She turned her nose up at my joint camping meal, then added her own stuff!

[MerchantGourmetLover]

On our camping trip with friends we decided that each night one family cooks a meal to feed everyone. I got allocated the final night, so a bit more difficult in terms of bringing fresh stuff from home as it won't last.

My friend got allocated the first night and presented a home cooked chilli using all these organic ingredients picked from a local allotment. She also made some pointed comments about how she is trying to reduce her consumption of ultra processed foods.

To make life easier, for my meal (which to be fair was similar to hers) I used some packets of Merchant Gourmet cajun beans and Mexican grains - which I happen to think are really nice. As soon as I mentioned this she started quietly grumbling about UPFs and I overheard her describe it to someone else as "slop from packets". I tried to ignore and rise above it, but at the moment I served up my meal to everyone, she popped up with a load of extra stuff (of course from the organic allotment) which she claimed was "just some sides to add to your meal", but she then proceeded to only eat her stuff and ignored everything I had cooked.

She has form for this as something similar happened last year! Should I have tried harder with my offering or AIBU to be upset that she was rude about my meal in front of everyone else?

Sorry, I've just reread your post & that you were holidaying with "friends" not camping.

That was very rude of them to take without providing also!

That's really rude, and the food you mention is barely even a UPF.

I just checked the ingredients and it's very minimal on the nasty additives/ chemicals.

She sounds ignorant and stuck up.

I would just ignore. Let her just eat her own stuff if she wants.

The only bit that’s really bad os the saying “slop from packets” about the grains etc, but I’m sure the friend saw her as the idiot she is for saying this.

Agree to cook separately in future. Rise above it.

What a cow!

FWIW one of the best camping meals I’ve ever had (cooked by a friend of my then husband’s who I wasn’t particularly keen on!) comprised tinned stewing steak in gravy, drained tinned baby potatoes, carrots and peas all heated together to make a stew and served with doorstops of fresh crusty bread and butter and lashing of home brewed cider.

It was fucking magnificent!

This, this and buckets of this.

Calling the food slop is not nice so she shouldn’t have done that. However, I can’t really eat UPFs without getting an adverse reaction in my gut so I probably wouldn’t have dared trying the food either and I would have made my own. I know that there are worse UPFs out there than what OP had brought but I just never know which I will react to and having stomach cramps around friends wouldn’t be nice. If I eat very clean food I don’t have any issues at all so it’s a safe bet and I just need to listen to my body. It could be that she’s the same but is embarrassed to speak about it. Many are.

She's rude and not a friend , you made a good meal it's not like you gave everyone a tin of cold baked beans and several spoons!

She is either very unkind and not a friend or has some sort of health anxiety/eating disorder and is basically having a panic attack. If this is her usual character then I’d assume the former and distance myself in a dignified way! If the later I’d find a good time to talk to her privately about my concerns.

So you didn’t actually go on a holiday with friends then….cos no friend of mine would do such a twattish thing

i would’ve given everyone hot dogs 🤣 and not the nice sausage kind but the giant frankfurter kind 🤣

What a rude cow!

Rubbish - if someone is rude enough t call another person's food "slop", then they would have no qualms letting all and sundry know about an adverse gut reaction.

Why do so many posters make excuses for rude people and give their own personal anecdotes which add nothing to the thread

Apologies for the long comment but I hope it's worth it:

There was a TV programme about 20 years ago called (I think) "Holiday Swap". Two families went on holiday together. One week on family A's ideal holiday, one week on family B's. Of course, it was designed for maximum difference and possible tension and conflict. That's the nature of reality TV.

One week, family A was a working-class couple and family B was a couple of very middle-class psychologists, both with their kids. The working-class couple's ideal holiday was staying in a caravan park in Essex and stock-car racing during the day. The psychologists moaned a lot, notably about WC DW "using tinned food".

Anyway, around day 5, the parents came back from the pub to find that the kids had been acting up (the kids seemed to get on fine together). WC DH shouted at them. At this point the MC couple pulled out of the show. Just picked up their kids and drove off.

