Am I mad to consider this with a newborn?

[Planningatrip]

We’re wondering if it’s going to be feasible to go up to Scotland to see family this Christmas, and make a little weekend out of it perhaps and potter round the Christmas markets. If we did this we would be staying in a hotel/AirBnb for 2 or 3 nights and so would need to drive up in order to fit our pram and travel cot in. It’s a 3 hour drive, so we’d obviously have to stop several times.

Our baby could be anywhere between 5 and 8 weeks old, depending on when she’s born.

Naively I’m thinking this could actually be the easiest age. Yes we’ll be tired, but we’ll be tired wherever we are. Planning on breastfeeding so hopefully shouldn’t have to worry about bottles and the likes.

AIBU to think about it? Do I need a reality check?

I agree with others that I would look into taking the train (make sure to get an extra seat) BUT would want to either rent a car or borrow one from a relative for the duration of the stay. I wouldn't want to be depending on local public transport or cobbled together lifts from family through the stay.

The second month was about the time I was really going stir crazy and getting out was vital for my mental health, so it was worth some work for me. Every family (by which I mean mother, baby, second parent, and other family support) is different in both the value of getting away from home and the amount of struggle it will be, so include flexibility in any plans and manage everyone's expectations.

I wouldn’t.

It’s entirely possible you’ll have a magical birth and an easy baby from day one. But in the event you don’t having to cancel everything and manage people’s expectations if just a load of stress you absolutely don’t need.

Did you have a lie flat car seat/carrycot?
Many on here must be ignoring safe sleeping/travelling.
People having colds etc could be an issue. The Christmas markets sound ok, until you get people carrying hot drinks/alcohol over the pram. A sling would work unless the temperature drops too low, I've touched unlucky and it's been -5 in November. Visiting and not having to worry about cleaning and cooking would be great if you can make the other bits work. A three hour drive means at least six stops without a lie flat seat to allow the baby's oxygen levels to recover.

So many variables - it's impossible to predict. Wait and see how you're both doing post birth and think about booking then. No need to book so early.

Our baby hated the car for quite a long time, constant screaming is hard to take especially if you are the driver! Newborn baby crying especially evokes a kind of visceral stress reaction which doesn't go well with concentrating on driving!

Agree depends on good health all round.. also I’d be sure to have medical info to hand as at that age there’s quite a lot of guessing. If everything goes fine at birth and feeding etc then fine but if you have any issues it would be tricky at best. I wouldn’t commit!

I’d just wait and see how you feel, you’ll easily be able to book accommodation. Personally I’d fly or take the train, as the car trip sounds the most arduous bit. Most hotels will be able to give you something for baby to sleep in, or just cosleep for those nights (put partner on sofa bed if needed). We were kn holiday recently in Greece and there was a couple there with a 6 week old (god knows how they got the passport)so some people certainly don’t find travelling with baby tricky

My newborn shrieked blue murder after ten minutes in the car. Every time. A 20 minute drive was hideous . I wouldn’t have done it. Depends on your newborn

If you are going to book anything, I'd make sure you have late cancellation options.

A train should be fine btw

Personally I’d keep an open mind and see how you go. If you have an easy delivery and you heal well, baby feeds well at then do it (yes lots of stops, yes you’ll have a car full of gear). With my first we traveled to a wedding when she was 5 weeks. With my second I had an emergency c section 7 weeks early, he was very poorly for a long time and I could barely dress myself let alone pack for a trip away! So it really just depends how things go for you! Can you get something with free cancellation?

6 stops? Depends on which NHS trust you read the info from. SOME say 30 mins and others say 2 hours.

I personally don't know anyone who has stopped every bloody 30 mins to disturb a baby

Honestly, that sounds lovely. Newborn babies are very straightforward IMO in terms of needs, and it's a very special magical time. There's no schedule/naptime and your baby will just be happy to be on you in a sling or in a pram. Would imagine absolutely lovely memories.

