To not want partner's friends/family in my home

[bubbly07]

So me and my partner have our own separate place, I live in a house and he lives in a flat in a tower block.

The main reason we don't have our own place together is because he refuses to give up his flat which he has had for over 15 years and it is rented through the council.
He will only do this when we are able to purchase a property in both our names.

Anyway I have just moved into a house through HA on a market rent scheme and he is now trying to invite his friends and family over which I really have an issue with and it starting to grate on me.

He is acting as if it his home despite having his own flat.

I have never been invited to any of his friends houses and one of his cousins has been rude to me in the past.

I don't want these people in my home.
I love my privacy and have never been the one to have social gatherings in my home.
.
His brother does not allow people in his home as he also likes his privacy and now all of a sudden my partner is wanting to invite him and his partner over for dinner.

I don't think I am being unreasonable but my partner is making me feel very bad about this.
I have never had my friends/family at his flat.

I have told him they will just have to visit him him in his own flat as my home is not a social club.
I barely know some of these people.

AIBU?

You certainly don’t need to have his friends family over!! Very very strange demand, especially when he has a 2 bedroom.

and maybe time to re-examine this relationship. It’s been five years, so you want to spend the rest of your life with this person? He doesn’t sound all that into it. Being single sucks, be trapped in a relationship where you aren’t valued is worse. Much worse. Consider if you wanted kids, so you want them to have his traits? Do you want them growing up seeing how he treats you and think that’s ok? If you don’t want kids then less of a rush, but someone better might be out there.

If this is the only oddity, then no he can’t have his friends to your place, weird he would even ask.

YANBU and you don’t want to move in to a shared home together or you will have no say about who he invites. You say that will be ok, but you like your privacy so which is it?

YANBU. And get rid of this loser bloke.

Well. Hen isn’t wrong that he would be absolutely mad to give up a social housing tenancy if he has any prospect of ever excercising right to but it right to acquire or in fact any worry about his long term security of tenure/ having a place to live.

The wanting all his friends over to your place though is downright weird. They can go to his or meet on neutral public trriority surely? It sounds a bit like he is trying to leverage your propert for his own gain whilst keeping his two bedder all to himself.

*he not hen

Why are you wasting your time with this user?

He wants to use you and your home and commit fraud too.

He sounds like scum.
You deserve better.

How was a 2 bedroom flat given to him in error? If he wanted to fraudulently let his flat out while living at your place then in fairness you probably have a far bigger problem here than just not liking his friends.