If your kids use screens in a restaurant

[bravefox]

... at least have the decency to bring headphones or put them on silent.

Took my two out for a bite to eat after clubs this morning, would have been quieter to sit in an arcade. If you must let your kids use a tablet etc while they're waiting fine, but please don't make the rest of us listen to it.

YABU: deal with it
YANBU: turn the sound off!!

Yes and no. I'd be amazed if the couple on the flight behind us who saw nothing wrong with their 4 year old kid watching tablet before the fight had even taken off while they got drunk were very different day to day. Perhaps they are, who knows. And if you're so prepared you have a tablet with the right videos ready I doubt it's a one off.

But also so what if it is a rare occurrence? I don't look at these parents and think "those people are terrible parents". If the iPad is on silent I don't even look at them or form an opinion at all. But if my attention goes that way because of their loud device I think something like "that's annoying me and also it's bad for their kids". This is true. It's even more true if they do it all the time.

Edit to add: I don't think this makes people bad parents, obviously. I'm sure everyone does things that aren't great. My kid doesn't eat and vegetables and I don't try that hard to cook things with hidden veg. But I really don't see why people are acting like it's massively bad to judge parents who have their NT kids on tablets. We all have opinions on what's good and bad, surely few people think that it's actually better to be on a tablet.

All the judgey pants parents could remember that, given that nobody is perfect, there’s probably aspects of their parenting that others would think was wrong.

I’d like to know, what is wrong with occasional ‘lazy parenting’?

Must patenting be constantly working to prove what an amazing mum or dad you are? What’s wrong with the occasional meal out because you’re knackered and just want to eat something without having to help a 3 year old stick their stickers in the right place.

Assuming a parent who gives their child a screen at a restaurant in order to eat something while it’s still hot, is a bad parent is utterly bizarre. It might have followed a day spent interacting with them and doing wonderfully educational and worthy activities, for all you know.

Ive got 4 children, from teenage down to aged 8. All can sit beautifully and are complimented on their behaviour in restaurants. None require a screen, nor do we use them now. But did I sometimes give them a screen so I could have a conversation with my husband after spending all day at home with them? Fucking right I did. Because I’m not a mummy martyr. Headphones or sound off though, obviously.

What baloney, I'm not sure my parenting good or bad, has that kind of impact on strangers

I’d like to know, what is wrong with occasional ‘lazy parenting’?

Absolutely nothing. But when that 'lazy parenting' affects someone else, whether it's a one off or a lot, it becomes a problem.

How did families manage in restaurants years ago before the arrival of these bloody screens? Oh kids were taught how to behave!

This

It’s good to see MN deleting some of the ableist comments on this thread. Shame those people won’t learn from their own behaviour though!

i clearly said in a pp that screens should be on silent or headphones. I’m definitely not advocating disturbing other people.

@ColinMyWifeBridgerton in my book it’s far worse to not ensure your child has a varied diet than allow them to watch peppa pig in a cafe (on silent).

Do better at hiding veg!

if you have kids, hopefully you haven’t passed on your judgyness onto them.

im sure you are the perfect parent though and never got judged for any of your choices in life 🙄

I can't imagine why anybody would have an opinion on your situation. They don't hear your child's programme, he has headphones on. Nothing to say about it.

I don't think people really care how others parent - only when it impacts on them and that's fair enough. If your child needs tablet/phone, headphones on - or on silent. That's it.

If you can't beat them, join them. I tend to go and stand beside them and play Rule Britannia at full volume.

Reading through this thread they sadly do

This has been addressed multiple times on the thread :)

As this thread shows people will judge anything sadly. Some people just like to share their “expertise”.

I have even been judged for doing DS tube feed in a cafe as apparently it’s disgusting and should be done in the toilets so nobody could see. Strangely she didn’t like the invite to go and have her dinner in the toilets!

I would actually like to say that I think the airplane IS somewhere public where screens are extremely helpful and I don’t see why someone wouldn’t use them. I’m very anti screens out and about but 1) screens for a 2 hour flight makes life 1000 x easier and 2) it’s a lot less annoying for everyone than listening to the hard mode parenting you need to do to entertain little children for that length of time (eg singing songs, reading books etc).

I have had a flight before with an 18 month old who just wouldn’t wear earphones. We had the volume low and maybe it was antisocial but it was that or listen to me sing/my music toddler kick off. A bit of pingu was a lot less irritating than whatever Sandra in 13A was telling Susan in 13B about her home renovation too 🤣

That is a disgrace. I think some people have become so insulated from what goes on as daily life for other people that they feel they must like or not like whatever it is. The fact that it is none of their business escapes them. I blame X-factor and the like.

When I was a kid, we were told very firmly indeed, NOT to stare and not to make comments about other people. Education would be in the car afterwards about why and what, if needed.

I'm sad that you've had to put up with this idiocy from some really thick-witted people who should know better than to comment.

"Has your child tried not being autistic?"

I have had a flight before with an 18 month old who just wouldn’t wear earphones. We had the volume low and maybe it was antisocial but it was that or listen to me sing/my music toddler kick off. A bit of pingu was a lot less irritating than whatever Sandra in 13A was telling Susan in 13B about her home renovation too

That is what any parent who doesn't care says. There are so many of them that all of this 'low volume' stuff really isn't. If your child won't wear headphones then it goes on silent. Choose.