Witholding my rent AIBU

[littledragon99]

I'm a woman in my late 40s, living in a 3-bed Victorian terrace in West London, where I pay £1,200 a month with all bills included. I signed an AST in May.
I work in recruitment and DJ on the side. Despite being skilled in my job, financial difficulties have arisen following my mother’s death, and I've struggled with timely rent payments. I’m currently in therapy to manage my depression.
Recently, my landlady has begun Airbnb-ing the living room, removing the communal space I was paying for. Given this change, I believe the £1,200 rent is no longer justified.
Additionally, she inappropriately contacted my boss, (my boss was my reference) about paying rent directly and has threatened eviction. I’ve consulted Citizens Advice and suspect my deposit wasn’t placed in a Tenancy Deposit Scheme (TDS), which may breach legal requirements.
Due to these issues, I’ve withheld my rent since August 1st and am prepared to take further action if needed.

Guys... it's OKAY for the OP to take coke instead of facing up to their responsibilities... the other PP did it too!

Tsk.

@GoodLordyTheExcusesWeMakeForThem
You sound like you've had a rough life, but your bitterness/crusading isn't really helping here.

If the op can't managed to set up a DD to pay her rent then I doubt she's going to start a vengeance war against her LL like you did.

Op I have ADHD (like half the posters on this thread it seems!) and the last thing you need is the drama and upset.

Can I ask you one question?

Do you want to stay in this house?

If you do, then email your LL apologising for being tardy with your rent and clarity what is happening re the living room and if it will be permanently rented via air BnB.
Start a conversation.
The LL/Tenant relationship is a business deal. We all want to do business with reasonable honest people.
If you can't afford to buy a house (or don't wish to) then you need to be housed by renting one. Most people can't get social housing, so they need to use the service provided by private landlords.
Take the emotion out of it.

If you don't want to stay in the house (I think maybe you would be better off as a lodger in someone home, it's often quieter and less disruptive and nicer accommodation in general if you can find a decent place)
My DS was renting in a HMO for a decade before she bought a place in her late thirties, it gets tougher as you get older and stay in more and want your home to be a sanctuary rather than a crash pad.

Take care of yourself, use your energy for the things that will serve you. I get very emotional about injustices but that rarely does me any favours!

I've also lost my DM and I understand why you are struggling. Just keep calm and carry on, you need your job, a home and food in your belly as the basics, concentrate on the basics until you are in a better state.

I keep opening this thread expecting a deletion message because this entire situation is so ridiculous and carries on getting more ridiculous with every OP post.

The short term rental market (less than 90 days in any one Callander year) can only be legal if she also is liable for council tax in that property. Which she can’t be due to you and another tenant having ast’s

But the rent includes all bills so the council tax is coming from the LL’s account, and the ast is an ast in an hmo. Which makes a difference in some way - it’s upthread somewhere.

At least she'll have someone to talk to....

@GoodLordyTheExcusesWeMakeForThem

' She could even take over my social housing tenancy after I pass, thereby ensuring a home for life.'

really !

that would not happen down here!!!

You would have to make this woman your legal partner and put her on the tenancy ( thus she would become equally responsible for the rent which she won't pay )

I can give 3 examples

1. Mother ( tenant ) dies, leaving 2 children - approx 17 and 15. Housing Association allowed the eldest to become the tenant and enabled the eldest to care for the youngest. Both girls lived with Mum when Mum moved into the property, thus \mum was allocated the property as she had 2 dependent children.
2. Female moves in her partner, his child lived with him thus he moved the child in too. 5 or so years ago the lady died, Housing Association eventually realised, and the partner had to move out - this took until Easter to sort out. His daughter was by now an adult and living elsewhere.
3. Elderly lady dies, her youngest son - an adult lives with her. Housing association said they could rehome him, but it would not necessarily be in the borough. He moved by choice into a private rental.

All this effort @GoodLordyTheExcusesWeMakeForThem is making to enable a total stranger on the internets to live rent-free in someone else's property whilst spunking her income on a raging cocaine habit at nearly 50 years of age. It'd fair bring a tear to a glass eye.

I hope @littledragon99 DOES move in with her. It's rare you get such synchronicity between two complete strangers and I'm a sucker for a happy ending. 💕

My point was if she can get coke off a dealer she could get ADHD meds. Most dealers are enterprising people who will sell you what you want.

A better idea though would be stop taking drugs, get some help from CAB/Shelter etc on housing and finances, and express to the GP how badly 'ADHD' is affecting her life so hopefully GP can prioritise her for help - even if that takes some time. But I am not convinced this situation is real, hence the daft suggestion above.

Actually this situation is rather textbook for people who have adhd, depression, anxiety and not much of a support network. OP, please stop the coke, it may help in the moment but not long term.

Only not seeking help guarantees no help. And a great deal of your hyperfocus research was incorrect, unfortunately Google doesn't always deliver correct legal information.

But my heart is warmed that OP will be moving in with you, what a lovely outcome to the thread.

The only focus the OP should be encouraged to have right now is on how to avoid eviction. Not how to delay it, or how to get compensation for the lack of or not or her deposit protection. If she gets evicted under the circumstances she’s talking about, she’s going to end up street homeless with a drug problem.

I paid about £350 for mine and got shared care with the GP after settling on my dose, but I suspect you’re on the windup. No one is this stupid.

That's an unlawful eviction and a criminal offense. You can not just throw someone out of an AST with out valid notice and a court order

Please do not with hold your rent , that puts you in a precarious position and also your boss if they are guarantor for you. However contact Shelter as they can advice you on options

Gee I don't know, sounds far too complicated. Much better to carry on as she is as its working out so well so far .....

It is your responsibility to set up reminders for yourself. With modern technology that is easier than ever before.

She's isn't not paying the rent because she forgets. She's not paying it because she can't.

I suppose that's the thing about spending your rent money on class A's whilst you try to make it as a DJ..... do you just party in your room alone with some makeshift decks?!

Honestly your behaviour is cringeworthy and must be horrific for your flatmates/landlady to live with.

Doesn't want to, not can't, I think. The entitlement is strong in this one. But then coke can do that.

Yet finds money for coke and to continue relying on a frankly unreliable source of income.

As a landlady, reading both sides the LL behaviour and the OP’s makes my blood boil. What a nightmare!
on the music business side, I have quite few friends that are djs that have done very well in life, either DJing being their main job or just a side gig, now in their 40s or 50s they all said that there was a moment when they realised if they continued that lifestyle (drugs and alcohol) they would have been dead pretty soon. They all have a good family life but most of them don’t touch drugs anymore and quite few stay away from the alcohol. I also have a friend who continued his coke addiction till his 60s and he’s pretty much homeless, sofa surfing/ living in his car.
OP, if you think cocaine helps you, you know it’s short lived, you go back home and live with your problems through the week. Please try get some help. all the traumatic events you’ve been through must be so hard to process on your own and heal from that trauma. I’m sure the weekends make you forget for few minutes but they’re ruining your life

As I feared, LL has moved back in to her 'living room' this afternoon and already throwing her weight around, she has verbally given me 2 weeks notice.

On the shelter website it says she has had to have been constantly there throughout my tenancy in order for her to do this.

You'll have to leave sooner or later anyway. Can you delay your departure? In all likelihood, yes. But it's probably wise for you to find another place to live ASAP.

Have you paid the rent that is past due?

Nope haven't paid - she can keep my deposit

You better start packing and look for somewhere else to live. You've not paid rent for two months, ask Shelter if she can give you notice now?

Your tenancy ends on 9th September anyway.