To say thank you to Mumsnet?

[Mamtorr]

I wasn't going to join a union for my job but I saw an ama about a union rep and I happened to read 3 threads where the OP was told to contact their rep.

16 months of membership later and I find myself in an untenable position in my job. I contacted my local unison rep and she has been incredible. My manager is trying to get rid of me for whistleblowing in the nhs and now I'm 'medically suspended' so I'm not using sick pay, I'm just off work on full pay until they find me somewhere else to go.

My union rep is so good and shutting down my horrendous manager, she's also gone above the hr person who is copied into my managers emails to me.

If you're not in a union and you work in the NHS.. JOIN ONE!!!

I've been a nurse for 14 years and lve never felt more supported than now. My union rep asked if I wanted her to come and join me at my house to be with me during the zoom meeting.

I will probably have to be redeployed because of my disclosures but I know my rep will force my trust to find a suitable position.

I was given a formal written warning for ordering 2 x meals a day for the family parents of a child who was on end of life care because 'they're not the patients' we're talking would probably pass that day and the parents hadn't eaten in 3 days. I then got another warning for making the parents of a child just diagnosed with cancer (like literally that day) a cup of tea because I should have told them that there was a parents kitchen and had them make their own tea..

I stood up to my managers and now I'm facing disciplinary action for 'wasting ward resources'

So thank you Mumsnet for giving me the kick up the arse to join a union because if I hadn't and I'd disclosed to hr my concerns alone I wouldn't be in a job right now.

@BarryCantSwim the ward housekeeper reported me to management as she asked me why I was making a cup of tea for myself on shift and I said I wasn't I was making it for room x because they had just had hideous news.

She told me I should have told them to make themselves a brew in the parents kitchen and I told her to stop being stupid they weren't in a position to make themselves a cup of tea. So she reported me

Can I just say the thank you. A nurse made me a cup of tea and told me drink it at my son’s bedside which wasn’t allowed. It was the middle of the night and I’ve never been so scared in my life. It might not sound like much but it was what I needed physically because I was freezing and in shock, it was what I needed emotionally because it broke the state i was in staring at his tiny body and it told me that everything was taken care off. I really would follow that woman through the gates of hell if she asked. If she’d got into trouble for that it would be outrageous and I would defend her to my last breath.

so glad your union rep is doing what they should and sorting it out. I really hope you end up in a better position in your next role.

The ward housekeeper reported you for that?

Dear god, what have we become?????

That is hideous OP. I’m a consultant and have made a cup of tea for a relative many times after giving them hideous news. It’s human kindness.
Holy Moly - what is the NHS coming too??
I also asked if we could pay for a taxi for a very anxious 88 year old who had left her demented husband at home. She was sobbing that she would miss her bus.

Well done OP for sticking your neck out. You manager needs to take a long hard look at themself and ask why they are in HealthCARE.

I hope this thread is picked up by the press.
What a horrible ward housekeeper.
And your manager words fail me.
Good luck for Friday

Stumbled upon this yesterday, channel 4 on the failings of the nursing and midwifery council.

https://www.channel4.com/news/damning-report-on-nursing-and-midwifery-council-will-be-turning-point-says-chair

Thank you for adding your voice, OP. I've needed multiple admissions and surgeries for repeat ectopic pregnancies and had phenomenal care from nurses. I wish you all the best. And I love your union rep, too. All power to you.

You’re the type of nurse I would want looking after my family or friends. You are a caring and compassionate human being who is doing what’s expected of a professional care giver. Thank you for being you and going up against this injustice. Good luck Friday. Be thinking of you .

This. Back in the day, as ward sister, I would arrive on shift about 15 minutes early and the lovely ward maids (as they were known then) used to bring me a cup of tea! They were always kind and helpful to patients too.

I’ve been so grateful to nursing staff organising meals and bringing tea when my DD has been admitted - that small kindness makes it easier to cope with the uncertainty and we weren’t dealing with anything life threatening. I’m glad you have good representation - I always support union membership, they do an amazing job of fighting for workers.

Best of luck tomorrow.

Agree that everyone should be in a trade union. My life would be so completely different if I hadn’t joined many years ago.

Good luck OP

She didn't report you for making tea, she reported you if you did call her stupid, if you did just apologise as its not professional, the whole situation is ridiculous though and could have been sorted at ward level. A friend of mine was suspended for ordering a taxi after working unpaid overtime to visit her sick partner in hospital, its not what you do, its the way that you do it, as the song goes. Enjoy being paid full pay for having a rest. Ordering for a distressed parent is not the same as ordering extra for the staff which is a hanging offense these days, red tape at its finest.

