DH won’t stop talking

[Notpop]

We’re on holiday with a group of friends and their various DCs, some teens, some young adults. When we’re all together for example at dinner or drinks DH just dominates the conversation to the extent I can see people just glaze over. He has no idea that no one is interested in the constant stream of words he’s producing and that no one else can get a word in edgeways. My own DC get fed up with it and often won’t sit anywhere near him and he doesn’t take kindly to any form of criticism whether it be constructive or just plain telling him how it is. It’s becoming embarrassing both for him and me. AIBU or should we all just suck it up?

My DH also the same. Luckily he has got more self aware with age and years of me tactfully mentioning it. He's still chatty and spins a story out way longer than it should. There are still evenings when after a few drinks he talks over people or gets unnecessarily sweary. When I point it out in the morning he always apologises and will have realised it himself. But that's taken years! I suspect the problem here is that men in a senior position at work are only going to get worse and less willing to take on other people's views. Seen it so many times and it's very boring.

DH can also do this. I kick him u set the table or interrupt him and ask the people we are with questions. Ironically he doesn't like going to my sisters because they all talk too much as well.

If you're all sitting round then table at the end of the email I'd try and breaks that up - make more
Opportunities for side conversations. What about cards or games?

Same...

Does he do this when its just you and him?

I can't bear selfish conversation dominanators at work. They are in sufferable the sheer arrogance that what they are monologuing has more value.

If its just after ber drinks then it is more understandable.

Do you speak to him about it afterwards?

What does he say?

@Nanny0gg I'll tell him that people don't need to know the ins and outs of how they should get to where they're going. He just goes quiet. Til next time!!!

OP I feel your pain. My sister is like this and is getting worse with age. She just won’t stop talking. I find it exhausting, embarrassing and upsetting. One Christmas day she talked non stop for five hours ( you think I’m exaggerating; I wish I was), including all
through dinner. Any attempt to divert or interrupt failed, she simply talked louder. I
just wanted to cry. Everyone was glazed over. Her long monologues are boring and repetitive.
When DS y planning seating for his wedding I asked not to be near her and I no longer invite her at Christmas.

Why would you marry someone if you need to be their social monitor?

With threads like this I never understand how people get all the way to married-with-kids without noticing a fairly fundamental part of their husband's personality. Being a chatterbox isn't something people develop overnight and nor is it easily disguised. How have you only just realised?!

You don't have a friend like that because you don't seem to like her at all.

Which is fair enough because she sounds very dull but you don't have to be her friend if you can't cope with her!

A large proportion of MN doesn't seem to have realised that as adults we can choose our spouses and our friends, and ideally we can choose people we actually like being around in both cases.

One of my kids is like this unless he’s had his ADHD meds.

when he was very little and I’d wonder if my ears would fall off, he used to stand in front of me and rub his chest and shout “Mummy I’m so full of SPEEEEECH.”😂

I can laugh now but…

My ex's dad was obsessed with roads!!!

He's a boron. Why did you marry him?

I have a friend like this and it really puts me off seeing her.

Is he normally like this, and if so how do you tolerate it? All you can do is make him aware of it, his response to that is up to him. Then you need to work out how you will respond.

I would tell him what his doing and ask him to keep quiet tbh Must be very embarrassing for you. He needs to master the art of turn taking in conversation. Is he autistic ?

In my case it wasn't that DH talks too much. I would run a mile from that. It was that he is phenomenally shy. I didn't realise it as I met him through one of his very few very close friends, and he had, at the time, a very outgoing glamorous job. When that job folded, he retreated to a normal state I'd never seen and barely spoke to anyone again. I spent a few years trying to find friends for him, or feeling guilty if he was standing alone at parties while i was enjoying myself, or not going out myself very often as he never had anyone to go out with. And then I decided to stop and let him fend for himself, as a functioning adult, and the stress lifted.

But I know loads of men who hold court and dominate the room and everyone fawns all over them. So i can understand how OP may have thought he was the life and soul when she met him and then a few years later, wishes he just kept the occasional opinion to himself.

This made me laugh so hard! 🤣🤣🤣

It sounds adorable, but I can imagine it was a bit exhausting at the time.