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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To order from Tesco when she lives really close by?

96 replies

pontipinemum · 17/07/2024 09:26

Do you think the delivery driver would judge you for getting your shopping delivered if you live really close - 300 meters - from the shop?

My mother is really unwell right now, using a frame to walk and adjusting to being told she has a life long illness which will have huge implications along with all the medication that comes with it. She also can't currently drive.

I've told her to get the shopping delivered but she is so concerned about what the driver will think. So she is just waiting until one of her sister offers. I can't do it, I live 3 hours away, she's just spent the last two weeks with me. But she wanted to go home to sort out a few bits.

TBH if I didn't have a car I'd probably pay for a weekly shop to be delivered anyway instead of trying to carry it home or do two shops

YABU - that is too close to get delivery
YANBU - get the delivery

OP posts:
Needmorelego · 17/07/2024 09:29

The driver won't care or even give it a second thought.

Andwegoroundagain · 17/07/2024 09:29

Get Sainsbury's or Ocado instead if she's that worried !

Shielehdie · 17/07/2024 09:30

The driver will absolutely not judge her. An enormous part of the work delivery drivers do relates to people who can’t get their shopping themselves due to disability or infirmity. Absolutely go for it.

AmiShitsaline · 17/07/2024 09:30

Driver is being paid to do a job, they won’t give a toss. Even if they do judge, so what?! I honestly wouldn’t give a second thought or care and get the delivery.

Countless people get deliveries because they simply can’t be bothered, nobody bats an eyelid.

GigiAnnna · 17/07/2024 09:31

It wouldn't matter if they did judge, but she is clearly unable to do the shopping herself so this is the best solution. I used to live next door to a Chinese takeaway and I used to phone them and ask them to bring my order round because I was single with young kids in bed.

EatTheGnome · 17/07/2024 09:32

No they won't. Not least because they have loads of better things to worry about.

Even if they dud, who csres as long as your mum gets the help she needs.

Sorry to hear she is unwell.

Original poster
pontipinemum · 17/07/2024 09:33

Thanks, everyone is saying pretty much what I've said to her. The driver won't care and if they do so what! But I really don't think they will.

Tesco is the only one that deliver in her town.

OP posts:
marshmallowfinder · 17/07/2024 09:34

This is utterly daft to worry about. The driver will not care in the slightest, Tesco offer a delivery service without restriction on where you live, and she's the customer. She's paid for the delivery service. Why on earth would it be a problem?

PuttingDownRoots · 17/07/2024 09:34

Even if the driver judges the address initially... do you think they will really find it surprising when its an elderly lady that opens the door?

Honestly... People get coffees delivered these days.

NoMoreLifts · 17/07/2024 09:34

Get the delivery.
There will be loads of other things to do too, to support her.
Why would the delivery driver judge? If she has frame it will be obvious she's incapacitated. And lots of things that affect peoples ability and desire to go to supermarket are invisible. e.g. recieving chemo
It's one of the few areas that has got better in personal care (not by design!) in the last few years. You used to have to pay someone to do your shopping and often they could only go to the most local shop, which is limiting.

longdistanceclaraclara · 17/07/2024 09:34

When Dts were babies and h was away with work I used to do this if I realised last minute we had run out of something. I can see the shop from my bedroom window. They get paid to deliver!

MogTheMoogle · 17/07/2024 09:35

There is any number of reasons to get a delivery. I get a weekly delivery and I'm perfectly capable of taking myself round a store.

It ensures I get everything I need, without any extras and can see how much I'm spending and takes less time (or at least can be done in small moments).

The driver probably doesn't care, or in fact prefers deliveries closer to home to get off quicker, or refill. I imagine a route benefits from a balance of super close deliveries as well as far away ones.

...is the asda store further, if the proximity to tesco is really a mental hurdle?

Glittertwins · 17/07/2024 09:37

I've had deliveries since I was pregnant with DTs a while ago now. We don't live far from the shop but it's a massive convenience for us to have the delivery and that's why we will keep using it.

SootspriteSearcher · 17/07/2024 09:37

The driver won't care or judge! I used to get deliveries as I just couldn't find the time to go between work and young kids. I lived very close too.

And there's no guarantee the order will come from that store anyway.

SonicTheHodgeheg · 17/07/2024 09:38

The driver won’t care.
The supermarkets will treat her just like the customer who lives 3000m away and be delighted with the custom.
I worked in a supermarket and people in the offices next to the supermarket used to order groceries via Deliveroo.

Eadfrith · 17/07/2024 09:38

No. People order shopping online for loads of different reasons, none of which are the delivery drivers business.

DangerousMouse · 17/07/2024 09:38

My DD delivers for Tesco and I can promise you they won't judge, the shopping doesn't usually come from the store, they tend to have a different facility where they pick from and the vans work out of if that makes it seem any better for her. My DD loves delivering to elderly who need a little bit more help as it changes up the shift a bit

malmi · 17/07/2024 09:39

I get where she's coming from as I sometimes think the delivery driver is judging me when he sees the car in the garage. I have to remind myself that anyone can order delivery for whatever reason they want. It's a service you pay for and the drivers care more about getting their deliveries done and going home.

cloudy477654 · 17/07/2024 09:40

They won't care and they'll bring the boxes in to the kitchen for her too.
Easier job for them anyway than a long drive down a bumpy track or similar!

LoveSandbanks · 17/07/2024 09:41

Our house is closer to the door of Sainsbury’s than the end of their car park. I’ve absolutely no issue with getting shopping delivered.

InvestinITMN · 17/07/2024 09:42

oh OP

LlamaNoDrama · 17/07/2024 09:43

I doubt it. It keeps them in a job! Plus that's exactly what it's there for. To help those who can't or don't want to go out to shop

nosyupnorth · 17/07/2024 09:43

I've done that! I wasn't ill or anything I just wanted to stock the cupboards with a lot of tinned/heavy stuff and it was more practical to pay the delivery fee than go to the shop half a dozen times to get it in batches that I could carry (and for things like the big sacks of rice because I wouldn't have been able to get it off the ground for any useful length of time).
I had a bit of joke with the driver about the fact we could still see the shop from my front door, but they weren't judgemental about it in the slightest.

Sunnydiary · 17/07/2024 09:43

I live ten minutes walk from a GIGANTIC Tesco but always get delivery as I hate being in the supermarket and it helps with budgeting.

I never even considered what the drivers think. They are universally chatty and pleasant.

Also, my shopping doesn’t actually come from the store at the top of my road. It comes from one that’s about ten miles away…

InvestinITMN · 17/07/2024 09:43

pontipinemum · 17/07/2024 09:33

Thanks, everyone is saying pretty much what I've said to her. The driver won't care and if they do so what! But I really don't think they will.

Tesco is the only one that deliver in her town.

Edited

what town is she in that ocado, sainsbury’s, asda, iceland, waitrose etc won’t deliver there??!