I then got another warning for making the parents of a child just diagnosed with cancer (like literally that day) a cup of tea because I should have told them that there was a parents kitchen and had them make their own tea..

That is shocking, my niece is regularly in hospital and I visit her often, if it is just one person and you are not getting in the way, they are happy if you hang about after visiting until later in the evening as they know it is good for the patients to have support. Every time I am there and they are doing a tea round they offer me a cup (I always decline as I don't drink tea/coffee).

She has also had problems with her work (retail) due to her regular hospital admissions/poor attendance and tried to use her union (can't remember the name it was one of the smaller ones) and they were useless, told her they were to busy to help her! She switched to Unite and they have been very supportive and helpful, they could only advise her over the phone for the first time they disciplined her as she had just joined, but the next hospital admission they were fully on board.

We always make a drink and biscuits for relatives with very sick patients or follow, it takes nothing to be kind. Our lovely ward hostess offers to do this if we're busy, on the tearoubds what's an extra few teabags to anyone really. If I were the unit manager this is something I'd bring up in the managers meeting, let the meanies give their reasons and costings to the Trust. Ask them how they would handle the situation in your meeting, ask how you can all improve the care for parents, acknowledge the ward hostess may have felt undermined but that you stick by what you did . Offer to pay for the meals which of course they will say no to. If they decide, or you decide, to move then it's for the best reasons as you cannot work in an uncaring environment that leads to a disciplinary, it will be their loss.

Op says the investigation is for "inappropriately using ward resources" rather than rudeness or unprofessional behaviour. Not that anything she's done should warrant this.

I'd have been tempted to chuck 5p at the manager to cover the tea bag and 1/20th of a pint of milk and tell her to stick that in the budget.

How can they seriously justify the cost of a cup of tea and 2 patient meals versus the cost of having you suspended on full pay, therefore needing agency to cover your shifts, the time taken for everyone in the investigation etc - would come to 30x more the alleged resources you "wasted", its completely disproportionate.

Because they are petty penny pinchers and the hostess might be embarrassed to say she was rude to me so they've turned it into a mountain not the teeny weeny Mousehole it could have been.

What's the meeting tomorrow about, are you appealing the warning or is it for them to decide what they are going to do. Have you already had a investigative meeting followed by the discipljbaru where they issued a formal warning, it all sounds really
Petty and I'm surprised hr and the investigating officer has let it lead to this instead of just a ward and matron meeting.

No I didn't call her stupid. I said 'don't be ridiculous they have just had their lives turned upside down, it's just a cup of tea'

I paraphrased earlier. I stand by what I said though

I'm appealing the warning.

Budgets are squeezed tight. So what a waste of resources to get into a legal challenge with staff for making a fucking cup of tea or giving a couple of sandwiches to the family of a dying child.

For goodness sake. If money needs to be saved it could start with the (often) overpaid, useless management in most NHS trusts.

Good for you, ,let your rep speak for you, its impossible to argue with idiots who won't back down. id be requesting an immediate move to a different ward and the warning to be dismissed, removed from your employment file or, if they continue with this nonsense at best, downgraded to a verbal. What level of warning did they give you. Hopefulky your manager will also be spoken to about wasting resources,

Yes, where’s the Daily Fail when you need it ?
And I’m afraid I can think of several words for the housekeeper and the manager ……🤬🤬🤬

Just to be clear, when I said It's good that it's being addressed, I meant the fact that parents don't get fed when their children are in hospital. Not that I'm glad that the OP is getting a disciplinary.

imho Sophie's legacy can't come in soon enough and should be expanded to include siblings as well.

This is really shocking but I am not surprised. I absolutely agree if you work in the NHS impaericular you must join a union today.

What does your site Matron think of this? It's absolutely ridiculous! That this has even become a thing now how many resources are being used for a full investigation?.

I remember hearing someone say once HR are for the benefit of management so I wouldn't trust them. Confidentiality in NHS is pretty slack for staff members.

Of course in some instances its for management to be seen to be doing something but there will also be serious misconduct that needs urgent investigation and suspension, like Lucy Letby ( joke it looks months to do anything ). I'd ask the panel to add up the costs involved in this case vs the cost of a hot drink and 2 meals.,its all about do as we say, policies, once you do it everyone else will blah blah. The kindness and empathy gets lost in the pig headedness