What’s pretty these days

[Starsineyes91]

Anybody else confused what counts as pretty/attractive these days.

It’s like you’re only allowed to look natural if you’re very young and naturally pretty.

Its so confusing every woman and her dog is expected to have a face full of filler and be deep orange at all times with obligatory fake black eyelashes.

I think society has forgotten what a natural pleasant face looks like, I see women with barefaced or light make-up being called drug addicts or other nasty slurs, because they have some natural texture and shadows.

Might get me flamed but some of the women doing the shaming of more natural women are plain Jane’s who have paid a lot to look like unattractive transvestites. But so many men will choose them over an attractive natural girl.

Don’t get me started on the obsession with filtered photos. Society has become so toxic for girls and women.

It's quite right that we shouldn't care how a woman chooses to present herself in terms of dress/make-up etc - but we should all care that people are actively insulting each other and judging based on what someone looks like . This thread is a good example .

Because they look stupid.

I do know what you mean OP. That look is so naff but who am I to say at 64? I see it much more in photos and on SM rather than real life. They take a posed, made up face photo for their Wattsapp profile etc. actual "work" is another matter altogether. DD is 21 and only one of her friends goes in for this. She looks amazing but a bit old for her age and has to be careful not to veer into "too plasticky". The others look great too so I can't see why she bothers

Sorry for my ignorance, but does it wear off? I know Botox has lasting effects, but do filled lips eventually go back down to their previous size? Do they get kind of saggy if they do?

It's not my favoured style, but young people have always been doing crazy stuff, from pink hair to body piercings to tattoos.

It only bothers me if people are being pressured to conform, and they might live to regret it.

I don’t go out of my way to judge people on their looks

You literally did that in your OP.

You are allowed to decide for your self what you do and how you look, within the normal law of the lands.

What makes you think otherwise?

Fair enough. I can see why you’d think that, but believe me when I say, I’m talking about a specific type of unpleasant person (they are aplenty) who project their nastiness on to others, whether that’s blatant or passive aggressively. The type who thinks anybody who doesn’t go to the ridiculous lengths they do to fit in are lacking. Who knows maybe they’re are just projecting because they’re jealous some people are comfortable in their own skin.

The short answer is, they don't. Women who favour the sort of look the OP dislikes are not going round insulting and sneering at women who don't and starting threads on mumsnnet accusing them of looking like men. This is entirely one sided, with some members of the 'natural' brigade feeling they have the high ground to belittle other women. Worse still they veil their spite under a pretence of feminism and/or concern. I'd have more respect for the OP if she would just come out and say 'I hate this look and it puts my nose out of joint that some men seem to like it' rather than go round the houses to come at it from this angle.

Who knows maybe they’re are just projecting because they’re jealous some people are comfortable in their own skin.

You might be right. I remember, as an anorexic sixth-former, feeling almost frightened to be seen without makeup. I used to spend ages making myself look something like this - no false eyelashes or filler, but not exactly natural!

Adults used to say things like "It's a shame you feel you need to cover your pretty face with that stuff" .., sound familiar? 😏

I have had a small amount of botox and a very small amount of filler done by a plastic surgeon. His mantra was to make it look natural and he absolutely refused to use huge amounts of filler to lift cheeks etc. He was genuinely puzzled about the fake eyebrow thing. My face does move. My lips are the size they always were and are all my own along with my natural eyebrows.

I just look like a slightly better version of myself. I don't wear heaps of makeup or lashings of fake tan. So not all people who dabble a bit in botox and filler look to have very obvious work. I suspect people think I am extremely natural with minimal makeup, pale skin and very casual hair.

Nobody is forcing me to do it. My husband doesn't care if I do this or not. My boss doesn't care. Obviously you do.

One thing that most people consider pretty/attractive in a person is a bright sunny disposition. 🙂

These threads are always the same.

I find it really sad that people are happy to bring each other down the way they do on threads like these.

