To say thank you to Mumsnet?

[Mamtorr]

I wasn't going to join a union for my job but I saw an ama about a union rep and I happened to read 3 threads where the OP was told to contact their rep.

16 months of membership later and I find myself in an untenable position in my job. I contacted my local unison rep and she has been incredible. My manager is trying to get rid of me for whistleblowing in the nhs and now I'm 'medically suspended' so I'm not using sick pay, I'm just off work on full pay until they find me somewhere else to go.

My union rep is so good and shutting down my horrendous manager, she's also gone above the hr person who is copied into my managers emails to me.

If you're not in a union and you work in the NHS.. JOIN ONE!!!

I've been a nurse for 14 years and lve never felt more supported than now. My union rep asked if I wanted her to come and join me at my house to be with me during the zoom meeting.

I will probably have to be redeployed because of my disclosures but I know my rep will force my trust to find a suitable position.

I was given a formal written warning for ordering 2 x meals a day for the family parents of a child who was on end of life care because 'they're not the patients' we're talking would probably pass that day and the parents hadn't eaten in 3 days. I then got another warning for making the parents of a child just diagnosed with cancer (like literally that day) a cup of tea because I should have told them that there was a parents kitchen and had them make their own tea..

I stood up to my managers and now I'm facing disciplinary action for 'wasting ward resources'

So thank you Mumsnet for giving me the kick up the arse to join a union because if I hadn't and I'd disclosed to hr my concerns alone I wouldn't be in a job right now.

Also coming back to this. Does the consultant of the child know? I know we don't have anything like the power of back in the day, but if one of our nurses was in the shit for being compassionate to the parents of one of my patients, I would be prepared to do some shit stirring in her support.

No they don't know but I am extremely tempted to tell them, my union rep suggested getting witness statements

It is entirely up to you. But I would definitely want to know.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you've done for those patients, their parents, and doubtless 100's of others OP. To be reprimanded for this is an absolute disgrace, and the person who did it should be fired. No one this heartless should be working anywhere near the NHS. Good luck for your meeting.

So, you are a paediatric nurse who showed kindness to parents after their lives were turned upside down after receiving devastating news. And some absolute dipstick thought you should be disciplined.
My God what on earth is going on in the NHS these days.
I did 40 years as an RN and never ever came across anything like this.
Good luck for Friday.

mn is amazing! I love the way there's always someone on here and gosh replies come so fast!

OP you sound absolutely lovely. I'm so sorry you've been put in this awful position for being compassionate.

It resonates even more for me today as my DS has had a little op this afternoon and because of his autism found it so very difficult. His nurses have been superb - funny, caring, calm, reassuring and loving. Thank you so much for doing this job. You are incredible. ❤️

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c7287gxn7m3o

You are incredibly brave for blowing the whistle. The NHS is terrible in this regard, I have known a couple of people who did this and the treatment they received was appalling, to the point of them leaving and it badly affecting their mental health. Both have said that they would never do it again, now it would be keep quiet and heads down. What you are describing is punishment for being a whistleblower; working life is being made so uncomfortable for you so that you will drop your case and move on. The NHS is, sadly, populated by vindictive bullies like your manager who delight in making people's life a misery. I'm sure you do but when it comes to your clinical care do everything by the book and make sure your paperwork is spot on. Good luck.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c7287gxn7m3o

Bloody hell you're an amazing person OP, and I'm so glad you have decent representation. You sound caring and lovely.

Guess we also have an explanation for hoe people can give birth and go God knows how long without water or a piece of toast...based on this post, it seems that nurses obviously are threatened with losing their jobs if they do it!!

I'm so
Grateful for the responses! I'm nervous for Friday but I'm also calm? I know I didn't do anything wrong.

Thank you for the article!

Am completely shocked but sadly not surprised by this ridiculous behaviour of management. You absolutely made the right call in supporting the parents in this way. I was so grateful when waiting in an a&e trauma ward for tea and biscuits being brought to me by paramedics whilst waiting for news on my DH. Having to go and find food in hospitals is pretty horrendous and time consuming - really not practical to leave children.
Well done for joining a union and that you have a supportive rep!

I am a senior manager in the NHS and my role comes with having to commission investigations. My heart sinks when I learn a staff member doesn't have a union rep.

Anyone in public sector should be in a union

Anyone in public sector should be in a union.

Even if you don't have a recognised union in your place of work, be it public or private, you can be a union member and be entitled to have a rep attend any disciplinary with you.

Indeed. My rep today has been incredible. Well worth my monthly subs!

Wishing you all the very best for Friday, @Mamtorr .

Remember the Mumsnet Army have your back ! 💐 xx

I’m not in any way calling you/your role out but that statement speaks volumes and is frankly worrying.

Investigations need to happen. Thats part of having ‘appropriate’ checks and balances especially for the NHS. The word here is appropriate.

You've made me cry for those poor parents.
I'm attending the Beatson Hospital for Chemo and Radiation. When the volunteer team comes round with sandwiches, biscuits, tea, soup etc everyone gets something to eat (if they can face it). Patients and the person with them, if they have one.
They even come round outpatients and the queue for bloods.
You go on Friday with your head held high, I'd be honoured to be nursed by you.

Good luck for Friday 💪🏾💪🏾
I had a little cry reading your OP, you sound like the nurse I wish I had when I was ill last year. The ones looking after me were really quite horrible but not you, you're lovely x

I came on to mention the wonderful work that Sophie’s Legacy are doing to make sure that parents of paediatric patients are fed in hospitals but I see someone has already done so! They really are a fantastic charity working hard to create change.

Years ago there was a mum on here posting about staying with her terminally ill child in hospital. She couldn't leave the child and had no other support. She described how the nursing staff wouldn't even allow her to eat the meals served to her daughter (who was unable to eat anyway), grabbing the untouched food and taking it away. I think some local MNers organised some food deliveries. I don't think there was anything like the delivery services we have now. Some of the "older" people here might remember. It seems that not much has changed.

The worst thing about the whole thing is that we do 'cater' for parents. We were one of the pilot hospitals for Sophie's legacy boxes in the north, and on a Friday night we get a takeaway delivered by the teenage cancer trust / another charity up here but it was the fact that I specifically ordered a patient meal for her parents because they hadn't left the ward in 3 days and it wasn't a Friday / Saturday night that I got the warning.

Then the other one was i should have told another set of parents that they could make themselves a brew instead of making a cup of tea for them 5 minutes after they had been told their child had cancer and would be admitted to start chemo
Immediately.

My unison rep has been incredible and says she can't wait to get her teeth into my manager on Friday.

We have those on the "fifth floor" of my hospital. Trust. They do literally wield clipboards!

It’s unbelievable.

Just out of interest, how do they know you made them a cup of tea? Are they literally watching all the time or has someone else also escalated?