Dinner times at grandparents'

[applestrudels]

If you had very young grandchildren (under 5), who usually ate dinner at 5pm, whereas you normally ate dinner between 8 and 9pm, and then you invited your grandchildren, along with their parents, to stay at your house for a few days, would you try and make the children's dinner at 5pm, or would you stick to your normal routine of dinner anywhere between 8 and 9pm, or would you compromise (so, 6 or 7pm)?

YANBU: I would try and make dinner earlier, at least for the children
YABU: My house, my rules. Dinner is at MY usual time.

When I stay with (not parents but similar age) I cook my children their dinner at the time they want to eat (5.30ish)_*?, and then adults will eat together.
Occasionally if it's Sunday Roast etc we all eat together then might have supper later

Surely that depends when you go to bed. I often eat dinner at 10ish after work. But I'm not tucked up by half past

I'd probably do a " tea" for the kids about half 5 and proper dinner for adults at a decent hour

I guess you either not working full time or don't see them on work days then

My kids are asleep by 8 so no way they could wait til then for tea! We all eat together at 5.30 as I'm not cooking two meals, but in someone else's house I'd hope for early kids tea and then adults later (though would eat up kids food as otherwise I'd practically be eating the table by 8)

How much time? 7 hours ?

Why? Aren't we allowed to choose a time that suits us?

I would absolutely hate to eat late and don't know anyone who has dinner as late as 8pm.

We were never home til 5:30 at best. Small meal at nursery at 4:30 and dinner at 6:30 here. Not many families with two working parents could manage dinner at 4.

I believe internationally the very early meals and bedtimes for young DC in the UK are very much an outlier.

I don't think 8 is late at all. I would never dream of booking a table for earlier than 8 if I'm eating out, and would usually book for 8.30 or 9. I can't imagine eating my evening meal at 5 - I woukd be starving again by 10 or 11!

Do either of you work, perhaps odd shift patterns? I just can't fathom how a family can sit down for dinner together at 4.45pm!
When my kids were nursery age dinner was at 6.30pm, I finished work, rushed to collect them from nursery and get home! 6.30pm was the absolute earliest I could have food prepared.

Most people have dinner between 5-6pm and most young kids arnt even awake ny 9pm so you're being very unreasonable to even have the thought of this.
Definitely make everyone's dinner for 5-6pm. If my child have to go tontheir grandparents and wait until that tike I'd have already ran aroind to teaco and bought someone for them and left the next morning nevwr to stay again.

Agree the kids should eat then if that’s what works, but a bit unfair to make adults eat that early.

My kids are in bed by 7, dinner at 4:30

Why is it any more unfair than making adults who normally eat at 5pm wait until 9pm?

It’s perfectly possible to have a family meal later than 5:30

I see where you are coming from but kids had had something at nursery and weren't waiting till later.
I worked nights and weekends so different work hours.

What time do you think small children go to bed?! Most need 11-12hrs sleep so they have to be in bed 7-8 depending on what time they need to be out in the morning.

I always feed my grandchildren at about 5:30 when they are staying here because that is the time they eat at home. Young children eating at around 8 is ridiculous. My husband and I eat when they are in bed.

Id be stunned if that was true - I don’t know what one who has dinner between 5-6pm.

Yeah what are all these people doing who can “model family meals” (which is a horrifically smug term in itself), at 5pm? I’m still at my desk by then! Are they also modelling being unemployed or having a trust fund! Even when my kids were in full time nursery we didn’t pick them up until 6.30 at the earliest (they’d have lunch early, then nap, a snack around 4/5ish and then eat with us at 7, in bed for 8.30 ish).

In most countries it’s very normal for kids to be up a bit later with maybe a snack around 4pm- think France, Spain, Italy. It’s quite a Victorian concept to be feeding kids at 5 and then packing them off to bed. Obviously if it works for you/ your family then that’s fine but you wouldn’t get many European families all eating a big dinner at 5pm (apart from perhaps the Dutch, although I think even they are a bit later) and I think it would be a bit OTT to insist upon it in someone else’s house.

Why do you expect other people to change their meal time but not you?

I recently stayed at my parents house with my 2 and 4 year old, they did early dinner for the kids at around 5 pm and then the adults all ate later. This would be my preference, but I also wouldn't mind kids and adults eating at 6pm (at the latest) to save cooking twice.

Why is it any more unfair than making adults who normally eat at 5pm wait until 9pm?

I suppose that would be unfair too. Though I would have thought it's quite unusual for adults to eat that early. We usually eat around 7.30pm but loads of my friends eat later than that.

Early dinner, early bed.

Simples

Our family meal is generally at 5.30 (we WFH) and when we go to grandparents they kindly make the meal at 6/6.30. Yes 8pm is too late for little kids, unless they're already acclimated to a later schedule. I'm not a huge fan of separate meals for kids and adults but if the host prefers then it's an option. I remember being someone who couldn't fathom eating before 8pm - before I had kids. Now half the time I'm ready for bed then...

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