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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Boyfriend says he doesn’t feel “as close to me”

64 replies

Pineapple996 · 05/07/2024 05:06

I’m convinced this means he doesn’t love me as much anymore but he’s insisting it’s not. He said that there’s certain things I’m doing that are trying to push him away.
He doesn’t feel “as close to me as he used to”. This upsets me so much. We’ve had quite a good week but he still thinks this.

I am undergoing mental health tests including ashe and he said the best way for him to feel close to me again is carrying on seeking help.

There’s certain things I do that he says push him away. For example I have a tendency to drag arguments out rather than let things go, because I find it hard to let things go and I always linger on things, ask more questions or dwell on things. This is hugely part of my personality. I also have trust issues which is a large part of this, I’m always asking him question about how he feels about me and need reassurance. Finally he says that when he wants to talk about his feelings, I turn it around on me and only talk about myself. I always just think I’m being empathetic or agreeing with him. Either that or I interrupt him, which I’m trying hard to stop doing.

I just feel a bit heartbroken. I feel he’s saying he’ll feel closer to me again if I change my personality.

Am I in the wrong here?

OP posts:
Pineapple996 · 05/07/2024 05:07

Adhd** not Ashe

OP posts:
LiterallyOnFire · 05/07/2024 05:09

Why bring it up now when you're already embarked on assessment/treatment? Why not wait until you have answers?

It fees a little bit manipulative to me.

Do you live together? How old are you? How long have you been together?

Nottherealslimshady · 05/07/2024 05:11

If you agree that you're doing those things then yeah he's right. You're dragging out arguments, don't trust him and don't let him talk about his emotions. That's not a great relationship to be in is it? Saying "that's just how I am" isn't fair.

Pineapple996 · 05/07/2024 05:12

We live together and 28. He has brought it up before and I asked him again yesterday, he got irritated at me for not listening to him when he was talking about his feelings. I only agreed with something he said to empathise with him

OP posts:
LiterallyOnFire · 05/07/2024 05:28

So you didn't really agree? But pretended you did as an opportunity to empathise performatively? That's a bad idea.

You need a trick or mechanism to stop yourself badgering away at things.

Hecatoncheires · 05/07/2024 05:33

When you say you agreed, do you mean you said something like “oh, yes, same for me - I’m the same”? That can be annoying. For example, if I say to my DH that I have a headache or feel a cold coming on he will often say “yeah, me too” then witter on about how he’s feeling. So he’s turned it onto him. And it pisses me off.

lemonmeringueno3 · 05/07/2024 05:35

Well I do think people are allowed to say if they're not happy in a relationship.

When people post here about being ghosted, or dumped, or their partner has an affair everyone always says 'they should have told you how they were feeling'.

You can't make him feel a different way. The choices are him being honest with you or not telling you at all.

It sounds as if he's encouraging you to continue seeking help, saying that it's really important to him that you do, which isn't unreasonable.

If you don't agree then you are not compatible.

MoveToParis · 05/07/2024 05:36

Pineapple996 · 05/07/2024 05:06

I’m convinced this means he doesn’t love me as much anymore but he’s insisting it’s not. He said that there’s certain things I’m doing that are trying to push him away.
He doesn’t feel “as close to me as he used to”. This upsets me so much. We’ve had quite a good week but he still thinks this.

I am undergoing mental health tests including ashe and he said the best way for him to feel close to me again is carrying on seeking help.

There’s certain things I do that he says push him away. For example I have a tendency to drag arguments out rather than let things go, because I find it hard to let things go and I always linger on things, ask more questions or dwell on things. This is hugely part of my personality. I also have trust issues which is a large part of this, I’m always asking him question about how he feels about me and need reassurance. Finally he says that when he wants to talk about his feelings, I turn it around on me and only talk about myself. I always just think I’m being empathetic or agreeing with him. Either that or I interrupt him, which I’m trying hard to stop doing.

I just feel a bit heartbroken. I feel he’s saying he’ll feel closer to me again if I change my personality.

Am I in the wrong here?

Dragging out arguments isn’t part of your personality- it’s just a bad and destructive habit.

Nobody likes living like that, and trying to justify it and make it ok is absolutely shocking.

It’s the same with the constant need for reassurance. Try just enjoying the relationship and recognizing that if it ends you’ll be able to cope with it.

Again, your behaviour is destroying the relationship.

LiterallyOnFire · 05/07/2024 05:37

Are you basically in a panic spiral, OP?

