Is this a reasonable reaction?

[Downbadcryingatthegym]

We have a young dog who is pretty annoying at times. She just jumped up at my boyfriend and he proceeded to leave the room and slammed the door so hard that the wall shook. It made me feel very uneasy even though I know it's not about me. I know if I bring it up he will make it about the dog being badly behaved and that he is justified, it will probably start an argument.Am I being unreasonable to think this is an unacceptable response?

Did she make him jump/knock him over etc?

What are you both doing to correct this behaviour?

Take it as a sign to never have dc with him imo.. And consider how your ddog is behaving.. Is it nerves because he is aggressive around it?

No she just jumped up in front of him but didn't touch him. I either ignore or divert with a toy. He will shout at her or sometimes pin her down if she doesn't stop

I guarantee that in an argument over this, the dog's behaviour will somehow be your fault.

Pin her down? Is he thick?

I wouldn’t leave a man who got angry if the dog wasn’t being trained properly and that was my fault, and who left the room because he was angry.

Add in the door slamming though - and I’d end it. I don’t date people who don’t control their temper.

If someone pinned down my dog as it jumped up they’d be out.

He would pin the dog down? That’s not good.

He’s an arsehole who shouldn’t be around dogs.

youre also at fault. Train the dog and get bullying arsehole bf!

Wow he will pin the dog down, not good. What sort of dog do you have?

The dog behaviour isn't the issue here it's this man's theatrics and inability to communicate effectively, chosing aggression instead. It doesn't bode well for the future.

His temper makes you uneasy. That feels to me like such a huge red flag. You shouldn't have to feel like that in your own home.

If my DH wanted to get a nasty smelly dirty jumpy nippy dog, I'd say he could get it when he has moved out to the new place he must have planned to go to.

Getting physical with the dog isn't ok and if he's regularly getting frustrated that's also a red flag. I did once get annoyed with my dog and had to leave the room to take a five minutes break from her, I did yell ffs and close the door with a bit more force than necessary. It's not something I'm doing on a regular basis and I made sure to give her plenty of attention afterwards. The situation with your bf sounds different though.

It really depends. One of mine occasionally, like a few times year, get excited and jumps up. If dp reacted that way I would assume something else happened to piss him off.

if its constantly happening and can see someone getting to the end of their patience with it after while.

It also depends on how it’s being dealt with. I train out dogs, mostly, because it’s something I enjoy. If the dogs were jumping up at dp all the time, pissing him off wasn’t dealing with it (distraction rarely works in these situations and encourages it) and also told him he couldn’t work on it then I would also accept my part in it.

Whether his reaction was a red flag will depend on all sorts of nuances of the dogs, the household, the people involved and so on.

and let’s be honest, we have all been in moods where something annoying but not massively so has led to us over reacting.

Divert and ignore isn’t the way to deal with it. But Jesus, pinning her down isn’t either.

can’t believe he pins the dog down in anger but it’s the door slamming that’s worried you. Or have you been concerned about his behaviour and anger for a while and this incident has raised your concern again.

Being annoyed about a dog jumping at you isn't unreasonable in my opinion. And he didn't do anything to the dog he just left the room, albeit angrily.
However your update about him pinning the dog down is a different story altogether.
Does he usually have anger issues?

At first I voted YABU but then, I read how he pins her down...

No one likes being jumped up at by a badly trained dog.

BUT

I strongly suggest you don't spend your life with a man who behaves erratically and with physical force to minor irritations... this says a lot about him as a person, and it isn't good.

That type of reaction is violent and intent on send YOU a message as much as the dog.
It is telling you watch out.
If you don't live together, dump.
If you live together, get out.
This is not a man to EVER consider having children with.

Imagine your ddog is a pan of water. Every scenario of it acting like a ddog and getting negative /aggressive responses.... One day that bubbling pot will boil over. And someone will get hurt. That's how ddogs end up attacking people..
Imo.
No ddog from a loving family since birth /early adoption turn rouge...
Again imo.
My ddog many years ago was punched in the face. She was never the same..

He pins her down?

Your dogs behaviour will never improve around this man, never leave her alone with him. There are highly effective, non aggressive ways of teaching a dog not to jump up and a young dog will learn quickly. I found stepping forward into the dogs space and turning my back every time he tried to jump up was really effective. The moment he stopped trying and sat I rewarded with praise and attention.

That you feel unable to talk to him about this is a big red flag. I hope you don't live together.

Red flag Op, he's too rough with your dog and slams doors in anger. I'm glad he's just a BF because this doesn't say good things about his character

He pins the dog down.

Either get rid of him or rebound the dog.

WTF!!!

*rehome

This would be a serious red flag for me. Lack of control of his temper, violent reaction to an animal doing something it shouldn't.

I'd want to understand why, but I'd be very cautious about the relationship.