’ and I don’t think I was rude at all.

Aquamarine1029 · 03/09/2024 16:56

You can't leave without a dramatic flounce. That's the rule.

Aquamarine1029 · 03/09/2024 16:57

DiamondGoldandSilver · 03/09/2024 16:53

@hereismydog

very kind of you to provide an example of the types of rude posts the OP probably has in mind 🤣

I find the 2nd or so post is regularly really mean or oddly rude to the OP and have often wondered if it’s a game some people play on here

Their post wasn't rude at all, in any way.

vodkaredbullgirl · 03/09/2024 16:59

Just delete

AsYouWiiiiiiiiiiiiish · 03/09/2024 17:13

I deleted Tiktok a month ago and its been brilliant.

If you are genuinely struggling not to come onto Mumsnet then that's an issue and I would go cold turkey.

Its not healthy to be dependent on social media

TheMamaYo · 03/09/2024 17:19

YANBU! It’s the same for me. 🙄🤷‍♀️

Garlicnaan · 03/09/2024 17:22

Yep. I found myself idly coming on here for no good reason, it's a great site if you need advice but easy to get sucked into threads that don't serve you and wasting hours on here. I blocked it for months and didn't miss it. In fact I'm getting back to time wasting here so thanks for the reminder to block again!

Imperfectionist · 03/09/2024 17:29

Thanks for starting this thread. I totally relate. I’ve also tried app blockers to quit Mumsnet (along with other social media) but always end up sneaking back on and losing hours.

In fact I’ve managed to completely quit other social platforms but this one keeps bringing me back and is a real time suck, I find it addictive and compulsive.

The content largely makes me feel angry or sad, or meh, rather than supported, inspired or informed.

Many posters seem awful and inflexible, nobody gives benefit of the doubt, and it’s much more polarised and combative than when I joined 15 years ago.

I’m going to try and block it for good. thanks again for letting me know it’s not just me.

Original poster
cosyleafcafe · 03/09/2024 17:33

@Imperfectionist Exactly - I relate to all of that. It is compulsive!

I think there's something about the connection with a large community of other people at your fingertips, even if a lot of it is negative.

Perhaps anyone on this thread who feels the same as me should have a mumsnet amnesty and not log on from tomorrow.

OP posts:
SunQueen24 · 03/09/2024 17:34

And me 👋🏼
I am convinced my DH is having an affair, has a porn addiction and that I am UR in all my thoughts…

Justme2023123 · 03/09/2024 17:35

I left for about 5 years, when I was on it originally I'd read every post on some threads. Now I only read the first couple and the OP's updates. If I feel a thread is looking like a pile on I just stop reading. I do like it for just a bit of zoning out though

Jonisaysitbest · 03/09/2024 17:39

I need to quit too.
I keep reading posts which make me anxious - eg ones about savings, pensions, money etc.
And other ones make me paranoid.
And I am drawn to ones which are triggering too.
It's like pressing on a bruise or worrying a mouth ulcer for me I think.
Time to stop. Thanks OP, you have given me the incentive!

IMustDoMoreExercise · 03/09/2024 17:53

Justme2023123 · 03/09/2024 17:35

I left for about 5 years, when I was on it originally I'd read every post on some threads. Now I only read the first couple and the OP's updates. If I feel a thread is looking like a pile on I just stop reading. I do like it for just a bit of zoning out though

This is exactly what I do.

If they become toxic, I just read the OP's updates and ignore the other posts.

ReadingWorm · 03/09/2024 18:06

Addictive no. Toxic yes.

But I’ll be here until I find other site where I can tell a random stranger they are being unreasonable or anonymously voice my dated opinions.

Happiestwhen · 03/09/2024 18:13

Yes , there are some very nasty users on MN but on AIBU particularly. These people must live very unhappy lives so I actually feel sorry for them (and whoever has to put up with them irl)