To feel like this about home interiors...

[ComfyOldRockingChair]

This is a funny one to try and explain but I'll give it a go, hopefully this makes sense.
I have a friend who had the loveliest little house, it was a standard 3 bed semi but she had filled it with little crafts that her and her daughter made together (nice things that looked good on display, not just mouldy pasta necklaces!) it was clean but never 'spotless' and always felt welcoming, I loved going to see her and relaxed almost immediately when we got chatting.
On paper I have a 'better' house, bigger rooms, the kitchen is about 3x bigger than my friends but in the decades we have lived here, through multiple redecorations I have never managed to make it feel so homely and welcoming.
We have now decided to move, the house we are moving to is similar to my current house but smaller and I desperately want it to feel like 'home'.
Will it feel cosier just by being smaller? Style wise it is pretty much my exact taste decoratively speaking, so if I have done something wrong with my current house the new one will have the same issue!
There is nothing I can put my finger on in my current house as to why I don't get the 'feeling' here, I have tried everything ....we must have a hundred blankets dotted around the place, no stark colours on the walls etc.
I am trying to work out if this is a me problem (that will follow us when we move) or a current house problem (dodgy lay lines or something 😆) that I can leave behind.
Aibu to think my new house will solve the problem?

Chalky, dusty paints in warm blues, greens and greys sound fine but gloss white against them on the woodwork sounds very jarring. I would suggest never having gloss or white on the woodwork but use either the same colour as the walls or a pale version of your wall colour ie get you woodwork paint mixed area quarter strength of your wall paint.

I don't think having different tastes from others, or changing what is good for you, is a problem at all.

That's good that you've got a colour you love, maybe the feel of the room needs to head to a more cool, calm and fresh feel rather than cosy. Maybe you don't want to live with your friends style. If you chose your modern light fitting because you like it and it's a contrast that's fine. I think you need to lean into what you like , not try to re create your friends style. Just be welcoming and warm to people when they visit.

I think wall paper really helps a room feel alive and like it has a 'mood' if that makes sense. I often just do one wall then paint the rest. People say my house feels very homely. I like colour tho nothing garish, also wood really warms a room as does beautiful fabrics. I then to find something I love, material, a cushion etc then build my room around it if that makes sense.

If you look at a colour wheel the warm range from purple through to yellow.

So you mentioned green, so a muted green, or moss green, maybe a warm dusky pink pop with matt finish trim. Look at textiles and textures also. A flat blue blanket won't necessarily give the homeliness but a deep purple textured similar to velvet would.

I think that sounds rather cold (in terms of bring, blue, grey and white) and bland, but if you like it, where’s the issue? Where does it differ most strongly from your friend’s more ‘welcoming’ living room? Is yours too ‘matchy’ in comparison?

Could you take up the carpet and sand and stain the floorboards with rugs? Paint n the walls terracotta?

What about furniture placement? In a larger room you can create a cosier feel by bringing the sofas in off the walls for example, or creating different zones.

When we renovated and extended our current house we looked at dozens if interiors type magazines. I particularly like 25 Beautiful Homes. When we found a ‘look’ we liked we examined colours, textures , lighting… Magazines often give stockists of similar items. Oh, and I visit Home Sense regularly ! 😀

Fairy lights! Always make a room feel cosy. Could you buy a copy of Ideal Home magazine for a few months and the see if any of the pictures ‘sing’ to you and work around that.

This kind of thing is what I would be most attracted to in a magazine!
Perhaps I can't have both, I need to decide whether I want homely or whatever my style is?

Bookshelves!! Homes need books! Mix in some vintage, antique or otherwise interesting bric a brac. Avoid going full-on John Lewis for the soft furnishings. Lots of squishy but not too matchy-matchy cushions for colour and comfort, interesting mirrors for light reflection, original (doesn’t need to be expensive) art on the walls.

This is beautiful, classy and elegant but it’s not warm, homely or welcoming. I wouldn’t feel comfortable and cosy in a space like this although obviously it would make a lovely backdrop for photos. I agree you need to decide what you want as you can’t really have elegant/ sophisticated and homely/ comfy.

I don’t mean this to sound rude but you probably don’t have much of a style.

if you can move into someone else’s house (the new house you are buying) and it be pretty much decorated already to suit your taste, your taste is probably fairly uninspiring. I can honestly say even beautifully well done places would never feel like ‘me’, I’d always have to change loads.

See I think that absolutely looks welcoming and comfortable. Which just goes to show how subjective it is.

OP I do think this is your perception rather than actual decor. Your room you described sounds nice.

I wonder if this is more of a ‘you’ problem than an interiors problem.

just stick to what you’ve got and add things that make you feel good. Who are your favourite artists? Get some framed posters of their work. Where in the world have you travelled? Put up some things that remind you of that. Then just spend time in your space enjoying it.

i use specific colours for specific reasons on the walls and woodwork, that are personal to me.

also do add different textures through rugs, cushions, plants etc.

To me that looks grand rather than cosy, and a bit bare.

I'll try and post a pic of a blue and white room that I think is cosy - from the house in netflix show 'Bonus Family'.

It's a warmer shade of blue, and they have lots of pics/cushions/fabrics and wooden floors. Other pops of colour to contrast with the blue too.

You could cosy up the room in that picture you posted (I'm no expert but some curtains and a more colourful rug would make an instant difference), but it's not what you're drawn to?

I felt like this with our old house (FTBs, new build) no matter what I tried it never felt finished or homely. I wasn't sure if that's because we bought stuff cheap/second hand/family gave us bits to start us off a lot of the time so stuff just didn't feel like it matched or felt like 'us'. We were there for 6 years and have moved into a bigger renovation project house but weirdly it already feels cosier and more like home. That could be down to the fact that it's not been decorated since the 70s and smells like my Grans house 🤣

I probably don't to be honest, I moved out of my parents relatively young, we did one house up with a view to selling (beige and magnolia everywhere!) and then bought this house. When we started decorating here for the first time we had a 4 year old and a baby so I just wanted everything clean, fresh and done so we could start living.
I have a lot to think about before I move otherwise I am just going to repeat the same patterns.

Some people create stylish homes and some people don't. I'm really good at making our home stylish and cosy but my personal style is pretty lame and no matter how hard I try I just don't have it.

It strikes me that you admire your friend's home and appreciate it, but that's not actually what you want for yourself. If you gravitate towards cool colours then you need pops and accents of warm otherwise it's all too flat and cold. Pictures on walls and big plants. Rugs.

Agree with this, some people have the ability to make clutter look bohemian and stylish whereas in my home it just looks like clutter.

I like your colours, OP. I think they can look cozy and inviting. There is no need not why they shouldn't be.

Without photos of your room and your friend's room it is impossible to know what is about her house you like so much.

But, for me, cozy means clean, not cluttered, but also no minimalist. Lot of books, pillows, blankets, furniture that complement each other but they do not match, it is a tricky balance and not everbody can do it.

Mabye you can ask your friend for an advice?

Have always thought traditional Welsh blankets give a lovely cosy feel.

https://www.felinfach.com/collections/welsh-blankets

This is the answer

I would go with either deep red or ochre tone accessories to warm up the shade of blue in that photo. Cushion covers or a rug in a persian rug style pattern. Add lots of plants and that would feel cosy and calming to me.

Agree on the cold colours. I love a blue but it needs something warm to contrast. How about an orange rug/sofa/cushions to complement the blue? Wood? Pictures on the walls?

Your sample photo is nice for a grand National Trust hall, but perhaps not for a homely relaxed feel...