Insomniacs and ex-insomniacs - where are you?!

[GoldfishSoup]

I can’t take any more!!!

Im late 30s. My insomnia started as a young teen and has never gone away. I’ve done it all; no caffeine, exercise, calming things, no phones/tv, music, no music, hypnosis, eating banana or kiwis before bed, taking all the different types of magnesium, counselling - nothing works!!!
I even wake up when I take Nytol. The only thing that made me feel better was amitriptyline but I stopped that when I got pregnant and didn’t go back on it because I don’t want to be rely on pills, but what else can you do? I’m exhausted. I’m beyond exhausted. I read that suicide rates of insomniacs are hugely increased and I am reaching the point where I understand why. I don’t want to live like this, it affects my entire life in a negative manner. I get around 3-4 hours of sleep a night.

I’m trying to make sure my gut flora is healthy currently to see if that works; I have a good diet already but am trying to have probiotics where I can and read that prebiotics may help too.

But PLEASE if you have found something that helps, something that helps you sleep. I’m not awake stressing about things, my brain is just up there like ‘Hey, what are all the words to that 80s song that you heard once about ten years ago? I know, let’s figure them out’ or ‘why don’t humans have retractable anuses?!’

Im so miserable. I imagine my life with energy, not dreading every night and it would be a dream. Instead it’s a living nightmare.

My insomnia is still quite bad (I mean, when I'm not being woken up by a baby and child)... but the one thing that has made the biggest difference is moving to a quiet house. It turns out I need proper quiet to sleep. Also pitch darkness. (but unfortunately we have to use nightlights atm because my kids are still young and dd wanders.)

I hope you find something straightforward like that, that helps.

I personally can't use nytol or kalms as they give me sleep paralysis

Insomnia is fucking awful. The only thing that works for me is phenergen. However, only take it if you are able to sleep for at least 8 hours,otherwise you'll feel groggy the next day.

My fear is that long term usage of some sleeping pills can apparently cause Alzheimer’s or dementia. I mean, lack of sleep can also cause those things so I guess we’re fucked either way…?!

I have had terrible maintenance insomnia so I still wake multiple times in the night. What I've found helpful is understanding, really understanding, why. Basically, because of my childhood and other things I don't feel safe enough to sleep. I've never learned it as a skill as since babyhood I didn't feel safe. So the things that help the most are things that make me feel safe - a secure home, financial security, emotional security, being healthy, deep somatic work, grounding, meditation etc. That alongside the usual sleep hygiene.

I totally sympathise. I've had insomnia for about 35 years on & off! At the moment I'm on anti depressants prescribed by the GP even though I'm not depressed & I use a sleep patch with melatonin. Works most nights. If I wake up & can't get back to sleep I take an anti histamine & a Rescue Remedy Night capsule. I also tense & relax parts of the body whilst deep breathing. Fresh air & exercise every day also helps

Oh and never ever look at the clock!

i haven’t tried melatonin, does it work?

Im so frightened of keeping taking things that can do long term damage, but also the insomnia is doing its own damage. I am so jealous of people who can sleep, they have no idea how truly lucky they are!!!

I had insomnia after having my daughter. It's better now because I'm on amitriptyline for migraine management. I suspect my sleep would be bad without it

I've had 4 and half hours of sleep or less every night for years.

I'm currently working through Michael Mosley's '4 Weeks to Better Sleep' book and after 4 weeks I'm mostly sleeping 6 hours per night and believe I can improve on that.

I feel it's important to adhere to all the stages and not be in a rush to skip through the bits that don't seem relevant. For the price of a paperback it has to be worth a try.

Kirkland sleep aid works brilliantly for me, the active ingredient is an antihistamine. I take half a tablet, one is too much.

I don't think you mentioned sports or running or long daily walks? What about changing jobs and doing some kind of physical work or hobby? I'm sure if your body were really worn out you would sleep like a baby.

Oh it was my saviour, I loved it. But I haven’t gone back on it due to fear. My mania has increased since my last DC 4 years ago? It’s been raging since then. I wonder if your brain becomes hardwired to be alert.

It’s like I don’t go into deep sleep? I can snap out of sleep immediately.

Another insomniac - though more recent as a result of perimenopause. I take an antihistamine, magnesium, and a melatonin patch at night. Plus no caffeine or sugar help too.

I used to really struggle with my sleep, but in the last few years it seems to have turned itself around.

For me, the main changes are - no alcohol, no caffeine after 6pm, daily exercise and having a bedtime routine. So, roughly the same time every night I do the same things - a quick tidy round (I can't switch off if I know there's a mess waiting for me), feed the animals, wash face/brush teeth, toilet, up to bed where I read/watch TV/play on my phone for a while, then another toilet trip, then fan on, earplugs in, phone off and bed.

Yes, it's "boring" but it works! I'm asleep within minutes 99% of the time, and sleep through until morning.

Yes I did mention exercise! I walk, swim either in the sea or a pool and have an exercise bike - all used regularly. I’ve also done yoga and Pilates and am going back to Pilates soon. None of it makes a difference.

I used to work in an outdoors jobs too. In fact, one with with a lot of cleaning/heavy lifting (thinks looking after animals, so serious physical work). It never made a difference. Believe me, my body has been utterly broken and I’ve still been wide awake. It doesn’t work like that unfortunately, I wish it did as it would make it easier to deal with!

I do all this - don’t drink ever, don’t smoke, don’t drink coffee etc, just herbal tea and none with caffeine. I have a routine, in the winter I’m doing things by candle light to wind my body down. I very rarely watch TV, I’m a big book and audiobook person. I make sure I get daylight the second I wake up. I am outside daily and I exercise. None of it works.

So I have tried magnesium, specifically glycine or whichever one it is, I might get back in that and I’m very curious about melatonin. Don’t get those from the dr?

I bought the melatonin patches in the US as they're available without prescription. You could probably buy online here. The GP has prescribed melatonin tablets for my DS before now though.

Okay, I may go back to them and ask for something and see.

It sounds weird, but have you tried not having a routine and just doing whatever feels natural? Even if that means reading or doing something "anti sleep"?

Routines can be really beneficial but I think they can go the other way for some people - as in, if you do XYZ and it always leads to no sleep, it becomes a bit of self-fulfilling prophecy in some ways.

Another thing that works for me, if I have racing thoughts, is writing them down before I hit the pillow. Then I don't feel like I need to remember them.

Also I lean on dh loads and thought-dump at him before going to sleep, which helps prevent the thoughts racing. (Poor guy. He knew what he was marrying though)

That’s interesting.. it goes against the grain. It maybe you’re right, maybe th pressure is too much? Worth a try!

I also tell myself a story in my head before going to sleep. Like, I'm a premier league footballer, or a slayer of dragons, or something. It shuts of the racing thoughts and then I eventually fall asleep.

I thought I was weird for doing this but then I read that quite a lot of people do

Are you on your natural sleep pattern? Would you be someone who would naturally go to bed in the early hours and wake up late morning, if you entirely made your own schedule?

I wonder if a lot of us insomniacs are night owls who are overstimulating ourselves with exhaustion from trying to keep to the wrong circadian rhythm.