You badger him for answers and when he tries to produce one, you're devastated? Is that it?

Doesn't that always make things worse?

Don't you trust the assessment process you're going through?

Try to step back a bit and look at the pattern. There's no emergency. You're not splitting. Certainly not today.

BifurBofurBombur · 05/07/2024 05:54

For example I have a tendency to drag arguments out rather than let things go, because I find it hard to let things go and I always linger on things, ask more questions or dwell on things. This is hugely part of my personality. I also have trust issues which is a large part of this, I’m always asking him question about how he feels about me and need reassurance.

I couldn’t live like this, it feels very needy. If you’re aware your doing these things, you can stop. You can’t just say ‘but that’s just me’ and keep doing it.

Azandme · 05/07/2024 05:59

Nottherealslimshady · 05/07/2024 05:11

If you agree that you're doing those things then yeah he's right. You're dragging out arguments, don't trust him and don't let him talk about his emotions. That's not a great relationship to be in is it? Saying "that's just how I am" isn't fair.

This.

GreyCarpet · 05/07/2024 06:19

Pineapple996 · 05/07/2024 05:12

We live together and 28. He has brought it up before and I asked him again yesterday, he got irritated at me for not listening to him when he was talking about his feelings. I only agreed with something he said to empathise with him

And this

I also have trust issues which is a large part of this, I’m always asking him question about how he feels about me and need reassurance. Finally he says that when he wants to talk about his feelings, I turn it around on me and only talk about myself. I always just think I’m being empathetic or agreeing with him. Either that or I interrupt him, which I’m trying hard to stop doing.

OK, OP. I have some personal experience of this.

Firstly, I was told that sharing a personal experience of similar/sharing how you dealt with a situation etc was a good way of demonstrating empathy. And it can be. However, in recent years, though, I've read a lot about not doing this and posts on FB which essentially say, "Let's normalise not sharing our own story to show that we empathise."

Which is very confusing!

What it really means is that when someone is telling you something about themselves or sharing their own story, it's important to give them the space to tell it and share before you say anything. Then talk about them and how they are feeling (if they want to) rather than bringing your own experiences into it at all.

Sometimes, when you're struggling with your own mental health what happens is that someone says something which triggers your own brain to start processing your own issues (whatever they may be) and whilst it feels to you like you are empathising, what you are actually doing is trauma dumping your own stuff without realising.

I say this because a) I've done it and b) I've had people do it to me so I know what it feels like to be on both sides. I felt I was empathising but I wasn't really. I'd been 'triggered' (hate that expression! 😅) and my amygdala had taken over so I was no longer able to consider the other person and I was just reliving my own shit. Even though I felt like I was empathising. I wasn't. It took someone pulling me up on it to realise I was doing it.

If you are still dealing with your own MH issues, there's a chance you are doing similar.

Imagine if every time you tried to talk to someone about how you were feeling, they took over talking about themselves and how they felt. You wouldn't felt heard or understood and you would feel shut down and frustrated. That wouldn't make you feel close to them.

Constantly seeking reassurances etc because you don't trust someone is pushing them away. You might feel that the reassurances make you feel closer to them but, again, imagine how it looks from the other side.

Your relationship becomes less about what you do together, having fun, building a shared life together and more about the other person reassuring you that they want to be with you to do all those things but without actually having the opportunity to do them because the relationship has become about The Relationship. It pushes people away.

Constantly asking someone creates the distance you fear.

I've had experience of someone doing this to me and, tbh, it's what killed the relationship. The constant need for reasirance, constant scrutiny of everything I did and analysing what it meant and feeling berated and not able to be myself was just too much in the end. I stopped feeling like we were in a relationship together and began to feel like my only function was being 'his girlfriend' and it all (and only) became about how he was feeling.

So, unfortunately, yes, your behaviour will he making him feel less close to you.

GreyCarpet · 05/07/2024 06:26

I just feel a bit heartbroken. I feel he’s saying he’ll feel closer to me again if I change my personality

He's not asking you to change your personality, he's asking you to learn to regulate your emotions and to manage your behaviour as a result, which we all have a responsibility to do.

FlannelCure · 05/07/2024 06:58

A lot of what you have described is how I acted in a past relationship and it wasn’t an enjoyable relationship for either of us. To be fair, a lot of it stemmed from trust issues caused by his behaviour, but I also had a lot of maturing to do. I wouldn’t dream of acting like that now as in hindsight I can see how terribly destructive it can be. Is this your first long term relationship? If you’re determined this is the right person for you and it has the potential to be a healthy relationship, you need to do some work on yourself and find the root of these insecurities. It can’t be nice for him to be on the receiving end.

