to feel quite shocked that DH has PTSD from teaching?

[FunnysInLaJardin]

Its feels pretty awful tbh. He has just today received this diagnosis and has been referred for priority EMDR.

He has taught for 25 years in a secondary school, and got out last year due to clinically diagnosed burn out.

I knew it was bad, but I never realised it was this bad.

How can this be allowed to happen?

As have we, we told the DC again tonight, whatever you do, don't go into teaching! They are 14 and 18 and said they never would

The slight irony is that I come from a family of teachers, mum, aunt, sister and brother in law all taught

I actually think people on the outside often think it's the "unruly" kids whereas for me and for many people it's actually the system (which in turn creates some of this behaviour).

So many things like taking away TAS. Always having more work than you can do, so much micromanaging and pressure on results for each child at a cost to the fun side of learning. The pressure in school every single day is emmense. There is no down time or just checking emails and the pressure every night to do worn to be ready for the next day means it's the equivalent of deadlines every day even to start work.

The system has become unmanageable and has been broke for too long (much like NHS I imagine - overnight waits in A and E have become the norm now it seems 🙁, nurses run off feet all shift, etc).

There isn't enough money in school budgets so they ruthlessly hound out older more experienced staff in favour of cheap nqts...

Behaviour - schools here are becoming stricter thinking this will help but this alientages many neurodiversity children or anxious children or those from tricky home lives and actually pushes them into more challenging behaviour or into not attending school. I know so many families now where kids are not attending. So many where kids aren't getting support they need in school. We don't have enough specialist school places and even then for many who don't cope in these strict schools they don't nec need specialist settings they just need school to accommodate. It used to be a friendly TA could look out for the odd child or two struggling...

Oh there is so much more. And it's hard to explain the pressure. Ive not taught in school for ages as I teach adults and I still get anxiety dreams.

you could consider therapy, sorry you have also been through this, it is brutal

Not surprised but very sorry to hear it. Best wishes for his recovery. I was told recently on trying to get life insurance, that teachers are in an insurance risk group one down from emergency workers because of the physiological consequences of stress.

Oh us too! Family of teachers and we made ours promise (obviously wouldn’t have held them to it if it was their dream) not to go into teaching. Neither boy wanted to after watching me work late into the evening and put up with working conditions. Highly relieved they won’t be, which is so sad.

Teaching has changed an awful lot since I started 25 years ago.

And there's so much more pressure on the kids. It's not enough just to pass or get an A but instead we have 3 types of A. I hear "I'd be okay if I drop down to a 6" when a 6 should be celebrated!

Exams became so much more content heavy with Gove even though the need to memorise in real life had become less with computers..

There is SO much pressure now on kids to constantly perform and constantly be brilliant. And this pressure is intensified for the teachers. We can't just enjoy the learning ride with them anymore.

Schools are toxic places to work and it's such a shame. I'm quite bitter that I don't have a successful career/haven't quite found my new niche financially. I wish I'd made different choices before.

Anyway I'll stop ranting. It's just so so sad. I could predict you'd have a whole army of "not surprised" responses.

Your poor husband. Hope the Wellbeing job goes okay for him. And again hope you are okay. It's hard to keep supporting someone whose struggling so make sure you take time to rest too.

They’ll reap what they sow OP. Sadly it’s a common picture nowadays and will have repercussions for years to come. I feel so sorry for many teachers. In the right circumstances it’s such a fulfilling profession but management and society need to respect and value the role teachers play in children’s lives. Your husband is not alone.

I’m wondering how your dh diagnosed with ptsd from teaching? How does it manifest in your dh? Is it from certain events? General abuse from pupils or management?
Would it be the strain of teaching? Is it different from any other highly stressful job?
Sorry for my million questions-genuinely interested!
Well done for getting out of teaching and into a new career-there’s hope for all of us! (I’m a teacher too).

I’m not surprised either.

Really sorry for your husband. But I'm not surprised at all. Nothing could make me go back to teaching on any level.

I hope he is OK, over his time I wonder what, if anything, has gotten worse from what I know of teaching staff is is the parents rather than the kids that is getting worse

Students behaviour is bad but if parents backed the teachers that may help everyone

Two dses in secondary- told one that the other wouldn’t go to locker or toilets- he said ‘well that’s sensible’. Daily tales of students throwing things at teachers, messing with tools in woodworking, setting things on fire in cookery, cursing and being suspended. And this is the better school in town!! Hope your dh is ok

I’m sorry about your DH.

I’m an ex teacher and am not surprised either.

The whole system is dysfunctional for all involved especially teachers and pupils.

Me too. I also got ill health retirement.

Teaching is a terrible place at the moment.

As the OP stated, it’s the management not really the pupils.

So many of us will have it after many years of teaching and still doing it.

Yes the trauma is there, have any of us actually been diagnosed? No, so your DH's case should be an important case to confirm and help the cause.

It's so good that that PTSD is taking seriously now. My DD was a RC marine, then police, so the things he experienced and saw was beyond what any of us could deal with, but in those days it wasn't recognised or any help offered.

I'm not surprised at all. I work in a primary school. It's a wonderful school.
However, going from a parent to "inside" has been a massive shock for me. Parents are fucking awful, abusive, confrontational and will not accept that their little Johnny is anything other than the messiah. I've recently seen experienced and fantastic teachers just leave because they've had enough. I can't imagine what secondary schools must be like if it's this bad at primary level. I don't honestly know how teaching staff cope yet you have absolutely no idea how hard they work and how intrusive it is to all aspects of their life. I hope your husband gets the support he very truly deserves. I believe him.

I'm really sorry to hear this, OP. Sadly, I'm not surprised, but feel angry on his behalf. I wish your husband well for his recovery and the EMDR. xx

I would have thought PDSD would be more fitting? Prolonged Duress Stress Disorder.

It doesn't surprise me unfortunately. I was stalked and harassed by a pupil when I was a teacher in a secondary school. The school didn't do anything so I went to the police who essentially said that it was to be expected and they shouldn't have to deal with it because (and the following is a direct quote from the policeman who turned up to have a go at me in the school car park) "I'm running an emergency service!" Funnily enough, the child (and by child I mean 16 years old and man-sized) was sent to a new school when he turned his attention the headteacher after I left. The time I had to stand there on bus duty while my colleagues pointedly ignored the pupil screaming obscenities at me out of his bus will never leave me.

I wish your husband a speedy recovery and a positive experience in his new role. I've made a similar move and the pay is awful but I log off at 5pm and walk out of the building without needing to take work home and it is bliss.

I've worked in a call centre where I was shouted at by angry customers for eight hours a day.

And I've Been a teacher.

Being a teacher was worse.

First of all: whoever came up with the bizarre idea that

One adult can control twenty five teenagers.

Was wrong.

One person can never control 25 people.

Teaching is unrealistic.

I don't think that it is being taken more seriously I think the nhs is a massive postcode lottery and it's very dependent on where you live. I hate to say it but also being a male will also always be taken more seriously with these things then women are.

So sad. Expectations keep going up and schools are basically exam factories and have to resolve society issues at the same time. Teachers can not be a magical Jack of all trades that the government expects.

i hope he recovers.

I got out and my DC will deffo not become teachers as a result of watching me put other children first and never them.

@FunnysInLaJardin who actually diagnosed him with PTSD?

Awful isn't it? One of my good friends is a secondary school teacher, and she is honestly hard as nails, never met a stronger or more resilient person. She broke down crying to us on a girl's night recently because of how much she's dreading September. It's a mess.

Wishing your husband all the peace and healing he needs and deserves 💐