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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Why do husbands act like cxnts

57 replies

smxlly · 06/07/2024 23:57

Had a disagreement with my husband. Who is in the wrong - he seems to think it's all my fault.

Some lady made a joke with her colleague and I heard it and laughed. An he came over to speak - but was really trying to talk to my husband. Even to the point to touch his shoulder to get his attention.

He turns to me and said why did you have to laugh she came over and spoke to me. Basically blaming me and he was really pissed off at me (his ocd and doesn't like people on his personal space)

Got out of the shop and because I said it's not my fault she touched you and spoke to you, he told me to shut up and then threatens to leave me in the car park (we were a 3 mile drive from home and I am 6 weeks pregnant), he turned really nasty. He proceeds to tell me to not talk to anyone else in the future and don't make eye contact with strangers. He said I ruined our shopping trip,

I am so pissed off at him for blaming me, I told him if you felt uncomfortable you should have said something to her. I actually think I hate him (maybe it's heightened emotions or hormones) it's like walking on egg shells around him and I'm fucking sick of it.

OP posts:
comedycentral · 06/07/2024 23:59

This isn't typical husband behaviour lovely. It's abusive partner behaviour.

AquaFurball · 07/07/2024 00:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

loropianalover · 07/07/2024 00:00

What would you say to a pregnant friend if she told you this story?

redastherose · 07/07/2024 00:01

I'm sorry but that's not a normal interaction and his behaviour towards you is shocking. It obviously wasn't your fault someone tried to talk to him regardless of whether you'd laughed at something you heard said. I think you need to think seriously whether you want to stay with someone who can threaten to leave you 3 miles away from home even if you weren't pregnant.

TheBottomsOfMyTrousersAreRolled · 07/07/2024 00:04

he turned really nasty. He proceeds to tell me to not talk to anyone else in the future

run now. Far. And fast. He isnt normal. This is appallingly controlling. Abuse frequently starts in pregnancy.

husband‘s arent like this, abusers are.

leave before you get stuck for years.

MrsTerryPratchett · 07/07/2024 00:05

He's abusive and controlling and I wouldn't have a baby with him.

Most men aren't cunts. Yours is.

pikkumyy77 · 07/07/2024 00:05

Yikes! LTB.

QueenBitch666 · 07/07/2024 00:06

Your bar is dragging on the floor. Raise your standards

Karmaisac4t · 07/07/2024 00:07

Time to leave him and think about your future while you can.

LiterallyOnFire · 07/07/2024 00:08

Not all men are like that.

Yours is abusive and you should think about escaping before he escalates. They always escalate.

GiveOverAndOver · 07/07/2024 00:35

Husbands are not like this. He's a total twat. I dont know any husband who would act like that.

Original poster
smxlly · 07/07/2024 00:38

I'm glad I'm not the only one that sees his cunty ways. I can't stand him right now.

OP posts:
Twilight7777 · 07/07/2024 00:46

He’s an abusive asshat, leave him! You’ll never be able to trust him not to turn on the baby.

Runnerinthenight · 07/07/2024 01:01

He's a fucking dick and you would be best out of it. It's complicated by your being pregnant but sorry to say you don't need to stay pregnant.

Best wishes x

Devilsmommy · 07/07/2024 01:03

comedycentral · 06/07/2024 23:59

This isn't typical husband behaviour lovely. It's abusive partner behaviour.

Edited

As usual, first post nailed it

SaltedCaramelIcedLatte · 07/07/2024 01:08

smxlly · 07/07/2024 00:38

I'm glad I'm not the only one that sees his cunty ways. I can't stand him right now.

So what are you going to do?

MonsteraMama · 07/07/2024 01:14

Yes how dare you look at someone or laugh or interact with strangers, didn't you know you're supposed to walk one step behind him looking at the floor with your hands neatly clasped in front of you until he gives you an instruction?

This isn't husband behaviour, this is abusive wanker behaviour. I'm sure you're worthy of better than this!

SwordToFlamethrower · 07/07/2024 01:16

Do you really want him to be the father of your baby, and to be tied to him for the rest of your life?

Please, please do not waste your one precious life, shackled to this vile man. You absolutely have a choice here.if he can treat you like this when you're carrying a baby, what will he be like when you're reliant on him when the baby arrives? He won't care for you, he won't protect you, he won't treat you well at all. Imagine how he will treat the baby! He will be abusive to your child too and worse, your child will learn to be abusive as well and there will be two of them at it.

OhcantthInkofaname · 07/07/2024 02:58

Protect yourself.

Aquamarine1029 · 07/07/2024 03:02

You have a chance to make a completely free break from this man. You need to think very, very carefully right now while you still have options available to you. Your husband will not change for the better, and I can guarantee his abusive behaviour will escalate. Don't be tied to this man.

PinkyFlamingo · 07/07/2024 03:05

smxlly · 07/07/2024 00:38

I'm glad I'm not the only one that sees his cunty ways. I can't stand him right now.

What does it matter what we all think though really, surely you should know yourself this isn't normal behaviour which will only get worse as your pregnancy goes on.

LizzeyBenett · 07/07/2024 03:08

That's not Cun** that's abuse , controlling and gaslighting.

GoneFishingToday · 07/07/2024 03:17

Unless you are absolutely DESPERATE for a child OP, have had fertility problems, etc., and are prepared to be a single Mum, then please terminate this pregnancy a.s.a.p. and walk away from this abusive partner NOW!!

Meadowfinch · 07/07/2024 03:38

He threatened to leave you to walk home! Told you not to talk to anyone, or make eye contact with anyone. Surely you're not serious?

Why are you with him? Can't you see that as threatening and controlling? Why would you tie yourself to such a creep?

pasturesgreen · 07/07/2024 03:43

He proceeds to tell me to not talk to anyone else in the future and don't make eye contact with strangers. He said I ruined our shopping trip.

So many red flags here, I don't know where to start...