To ignore my three year old daughter when she says she’s a boy?

[Bullbreedbliss]

How do I approach this? Do I ignore? If I say she’s a girl she just argues with me. Am I doing damage by dismissing her?

You're not dismissing her, you're correcting her.

Don't make a big deal out of it ,- she's 3, tomorrow she'll be a dinosaur, Tuesday she'll be a mountaineer, weds she'll be an astronaut

I’d just ignore her. Say ‘that’s cool’ then change the subject.

My 3 year old tells people he's 9! I just laugh. It's no different. Just don't make a big deal out of it or she will do it more to wind you up.

When my DS was 3 he loved wearing sparkly tutus and telling us he was the best girl ballerina 😊. By four he was onto something else. We would just say "Oh, lovely, show us a twirl" like we would for any other passing interest. Don't turn it into something it's not, lots of little ones like playing roles.

Lots of books about dinosaurs and Dora the Explorer.

As above, she'll be saying she's a triceratops or Dora by next week.

She's 3, just tell her she's a girl. When DD was 3 she was saying that when she grows up she was going to grow a willy.

Ignore mostly but also
Perhaps try and work
work out why
Without her noticing
Make sure you are not making girlie expectations

And why is this formatted like a poem

I think at this age I'd just ignore. "Yes darling, you can be whatever you like". At that age I often pretended to be a fairy that was being fostered by humans! You don't need to argue with her about it, or affirm it either.

My trans friends say they started to feeling they were the other sex at around 6 - 8 years old.

She’s just playing with words and ideas. My daughter was very similar at that age. She’s 12 now and very happy as a girl.
Id not make a big thing of it. Be playful. When she says ‘I’m a boy’ say ‘ooh fun, I’m a cat’ and pretend to be a cat.
Maybe ask her ‘what makes you a boy?’ If she is insisting. Maybe someone at nursery has been saying ‘only boys like superheroes’ or something.

My DD was a boy called James for about three months. I just went with it. She was a cat for a few days, tried being a rabbit, found the jumping too tiring.

My son (5) says he plays for England. When he was about 3 he used to tell me he was moonlighting builder (apparently got out of bed and built houses when we slept). He used to point out houses he’d say he’d built.

Change the context and it’s totally normal and nothing to get excited about. Your daughter is too young to understand the significance of what she’s saying. Don’t make nothing into something by your reaction.

When my eldest was 3 we all had covid in turn and were stuck at home for 19 days. DD was a dog for the entire 19 days. She called me owner. For 19 days, she called me Owner.

Just blithely go along with it, she'll move on to something else soon.

Of course you're not doing damage. In the same way if you said no you're not a hamster it wouldn't cause any damage

One of mine was a seagull for quite some time so I wouldn't worry!

When I was three, I thought I was a cat.

Just let her get on with it. It's normal.

Don't ignore her.

Talk to her. Why does she think that?

Chances are that someone sexist has told her that little girls do thing A and boys do thing B so she reckons that if she wants to thing B she must be a boy.

Obviously it's all a big lie and of course girls can do thing B.

It's never too early to teach your daughter to recognise and reject sexism.

The only things girls can't do are things that can only be done with a willy, and really a 3yo is too young to want to do anything in that category!

My son wanted to grow up to be a lady and was horrified when I said boys grow into men! Got over it and grew up I to the most chilled, relaxed man I know!

My son always said he wanted to be a girl when he was that age - for a good year or so. But it turned out he just wanted to learn ballet and he thought he had to be a girl to do that. I always used to say "you can't be a girl, because you're a boy, but you can do everything a girl can do, except have a baby" which he thought was hilarious.

I wouldn't bother arguing with her. It's just a developmental stage. DD at that age insisted on wearing her big brother's cast-off clothes and calling herself 'mini-ds'. We said 'Oh that's lovely dear' and waited for the next thing to come along, which it very quickly did.

DD was a boy for a while - well, she called it being A Brother because boys were Brothers and girls were Cousins. (when she was born DS2 asked why she wasn't a cousin because all girls were cousins - lots of girls on both sides of the family, we had the only lads)

She wanted to be A Brother because they were bigger and could stay up later and sleep on the top bunk. The she realised where the true power lay and declared herself A Mummy - person who sets bedtimes and allocates beds.

DS2 was a cat for 8 weeks, then a squirrel, then Captain America across the same age. The cat stage was a pain, his hands were uterly filthy.

Don't fret it, OP. She'll be a million things between here and adulthood.

When I was 6 I desperately wanted to be a boy, my parents didn’t bat an eyelid.

Don't make an issue out of it. As PPs have said, next week she'll be a cat or a dolphin. She's using her imagination, as 3-year-olds are meant to do.

DS was the same aged 4/5.

I asked him why. He told me that girls don’t get into trouble as often as boys do, and that he really wanted a witches outfit and a Minnie Mouse bag. I told him he could have those: ordered them from Amazon and he was happy as Larry. Never asked to be a girl again

Lots of examples here and similar to my own DS loved Elsa from Frozen and was wanted to be like her when he grew up. Now he says we are lying that he ever did that. He's mortified!
However be careful in how you approach it if it continues because my DD's friend decided at 5 she wanted to be a wolf. Parents allowed it. It was cute at 5 but now at nearly 10 is getting creepy. She dresses as wolf everywhere outside of school. I mean everywhere even soccer practice. She's in counselling but refuses to back down from the fact she is a wolf. She makes such realistic sounds etc that dogs are intrigued by her. This is a different scenario but just an example, I think had her parents not indulged this at 5 as 'just a phase' they wouldn't be where they are now...