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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

SIL - rude?

12 replies

Ten2ten · 05/08/2024 23:12

On a family holiday with my in-laws which I find really difficult anyway. My SIL described someone she met by saying ‘she moaned so much, she was like you on steroids’. I pointed out that it was rude and my DH said the same and she just laughed. My DH wanted to speak to her after again on my behalf to say she was rude to me but I hate confrontation and wouldn’t want to cause an issue with his family. I’m really annoyed, especially as I try to be positive and happy with the in-laws so I think it’s unjusified. Am I being unreasonable to be upset?

OP posts:
Dotto · 05/08/2024 23:17

Yabu if it was a joke and you have this kind of relationship. Yanbu if it wasn't a joke and she dislikes you.

Restinggoddess · 05/08/2024 23:21

She’s jealous of you - but your DH is having a word, so let it go. Recognise her immaturity and her issues and ignore. Be the bigger person.

Twistingskies · 05/08/2024 23:25

I would have just laughed it off and thought she was rude.

I wouldn’t discourage your DH from having a word with her, its good that he wants to.

HamHands · 05/08/2024 23:44

I mean...you are coming on here to have a moan 😆.

I'd just let it slide personally. Unless you see her very often and you think she's likely to see it as a green card to say similar things in the future.

Turophilic · 05/08/2024 23:54

Just laugh it off.

You describe being on holiday with them as difficult, so it's clear you're not having a great time, and you're having a wee moan here (as we all do) so I'd accept that you come across to them as a bit negative and not worry about it any further.

We can't all like everyone.

Chichimcgee · 05/08/2024 23:57

I would have laughed it off, I think getting mardy and you and dh telling her she's rude and then coming on here - maybe you do moan a bit? It's not nice but it does sound like a joke.

jugglesandspins · 06/08/2024 07:33

Depends if she’s always rude to you / making sly digs.

I’ve gone NC with my SIL after Christmas after she insulted my family and going NC was in the context of mr telling myself enough was enough and I wasn’t prepared to put up with her constant digs and comments. This was over a period of 5 years of rudeness towards me.

TheBerry · 09/08/2024 19:42

Do u moan a lot tho.

Julimia · 09/08/2024 19:53

No not rude.... but very funny !!

Ps. Truth usually hurts !!!

Bellaboo01 · 09/08/2024 20:12

Ten2ten · 05/08/2024 23:12

On a family holiday with my in-laws which I find really difficult anyway. My SIL described someone she met by saying ‘she moaned so much, she was like you on steroids’. I pointed out that it was rude and my DH said the same and she just laughed. My DH wanted to speak to her after again on my behalf to say she was rude to me but I hate confrontation and wouldn’t want to cause an issue with his family. I’m really annoyed, especially as I try to be positive and happy with the in-laws so I think it’s unjusified. Am I being unreasonable to be upset?

I assume you moan a lot then!!

That was rude of her to say but, i am sure she was just trying to be a little bit funny.

You are now moaning about her saying that you were moaning!!

MILLYmo0se · 10/08/2024 11:39

'funny how you seem to have that effect on people SIL'

Cherrysoup · 10/08/2024 12:14

I’d have let Dh speak to her. Don’t spend time with her again, whose idea was the holiday?

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