Divorce over workwear in bed

[grisen]

Lighthearted obviously but…

tonight after a short day at work my husband decided to get into bed, that I just washed yesterday, in his work clothes. To make this worse he’s a chef and we argue about this nearly everyday.

AIBU to divorce him over this?
outside of this he is usually okay, but he grew up in a very dirty home.

YABU.
Divorce costs you!
Get hints good life insurance and become the grieving widow!

This would be unacceptable for me.can u tell him that you need him to have a bath or shower, then leave clean pj's out .I get.hes tired but I just changed the bed yesterday too and would be passed off if dh did it!

That’s a fucking revolting sweaty mess. Do you have a spare room? Move him to it until he learns how to behave. Trust me it works.

WHAT!

Including the big tall / floppy hat thing?

Why is he getting in to bed wearing the clothes he ha been wearing??

Grim. I’d be pissed off!

Is he unhygienic generally, because honestly that's more concerning for the people he's cooking for than it is for your bed.

This isn't light-hearted at all. What the fuck is wrong with him? What the fuck is wrong with you that you would accept this?

Jeez calm down, she already made it clear she was being light hearted about divorcing.

@grisen YANBU to be upset with him, it doesn't take that long to change into something clean and comfy.

This is gross. Clothes from working in a kitchen stink and are covered in an oily film.

Has he always been this revolting?

YABU for saying this is jokey. Absolutely divorce him over disgusting behaviour like that. At the very least get a lock on your bedroom and don’t let him in till he’s showered after work and clothes are in the washing. That’s fucking atrocious. Throw him back in the sea. Filthy monster.

That really is grim.

If you have a spare room, make him sleep in there, and wash his own sheets.

This would be an ultimate dealbreaker for me. Dirty body in outdoor clothes in clean bed. ARGH.

Pretty sure DavidBeckhamsrightfoot was joking and being sarcastic. (unless she really is advocating the OP to do away with her husband).

Make a night of it?

an update on the chef…
he did actually change the bed and apologised.
And for the poster worried about his customers, he’s normally very clean… just has a tendency to go straight to bed when he’s tired which drives me insane.

When he gets up I’m hoping he showers and changes his clothes before heading back out 👀

Oh, bless him 😆 Some nights, when I worked in hospitality, I'd go straight to sleep on the floor inside my front door. But doesn't he know you don't sleep IN the bed in your outside clothes, you sleep ON it!

Getting back up to change the bed's very sweet, though.

These replies are a bit excessive! Yes it’s not the nicest thing but calling it vile and suggesting the OP has no standards being with someone who did this is a bit crazy. @grisen I’m glad he apologised and changed the bed, but no you weren’t BU to be cross at it.

Chef’s clothes are rank and feral after a shift in the kitchen. The smell gets into your nose and throat and it is putrid, you can almost see it hovering in the air…

Glad your DH remade the bed, OP, because his behaviour would have really upset me!

When I met my now husband about 20 years ago he worked in a very manual, sweaty job. Monday-Thursday he would come home and get straight in the bath, for some bizarre reason he skipped the bath on Friday nights to 'chill out'.
I had a relatively blunt conversation with him and told him if he expected to see me on Friday nights or get in the bed on Saturday night after he had been in it then a bath after work on Friday was mandatory! He has been squeaky clean ever since.
I know OP says this is lighthearted but for me it would be a deal breaker, no-one is getting in my bed covered in oils and food smells especially when a five minute shower and a change of clothes would solve the problem entirely.

Get him one of those sleeping bags with a hood that he can zip himself into like a greasy stinky caterpillar 😁

That is vile.
I was married to a chef. He wouldn’t even get in bed without having a shower to wash the cooking smell off at the end of the night, no matter how tired he was.

It's really weird that he travels home in his chef uniform instead of changing at the end of his shift. I worked in kitchens for years and never, ever saw a chef leave in their workwear.

…and that poster is saying, don’t divorce, murder him instead! Pretty sure it’s a joke