do you and DH share your locations on your phones?

[buggeroo]

just curious really. DH and I have never done this, and I wondered if that is the norm?

I was against this years ago but now we share our locations. Makes it easier for him to start the dinner etc

I have nothing to hide & so does he

I don’t randomly check it to make sure he goes where he says he goes

We use life360, I do a lot of walking and running by myself feels nicer someone knowing where you are. Also handy for when you're leaving work etc

Are people aware that it is straightforward to spoof your location on an android and, while slightly more work, also entirely doable on an iPhone?

Fuck no

We do, we find it useful but neither of us are controlling or use it in a way that causes the other any distress. I'm under no illusion that by tracking someone's phone you can guarantee they won't do something like cheat as there's always ways around it if they were that way inclined anyway.

if it makes you feel uncomfortable then of course don't do it and if a partner insists you do against your wishes then that's obviously a huge red flag.

we've been together 10 years it's never causes us any issues, I think we decided to start sharing our location about 5 years ago after we watched a show where someone went missing and died but if they'd been found earlier would have survived. If my partner ever started using it in a way that was trying to control me or I felt uncomfortable I'd definitely stop.

I tell him where I'm going and when anyway (we have a small child) so I don't see the difference him being to see where I am.

I think there’s a difference between both parties having location switched on by mutual consent and an abusive monitoring situation.

In a previous relationship, my exDP made a big point of insisting my location was on and checking it then cross checking for inconsistencies from what I told him. This is clearly an abusive use of the technology.

DH and I have location on, partly because as I mentioned, I’m often a lone worker in a potentially risky situation but also for convenience in terms of food prep and station pickup.

*People are saying they don’t keep checking the app but then say they use it so they can have dinner ready for when their DH returns.

They must need to regularly check it so they can time it just right.
So many people stay a bit later at work or stop off at a shop or for a drink etc.
So how would they know what time to have dinner ready for, unless they’re regularly checking the app.

These men either finish around the same time everyday - in which case the dinner can be made for the same time every day, unless told otherwise.
Or these men finish different times everyday (or do something on the way home) and so these posters must regularly check the app, which they’re claiming they don’t do.

Surely it’s easier for their DH to text them saying they are leaving and will be home around X time, than have their DWs need to keep checking the app.

If heaven forbid the poor man is stuck in traffic, then his doting wife can just reheat it for him when he finally gets home.*

I'll answer some of your questions but I imagine they will just enrage you even more as you do seem quite het up about it.

The app can be set to send a text when you leave an area. You don't need to look at the app at all.

If you were going to stop off for a drink on the way home, that would be a good day to tell your husband or wife what your plans are. I've never stopped off for a drink on the way home from work but if I did I'd tell dh.

I don't want to inform my husband every day when I'm leaving work or what time I'll be home. I find it more convenient to just communicate about stuff like that if it's an anomaly.

Neither dh or I have the dinner on the table when the other arrives home. Sometimes we will eat about six and other days it can be ten.

We don't reheat each others food if they get stuck in traffic. And not just because we've got a warming drawer and I walk but because we are adults who manage.

Doesn't really matter what anyone else does, you do what makes you feel comfortable. Your dh should too.

There will be people on either side of the trust / control fence. Pick your own side.

I guarantee that there are people that have posted on the thread stating that it helps for getting dinner ready who are either checking regularly through the day or being checked up on.
What happens when you check and the dot doesn’t move? Let’s hope they’re not ‘working late’.

I don't think your guarantee is worth the paper it's written on.

No it’s the biggest form of control ever. It’s weird, it disgusts me.

We’ve enabled the iphone family so we can see where each other are or find each other’s phones - I’ve added my mum on too but to be honest I don’t think any of us have ever checked it, it’s more a safety thing.

My partner and I also share passwords for phones, laptops but never check each others stuff.

If location is is shared mutually, who is controlling who?

yes we do! we also share 360
with the kids 😀

its never mutual.. someone doesn’t trust someone else. I just don’t get it.. why do you need to know where your partner is unless you don’t trust them and if so then it’s not a good relationship

To those saying 'if you've nothing to hide, what's the problem?' Should read Dave Eggar's book The Circle. It is not a perfect book but is excellent and thought-provoking on darker side of the 'always on, always monitored, always transparent' school of thought. We are already prisoner enough of our phones without allowing them to enable us to be tracked by ANYONE - yes even the people we love - or indeed to track other people. The thought of tracking an adult child I find especially creepy and inappropriate and I would seriously worry about my child's independence and life skills if they agreed to it, or worse, sought it.

No but then it's never come up, we just text each other if we need to know something
In 100 years when my son is old enough to have a phone I'd want to though

Maybe I'm reading too much into it but an abnormally large proportion of the proponents and enthusuasts for this on this thread are very free with their laughing and smiling emoji when explaining why they think it's such a good idea. I'm imagining them saying ' oh it's great, I'm able to have dinner on the table just on time' 😃with a brittle, tinkling laugh which I'm just not buying.

I think that's completely reasonable in fairness

Absolute nonsense.Two people have mutually agreed that knowing where each other is is useful. That’s all there is to it.

Ridiculous absolutely disgusting makes me so angry. What do you think people did 29 years ago? Either trusted their partner or not? I get the whole vaguely knowing what time someone is going to be home…send a text …leaving now?

I regularly go hiking by myself at weekends and commit the cardinal sin of doing so while being single and having no one monitoring my movements. Maybe I should stay at home just in case 🙄. Even if I was in a relationship with someone who cared to keep track - highly unlikely - I think it would spoil the whole thing for me. If one were going somewhere very remote or dangerous it might be wise to tell someone where you were going and a rough return time but I confess I've never done so. I'm probably a bit more cautious now with dependent children but once they are adults I certainly will do more of what I want and won't be telling anyone..and if the worst comes to the worst, well we all have to go and I'll have lived life on my terms and freely. That to me is everything.