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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed that according to our mortgage application I am a housewife?

53 replies

MegBusset · 14/04/2008 14:13

They have no category for SAHM (or carer or whatever) so either I am unemployed (as if!) or a housewife. FGS if I was a housewife then my house would be much tidier!

OP posts:
mummypig · 14/04/2008 14:18

The woman at the registry office said I wasn't allowed to be a housewife as I'm not married, so she put me down as a 'homemaker'. I suppose registrars are allowed to be pedantic. However, I'm not exactly sure what homemakers do .

claricebeansmum · 14/04/2008 14:20

If it is a handwritten form I always put down "mummy" as my occupation. That's what I gave up my career for.

Twiglett · 14/04/2008 14:21

it's semantics

so yes YABU

MrsTittleMouse · 14/04/2008 14:22

Drives me bonkers too. After all, if I was looking after someone else's child I would have a profession, why not my own? I always think that it makes me sound like Margo Leadbetter, rather than rushing around after a toddler!

SueBaroo · 14/04/2008 14:25

mummypig, I'd love to be called a homemaker. Marvellous phrase. I don't mind 'Housewife', but I find it quite a cold word.

'Homemaker' says 'This place is just bricks and mortar, I make it a home.' which I find quite encouraging. Of course, the problem with that is that working women also make their houses into homes.

But there we are, no term like that covers everything or every permutation (and nor could, or the 'occupation' box on forms would be gigantuous)

Iota · 14/04/2008 14:25

I quite like styling myself as unemployed - especially at the hairdressers ( sub-text - don't expect a big tip )

mawbroon · 14/04/2008 14:26

Your lender doesn't really care what you do Meg, because you don't come into their calculations if you're not earning. I would guess that's why they don't have many categories.
Trust me, they are not sitting looking at your form going, OMG she's a housewife. Really, they're not. This is because they are too busy looking through your bank statements to see what you spend your money on )

Original poster
MegBusset · 14/04/2008 14:27

But Twig a housewife and a SAHM are two different things. One looks after a house, the other looks after children. Quite an important distinction imv.

OP posts:
Blandmum · 14/04/2008 14:28

I was once asked to fill in a form for a charity.

I was a SAHM at the time, but there was no box for that and I was intructed to fill myself under 'Unemployed'. They did have room for 'Student' and 'retired'.

I was rather miffed at this, particularly since the Charity involved was Dr Barnados. I would rather have expected them to recognised the role of full time parent

Since that time I have found other charities to support

Original poster
MegBusset · 14/04/2008 14:28

It just seems such a 1950s view, that if you are at home with your children that makes you a housewife.

OP posts:
MrsMattie · 14/04/2008 14:30

I hate it, too. Housewife indeed

SueBaroo · 14/04/2008 14:30

Well it does, doesn't it? I mean that's the word for it, the same way SAHM is the accepted acronym for it online. It's inadequate, I grant you.

andiem · 14/04/2008 14:31

we have just applied to remortgage and I put housewife for the first time ever have just become sahm folloing dc2 I did feel a bit bleargh about it I must confess
dh suggested I put sahm and see if anyone knew what it meant
gwyneth paltrow called herself a domestic manager when she had time out to look after her kids

claricebeansmum · 14/04/2008 14:32

Housewife sounds like you are married to the house which I am definitely not

SueBaroo · 14/04/2008 14:34

There's that tale of someone putting 'Domestic Engineer' or something. Makes me larf, but not something I'm that fussed about.

Huzzah!

Original poster
MegBusset · 14/04/2008 14:37

I'm no more domestic than I was before having DS. I just have a mess around me at home rather than on my desk in the office

OP posts:
Twiglett · 14/04/2008 14:38

yes and chairman sounds like you make chairs .. streuth

SueBaroo · 14/04/2008 14:39

I cleaned my hob today. I am practically sweating from the effort.

Seabright · 14/04/2008 17:52

I like "Domestic Manager" personally.

Seems to sum up all the multiple jobs that go into running a home and getting stuff/people/etc sorted in the right place at the right time with the right equiptment (well, sometimes)

pointydog · 14/04/2008 17:55

yawn. yes YABU

WonkyAngel · 15/04/2008 09:16

Lol, just seen this thread and it reminded me of a bank application form we did a few weeks ago. I applied for a joint bank account over the phone.

When they sent the forms out, my dh checked it, showed me where to sign and posted it off. It's only later when I went through them, I noticed I was down as widowed!

I did chuckle and rang dh who said he remembers seeing that and vaguely thought he would let me take the first bite out of any food I might be cooking (which, granted, doesn't happen often!).

Youcannotbeserious · 15/04/2008 09:19

I'm with Mawbroon - the lenders only care what money you bring in... YOu could be MOther bl**dy Teresa and they wouldn't care if you aren't being paid for it....

At the end of the day, if you want their money, you have to fill in their forms...

YABU!!

nkf · 15/04/2008 09:27

I'd put "unemployed" if I earned no money. And if I earned some, I'd put whatever it was I earned money from. It's a question about earnings not about what you do all day.

Oliveoil · 15/04/2008 09:28

YABU

get a grip!

amidaiwish · 15/04/2008 09:30

why don't you just put self-employed then?

earnings 0
money saved per month not employing someone else £5000!