This was a problem for the producers, as they had 5 days worth of filming in the can, and the MC couple made it clear they were not going to go on holiday with the "dreadful" WC family. In the end, they decided to go ahead with filming. So WC family went on MC family's ideal holiday, which was camel trekking in Morocco, on their own.

They had an amazing time. A total epiphany. By the end of the week they were crying at having to leave these incredible gentle people who had accompanied them.

One morning, they woke in the desert and DW saw one of the guides burying the remnants from the previous night's meal. She walked over and found empty cans of tomatoes and chick peas. She picked them up, looked at the camera, and shouted "Look! Tinned food! You hypocritical bastards!". It was one of the finest moments of television I have ever seen.

Footnote: The idea of the show was that a month after the end of the holiday, regardless of how they had got on, the families would meet up for a drink to reminisce a bit, perhaps apologise if there had been some friction, etc. The psychologist couple refused to come and did it by video link. I don't know what "flavour" of psychologists they were, but they clearly had a few problems around people.

Merchant Gourmet isn't ultra processed. "Ultra processed" means you couldn't recreate it in your own kitchen - pulses with tomato and spices are pretty easy to recreate.

www.gloucestershirelive.co.uk/news/health/professor-tim-spectors-everyday-simple-9321351 www.gloucestershirelive.co.uk/news/health/professor-tim-spectors-everyday-simple-9321351]]]]

It is a processed food, as are for example fresh butter and cheese. I bet she doesn't avoid those...

I’d like to know what everyone else made and if their meals were acceptable to her non UPF requirements.

I agree. Totally reasonable to bring and eat her own food due to her own preferences.

Totally unreasonable, unnecessary and very rude to refer to your food as slip or say anything about it to anyone else who was camping.

She should have quietly and discreetly eaten her own food because that is her preference, and she should have every right and no awkwardness in doing so IF she is not rude about it.

Rude bitch. No more joint meals, no more joint holidays with such a horrible cow, frankly.

What an absolute dose. If this is the case she should have stated she has reactions to many foods and just made it clear she would be cooking for herself during the trip. If she had done this there would be no issue. Instead she made very rude comments about the food which is way more embarrassing.
I don’t know if I would end the friendship entirely but I certainly wouldn’t be cooking for her again. Or I’d make a few rude comments the next time she cooks. Petty I know but maybe a taste of her own medicine would teach her a lesson.

I didn’t excuse her rudeness, I said that she shouldn’t have said and that it wasn’t nice. My reason for not eating UPFs can add something to the thread as I am not the only person in the world whose body can’t handle UPFs, it’s actually quite common but a lot of people don’t know that’s why they react badly to certain foods.

It’s OK to add a different perspective to a thread and not just join in on the friend bashing. Not blindly agreeing with everyone else doesn’t mean I’m not adding anything even if you don’t appreciate my view.

So her organic allotment pickings managed to stay fresh until the very last night of a camping trip, in a week with hot weather, but yours couldn't, and there's no way you could get to a supermarket in all the time you've been on holiday?

Your friend sounds rude, but I'd not be impressed with your effort either. And my husband would be appalled. 😂

I remember a thread almost identical to this, from years ago. Two families on holiday, on couple had served up something like steak au poivre and some nice accoutrements, and the second couple plonked some pasta tossed in ready-made pesto on the table. The first couple were appalled and did not consider this to even be a complete, proper dinner. 😂

I thought you were going to say you did tinned hotdogs or something like that. In future just do meals for your own family & just meet up for drinks & nibbles.

Good grief. On the only night I have ever spent under canvas we had lukewarm tinned beefburgers.

Just had a look and puzzled why she’d think that it was UPF.

I’m puzzled why she’d do something like this with you- she clearly has different expectations than you’ll never meet.

She was rude but I'd be disappointed to be served reheated packet stuff. It's fine if you'd been slaving over the cooker all week but you only had to cook once!

Surely the point was for everyone to make an decent effort once and everyone eat well every night.

I'm interested to know what you served with the grains if she had to get her own sides and what everyone else served the other nights.