The thing I would consider though is, is everything gonna go to plan. If you have a straightforward birth you'll be up and about by then, but if not, then you may need further rest and travel may absolutely be on the cards. How much would you definitely need to spend before you have to go, like paying for accommodation etc? That would be my main consideration, not so much the trip itself.

Sure why not? And why would you have to stop? Your baby will probably sleep through most of the drive.
I flew to Spain with my son when he was six weeks. No issues.

I've had 3 kids. All very different. However ALL had 2 really bad crying weeks week 5/6. I think if you look it up, week 6 is the week a baby cries and cluster feeds most. So honestly, I'd possibly book, refundable and make a last-minute decision. My first child would have been fine and we did do a 2.5 hour journey stopping several times.

You just won't know until the baby comes. You won't know if the baby sleeps through or cries a lot or whatever. I would take a chance and book but check the cancellation policy just in case you decide it's going to be too much.

Depends on you and your baby but I would've been fine. I took my firstborn camping when he was a month old and did many weekends away before he was 6 months. My new baby is 8 weeks old and weve just done a glamping pod for a few days with no issues whatsoever. Then again I've seen other mums who have had such a rough time they haven't really left the house for weeks after the birth. There's no way to tell which camp you'll fall into so whatever you choose, make sure it's either quite cheap or refundable!

Oh god! You’ve just given me flashbacks to the dreaded “witching hour”

We’ve done longer than 3 hours with twin babies. They sleep a lot when little so a good time to travel. One of us sat in the back between the babies to make sure they were ok. Much more difficult when they became toddlers.

It's doable but depends on how well you are and baby's temperament. For example I could have done it with DD1 but couldn't have done it with DD2 (she was still suffering with colic at that age) or DS due to how ill I was after the birth.
So like others book it but only if you can cancel it if you need to.

We did a similar journey with a 2 year old and a 6 week old, after I had a CS. It was fine! I'd suggest an Air BnB rather than a hotel.

Everyone has a different birth/post birth experience and personality of baby. We went away with ours at 8 weeks (100 year old sick great grandparent 6 hour flight away). It was completely fine. Make sure it is able to be cancelled just in case, but babies that young are generally pretty easy to travel with (6 months to 18 months was utter hell in our experience). Check with your midwife that they will have had their injections by that age where you are. I woudn't rush onto a train in winter (likely peak flu/covid) season with a newborn if they don't have some jabs. For that reason i'd drive and just take stops along the way.

I would have been fine. We went to Center Parcs with a 7 week old, 1 year old and 3 year old. But it all depends on the birth you have and how you and baby are doing afterwards. I would book it but make sure you have cancellation with no fees payable, in case you decide a week or two before hand that you don’t think it will work.

We did a 4 hour train journey with 3 changes when my daughter was around 4 weeks. The pandemic was just starting and we were anticipating a lockdown, so we decided to hole up at my parents' house where we'd have support, a garden, more space and a more rural location with fewer people.

If you remember, it was a warm spring, we were on a completely empty train, and my parents had most of the "stuff" we needed waiting for us at the other end, and we also knew that once we got there we'd be there for a long time, and it was still really stressful. We ended up leaving the bag which contained all our electronics on a train after a panic when we arrived at our stop when DD was mid-feed.

You can't leave a bag in your car and never get it back, but also you can't feed a baby or change a nappy on the backseat of a moving car, you have to find a place to stop (with baby crying the whole time) every time the baby needs you, which could be every 15 minutes if they happen to be cluster feeding. And then by the time you've arrived and recovered from the journey, you've got to go back again.

I think it's a lot. It's not impossible but I think it will be more of a slog than a festive jaunt.

We did similar with a 5 week old and it was fine... if you have an okay birth, are breastfeeding and have a healthy baby then there's no reason not to (and it can be quite nice). Can be easier at this age than when they are older. The trick is to take everything slowly and not push yourself or have any fixed deadlines - give yourself the choice to take things very easy if you want to. And think about safe sleep - I remember getting very stressed over a travel cot and a secondhand mattress, but when they're tiny taking your own pop up moses works well I think?