Why do so many posters hate mothers/children

[Sundayschool]

Inspired a bit by the current thread on SMP!

Why does Mumsnet, predominately/historically a forum for parents, attract so many posters who seem to hate children and mothers? It surprises me how fast posters are to tear down any women who want better conditions for themselves or their children or indeed anything to make life a bit easier (parent/child spaces, better SMP).

Why do such people choose to post on this site in particular? Surely if you really feel so strongly this is the last place you would think to come and post?

It's almost as if people don't realise that they too were children at some point. Such selfishness.

I don't park in p&c spaces - I do actually think they should be reserved for people who have car seats and prams and wriggly toddlers to keep safe. They need to be wide spaces, near safe paths. If I had a blue badge I wouldn't park in P&C unless absolutely necessary. I do think it's considerate to leave these spaces free for parents with young kids if you possible can.
I wouldn't move seats on a plane to accommodate people who cba to book (and pay for) the seats they need if it meant I was away from my own group or in a worse seat.

While society has a responsibility to keep children from harm, it doesn't have more responsibility than their own parents to pay for them or accommodate their needs.

It's not fair to ask people without children to always work Christmas - it shows no respect or consideration for their lives or families. If you have a job which requires Christmas working, the only way to avoid resentment is to take it in turns. Part of this problem comes about because some parents think that their children should become everyone else's priority too.

I adore my kids and i

Sorry pressed post

I adore my kids and I arranged my life so I could be with them as much as possible. Didn't expect the state to pay me for doing so and didn't think I had a right to other people's plane seats, or to take them to child free weddings or expensive restaurants late at night and let them yell through dinner. Because they were mine to bring up, not everyone else's.

I don’t understand this gripe. I travel with children a lot and every airline I’ve flown has a policy of sitting children under 12 with their accompanying adult at no charge anyway. Because it makes sense for everyone and is a child safeguarding issue.

That works on flights with lots of room but what happens when people have paid extra for specific seats and then you want them to move because you didn't book yours?

What are you talking about? Airlines seat minors with the adult automatically if not booked (which I do anyway). It’s not a matter of wanting anyone to move.

The extra leg room seats are usually next to the doors. I don’t think they permit children to sit there because you have to assist in an emergency, so there’s no prospect of being asked to move from an extra legroom seat for a child.

Have you never seen one of the MN threads or newspaper articles about parents not booking and being separated from their children, then being angry because someone wouldn’t swap seats?

I’ve asked so many times and until I joined MN I didn’t realise how many parents deliberately don’t pay!

The CAA guidelines say parent and child should be seated next to each other but defines that as including a row apart and across the aisle. And they’re guidelines, not rules.

@LewishamMumNow Your post is pretty offensive. Between the vague accusation that some childless people are akin to racists, and the martyrish lecture about how great our lives are because we’re doing none of the work to help society…

I don’t hate parents or children but I do take issue with people who think that once they have children, they’re on a pedestal above those who don’t.

If parents don’t book together the airline will normally rearrange so they are together. That’s an airline policy issue. Otherwise, to all the people who hate mothers and children, have fun sitting next to a toddler that isn’t yours.
😁

Because the site is infiltrated with men, people without kids and not parents and people who just post about you name it, not always family related

the worst is the sheer immorality of some posts

"What are you talking about?" I think you might be that parent @Bellsandthistle

Seriously why do you think people, especially parents, bother to book and pay extra for specific seats? An airline will try to sit you next to your child, but if everyone else on the flight has booked (and paid for) specific seats, you might end up with that not happening. No one would owe it to you to move so you could be next to your child. They might, to be nice. And I would if it didn't inconvenience me, but not if it did.

I do wonder if those parents on planes ever offer to refund the passenger who has moved for them. I suspect rarely, if ever!

So… why all the MN threads and news articles about this happening if it doesn’t happen?

Why was I asked to move so often in my 20s and early 30s, if the airlines can just move everyone around?

@fitzwilliamdarcy I don’t know but you should probably make better airline choices 😌

I have never said anyone owed it to parents to move. I have always booked seats together but have been told by the airlines I fly with that it is automatic, regardless. I would never ask someone to move and have refused to move when asked by other cheeky entitled ppl in the past.
After reading some of the posts by yourself and others on here however, I would get a small thrill out of seeing you stuck next to someone else’s small child.

That’s what noise cancelling headphones are for, surely? Bold assumption that they’re actually going to get disturbed by said small child 🤷🏻‍♀️

If it is the case that some posters hate mothers, I do believe that @Bellsandthistle might be a beautiful illustration as to why.

There are people who go through life assuming they are the major character in everyone else's lives, as well their own and parenthood amplifies this. These will be the people who have child free weddings but kick off if you don't later invite their children, the one's who expect people to give up the plane seats they've paid for so they can sit with their children, despite not having bothered to book and who are completely oblivious to how all that 'rearranging' doesn't just happen by magic and involves people giving things up for their convenience!

I wouldn't actually mind sitting next to someone's small child tbh - kids are usually nice and far less annoying than a lot of adults. And if they aren't, well I have headphones and can take a 'not my circus, not my monkeys' approach

@ABirdsEyeView reading posts before replying is usually recommended, if you are able.

I've read yours. I just don't believe you.

That’s your prerogative. I didn’t believe there could be people with such aggressive hatred for mothers and children, but here we are.

It's not hatred - it's just a belief that children are largely the responsibility of the parents to pay for and look after and that parents aren't a special group whose wishes have to be accommodated as a priority.

I think children are (largely) lovely, they are bright, funny, interesting and it's a joy to watch them discover the world. Society should of course ensure they are safe, have good housing, healthcare and education. But providing for children is something which should largely rest with the parents, not employers or the state.
There are people who have chosen not to have them and those people shouldn't be pressured into paying more tax or working more, so that parents can work less, or giving up Christmas days off or a holiday in August because parents want that time.
People shouldn't be viewed as 'less' because they don't have children or their time viewed as not so valuable.

This. Not being willing to work every Christmas, or give up your plane seat, isn’t ’hatred’ of children or mothers any more than it’s hatred of anyone that may want you to do either of those things, regardless of reason.

@InterIgnis nobody has said you should have to. Stand down.

Lol, as if I haven’t been horizontal this entire time.