Where do you live? I don’t know anyone who looks the way you describe or who thinks that’s the key to being attractive. I’m also not aware of any men who want/think women should look like that. You see some people who look like that in London but they’re by far a minority and definitely not what ‘most’ people aspire to look like. I guess that could be different in other regions?

It all depends on personal taste surely. I look at some women and think they are beautiful, others may not. As has been said, we are much more than our looks.

Might get me flamed but some of the women doing the shaming of more natural women are plain Jane’s who have paid a lot to look like unattractive transvestites. But so many men will choose them over an attractive natural girl

Maybe they choose them because they’re not absolutely brimming with bitterness and judgement like your good self

I think you are spot on 👏
I haven't read the other comments on purpose, because I think you put it perfectly!

apart from the internalised misogyny your views on what is fashionable are outdated, OP.

The super glam, tattooed eyebrows and contour, high heels and body-con dresses Kardashian look has been out for a while now.

All the current insta/tiktok trends now are 'natural' (still lots of makeup tbh but the intention is to look like they aren't wearing it!) dewy face, glow, wearing trainers on nights out, loose fit jeans, going to the gym, health focus.

Which is not to say that everyone follows that, just like millions of women didn't follow the previous trend.

Is it just the single mums and shop girls you've singled out? Classist as well as misogynistic?

Wrong ! not jealous of the look or of the attention from men (you’re assuming a lot about my sexuality there)

I have observed some subtle work and it does look good when women pay a bit more and don’t over do it.

I really don’t care what men find attractive it was just an observation that has me bemused, considering you constantly hear men saying they like natural women, but they shame their partners when they don’t wear makeup.

The overdone women they claim look crass are the very women they secretly watch in porn or stray to. You read it on here all the time.

I don’t sneer at women who enjoy this image (good for them) what I do object to is being criticised (by a proportion) of them. Whether that be for daring to show my natural shade of white skin on a summers day or for not having big bulbous obvious fake lips or actually being called ugly for being un-enhanced. I’ll carry on with my normal makeup, hair dye etc but that’s shameful in its self to high maintenance women.

You don’t have to be in the same circle of these types just in public and listening vicinity.

You assume a lot by the way.

No I’m stating that you don’t need to be in a high earning bracket or come from privilege to aspire to this look/trend. I’ve watched both made in Chelsea and the only way is Essex in the past, the latter cast were originally seen as the high maintenance women, but now I’ve noticed MIC are going for the look, it’s creeped in all walks of life.

I didn't say you were jealous, nor did I say anything about your sexuality. I said you were spiteful, which you are, that you are sneering and that you're put out that some men like the look. All of which is perfectly clear from the words you wrote, and language used, so no point in back tracking now. If some women have been unkind to you, I'm sorry to hear that. But you must realise how ridiculous you're being to not only frame this as a pattern of behaviour linked to their appearance, but also to think you're any better when you refer to women as 'transvestites' in retaliation.

Here you are being spiteful to me because you don’t like how I made a spiteful comment on the internet about spiteful women who make spiteful comments to me or others for shallow spiteful reasons.

You see how that works ?

The only difference is nothing of what I said was personally directed towards you, so god knows what your own reaction would be if you were on the receiving end of direct, nasty and personal comments from women like that.

Lyricallie · Yesterday 22:28
Literally don’t hang out with anyone who thinks that. Maybe you need to speak to nicer people.

This is probably good advice, OP.

Of course, you'll have to find some nicer people who want to hang out with you.

I have known a few people who change their nose, lips, veneers, bbl or Botox then start making nasty comments about people who have their own original features.

But on the whole it’s just an observation about people, usually they are just in my vicinity/public at the time, sneering laughing and judging people who don’t worship fakery.

I'm not being spiteful to you. You decided to post unpleasant mysogynistic comments on a public forum. I'm commenting on what you have chosen to reveal of your personality by doing so, not what you look like, which is the least important thing about any of us imo. Do you see the difference?