Mums guilt ,pls no shaming

[ivise]

Hello, long story short, my little one is starting reception this year . She still doesn't recognise letters or can't spell or read ,same with numbers she can count and write by following dots but she doesn't really recognise them . I have started to teach her to recognise numbers ,but not sure if I will be able to do with letters as I don't know what is correct way to do so . Is this normal or she should know all this by now? She turned 4 in June . Pls don't shame me . We always read books and play, lots of outdoor activities. She doesn't really like sitting down and learning for long periods.I am not worried in her progression . Just thinking if I haven't neglected her learning skills :/

Same with letters she can sing alphabet but she won't recognise if I randomly pick a letter and ask her what it is ,maybe few

That's what reception is there for - to help her learn these things. Don't worry - you're doing a great job and school will do its job and get her where she needs to be

Christ, no shaming necessary at all! IME they don't expect any of that when starting school. Yes lots of kids can, but that doesn't mean it's terrible if they can't.

My just turned 4yo knows the first letter of her name (by the phonics sound, not the name) and most of the numbers to ten but that's just what she's shown an interest in.

I'd focus on recognising her name and counting - not recognising the written number, just counting up to five and then ten items.

Mostly, I'd get her excited for school, make sure she can put her jacket on etc etc etc. School will teach her the rest.

I don’t have a child of your age. However, a friend of mine is a reception teacher and we were chatting the other day. About a third of kids don’t know this when starting but by the end of the year so by the time she is 5 I’m sure she will! Please don’t stress!

4 is no age at all and certainly a time for more playing and less learning, there are many many years of that ahead.

Yes you'll be amazed how much she can do this time next year. My eldest is April born, was just about able to write her name when she started (thanks to her nursery school), by the end of the year she could write a simple sentence. Incredible.

Have a look at the Instagram toddlerscanread, I have found it extremely informative and it has taught me a much better way to teach my daughter than if I had gone into it uninformed.

Obviously many kids go into reception not able to read, but most can pick out letters and numbers. Start by things like her name written down, yours, mummy, her age, house number etc. Just start tweaking some of your chatting to maintain a lighthearted interest in learning about letters and numbers.

Each child develops at her own rate. Some of it is completely down to physical ages but some of it is what the child wants to do.

Do spend as much time as you can this summer doing number, letter and word prep. Extra practising together lets your DD know its important to you and thus makes her more keen to succeed. Maybe practise more on the 'which letter is this' questions. When my DD1 started reception she couldn't read but by the end they'd somehow taught her.

But they really come to it in their own time so just keep encouraging her.

@CelesteCunningham yes she can count very well , it's just the recognition of letters and numbers she struggle . I only thought about that as I have seen videos of younger children spelling and I was like ok did I have to teach her that before reception? Ooops but I think she will be fine .

Education is a marathon not a sprint

My son has been in a pre prep school this year and turned 4 in December and the school setting really is a game changer.

He went in not being able to read/write/count higher than 10 and now he can write his own name, knows all the letters, can count to 100 and spell and read simple words.

Your daughter only turned 4 in June so she’s bound to be a little bit behind others born earlier in the year because those few months make a huge difference at that age. But, like my son, the months after they turn 4 (especially in a school setting) they start learning so so much.

The fact you care means you’re already an awesome mum and I’m sure you’re absolutely smashing it!

oh, and be gentle; be encouraging, looking for times to say 'yes' and praise rather than correcting constantly.

@Cinocino ok thanks I will have a look

My 3 year old starts reception in September. He's 4 at the end of August. Can't read or identify written numbers yet. Can count to ten or so. I'm not worried. It's normal. He'll be reading by Y1/2

@sadabouti ok thanks

Nope, you didn't need to teach her.

A primary school teacher friend hates undoing all the teaching parents did at home!

Did your school give you a list of things to work on over the summer? Shoes, coats, listening, taking turns etc? That's the stuff you need to worry about, if she can do that then she'll be ready and able to learn. Doubtless have a tremendous time in the process!

In all honesty I wouldn't worry about that. I'd focus on the skills like going to the toilet. Getting dressed. See if you can improve these.

Don't worry at all. I would make sure she can do the other skills she'll need for school, like going to the toilet, getting dressed with coat and shoes, and asking an adult if she needs help with something. If she can manage those things school will be a lot easier!

A reception teacher will tell you that at this stage it’s far more important to focus on life skills. Putting on and off their own shoes, coats, hats and gloves, toileting and handwashing, practicing fine motor control and strengthening the hands, sitting down at a table properly etc etc. I’d say the only thing to worry about is to make sure he can hold a pencil correctly. Everything else will come at school.

We use reading eggs and maths seed. It's an app. They are doing a free trial at the moment. They also have worksheets and a summer catch up plan. My DC is 5 and has a reading age of 7 and 3 months. DC 4 recognises her letters, phonics sounds and numbers but can't read yet. There is also teach your monster to read which is free on a laptop. It's worth a little bit of screen time but do get her to do the worksheets as well. Honestly, you won't believe the progress just with 10 minutes of maths and phonics a day over summer break

@CelesteCunningham this is why I haven't started with letter because I have no clue on how to teach them that 😄 numbers will do but she doesn't really show so much interest in that too .
Yes they did give me that as well

@peachgreen ok this is really good to know , thank you. She knows most of those things already , makes me feel better 😄

@2sisters thank you so much and well done on your little one

Alphablocks on cbeebies

My kids were all high flyers. They knew jack shit when they started school - no numbers or letters. They basically played in the sand pit at nursery and that how I wanted it. They soon caught up.

It’s best to let her play rather than push it and turn her off learning. Reading together and getting her to love stories and reading is the best thing you can do for her at this stage. She’s still very young. Let the qualified teachers do the rest.