As a side note, my DH is my favourite person to spend time with and I love him deeply, but there have been times when I’ve felt painfully distant from him. At no point did I stop loving him or investing in the relationship. One of the things that helped bring the closeness back was being able to openly discuss it.

Shoxfordian · 05/07/2024 06:58

It's not OK to just accept negative behaviour from yourself as just your personality and not try to be better, he's entitled to feel how he does when he's told you these things upset him

FlannelCure · 05/07/2024 07:00

Forgot to add. Telling your story that relates to show empathy is classic ADHD/ND and one of the traits that you can learn to manage.

RunningThroughMyHead · 05/07/2024 07:02

It can be hard living with someone with mental health issues and insecurities, but that would rarely be a reason to end things if your relationship is healthy, happy and established.

Sometimes relationships just don't work out OP. Yours may or may not but for now you need to focus on you. It sounds like it's common for you to push him for emotional responses and reassurance which he has communicated is off-putting for him (it would be off-putting for me too whilst some wouldn't mind). So try not to do that.

But sometimes you just need to accept that you're two different people who may not be compatible enough to sustain a long term relationship, that's ok, there are other potential partners out there.

MissingKitty · 05/07/2024 07:04

Well he’s certainly not in the wrong is he. You can’t manipulate him into feeling differently. He’s right you need to carry on working on your mental health to manage your destructive habits.

Butchyrestingface · 05/07/2024 07:05

There’s certain things I do that he says push him away. For example I have a tendency to drag arguments out rather than let things go, because I find it hard to let things go and I always linger on things, ask more questions or dwell on things. This is hugely part of my personality. I also have trust issues which is a large part of this, I’m always asking him question about how he feels about me and need reassurance. Finally he says that when he wants to talk about his feelings, I turn it around on me and only talk about myself. I always just think I’m being empathetic or agreeing with him. Either that or I interrupt him, which I’m trying hard to stop doing

I couldn’t cope with that either.

StormingNorman · 05/07/2024 07:07

Your behaviour would be hard to live with and MH is not an excuse.

CrunchyCarrot · 05/07/2024 07:09

Kindly said, I think you are probably not in a good place to have a relationship with anyone right now until you work through your issues, OP. I think even if you were with another person the same things would crop up, therefore you owe it to yourself to sort those out.

EveningSpread · 05/07/2024 07:15

If it’s exactly as you’ve told it OP then you can work on these problems you’ve identified - and there’s some really good advice above about not seeing negative traits as integral to your personality.

I may be projecting, but is there any chance he is manipulating you? If you’re sure you’re the problem that’s great in a way as you can address it. But my ex used to say these things about me while in fact it was him who couldn’t (a) discuss and resolve issues, so he accused me of dragging things out, and (b) who made everything about him and his emotions. I too sought therapy, but actually my ex was the gaslighty, manipulative, emotionally unavailable problem - and now I’m in a healthy relationship that’s abundantly clear.

faceid81 · 05/07/2024 08:26

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Deliaskis · 05/07/2024 08:44

Yes your behaviour drains him and it does push him away. I had a friend like this and the only way I could explain it was that every time they asked for reassurance (without a sensible reason) or did something that showed they didn't trust me... Every time, it cost me. It cost me hurt feelings. I tried to be understanding and to consider where it was coming from within them, but you can't do that forever because it damages you. Every time they did that it hurt me, and eventually I just backed off because I couldn't let myself be hurt anymore.

Some might say why does it cost you to reassure somebody you love? It does. Because every time they do this kind of thing they're saying they don't believe your, they have no faith in you, and every time it hurts.

So it isn't just your personality, it's your behaviour, and the way you are behaving is hurting him. Every single time.

I'm not trying to be unkind, I just wanted to be really clear about what this does to the other person. It's absolutely not harmless, it's not ok, and it's not healthy to be the other person in a relationship like this.

I kindly recommend you deal with your own mental and emotional health issues before being in a relationship.

It may be a longb journey for you but I truly do wish you a happier and healthier future.

Idontjetwashthefucker · 05/07/2024 08:58

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

There's nothing to suggest that whatsoever. OP you agree with him that you're doing the things he doesn't like but keep doing them anyway, you do need to work on yourself otherwise you're going to drive him away