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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

WIBU to tell dog owner in park they should have better recall?

56 replies

Melawati · 02/07/2024 08:35

Every morning I walk with my autistic teenage DD to the station, she gets on the train to school in one direction and I get on the train to work the opposite way.
Last bit of the walk cuts through a park, not really fully in it, past the car park, tennis courts and couple of gates out on to the very busy road.
This morning, we were just at the edge of the car park when a medium sized dog came racing over to us, jumped up at DD, jumped up at me, licked my hand. We had to stop walking, or could have kicked it, as it was bouncing round our legs.
Looked around and two people holding leads are chatting over by the tennis courts, so I called out ‘hey, you need to call this dog’. The owner did but dog did not respond, after a few tries they walked over but the dog was not having any of it still bouncing about/jumping up. Dog owner says ‘oh it’s a game now’. I said ‘you really need to have better recall’, and then again in a bit sharper/louder tone. I was getting a bit annoyed tbh as wanted to get to the station not at the last minute so DD could get on her train calmly.
Dog owner walked a bit to the side eventually and dog followed so we could walk on.
DD said I was being embarrassing but I feel it’s not unreasonable to expect a dog in a busy city park to have good recall and for people to keep more of an eye on an off lead dog near a busy road & car park.

OP posts:
WednesdayWeWearPink · 02/07/2024 08:38

Not unreasonable at all. If someone is going to have their dog out in public, then they need to keep it under control. Don’t give a damn if it’s a friendly excited dog.

I don’t let my toddler run around unsupervised or go and bother strangers. Not sure why it should be different for dogs.

FloofPaws · 02/07/2024 08:39

That's not great! Dogs do need to be trained recall, which takes time, but dog owners attitude was very poor here!

Misthios · 02/07/2024 08:40

We had to stop walking, or could have kicked it, as it was bouncing round our legs.

I would have kicked it! Just one of the many entitled owners who can’t be arsed to train their fur baby and thinks everyone should be delighted to be jumped up at and licked.

CelesteCunningham · 02/07/2024 08:42

Dog owners like this are the reason I have two DC who hate dogs.

StripedTomatoes · 02/07/2024 08:44

I would also have kept walking even if that meant kicking the stupid dog.

WetBandits · 02/07/2024 08:45

Misthios · 02/07/2024 08:40

We had to stop walking, or could have kicked it, as it was bouncing round our legs.

I would have kicked it! Just one of the many entitled owners who can’t be arsed to train their fur baby and thinks everyone should be delighted to be jumped up at and licked.

Why would you kick it? Not the dog’s fault it has shit owners!

RedOrBlueOrYellow · 02/07/2024 08:45

Yanbu

Dogs should be on leads if they have poor recall. They shouldn't bother others. I have 2 dogs and find it annoying when other dogs run at us and aren't properly controlled.

ACynicalDad · 02/07/2024 08:47

Most dogs know at least the sit command so in that situation shout sit several times. But you are not in any way unreasonable.

Motomum23 · 02/07/2024 08:47

I would have kept walking regardless - standing still because there is a dog jumping around you is a bit silly. That being said my kids are terrified of dogs and I would have been forced to have grabbed dog bh collar and take it back to Owner in your situation as my 6 year old vomits when she is afraid.

MissyB1 · 02/07/2024 08:50

No one shoukd be kicking dogs, just as no one should be kicking out of control kids. Dog owners and parents are the ones responsible for both!

My dog is on lead in car parks and near any road. She has good recall anyway and is never far enough away from me that I couldn't grab hold of her.

That owner needs to take better care of their dog, those kind of owners really are like the parents who never bother watching their kids. It's that same lazy clueless behaviour.

WillimNot · 02/07/2024 08:51

All incidents like this should be reported to the dog warden. It's about time last owners were fined for incidents like this and, if repeatedly reported the dogs should be removed from them and a ban in ownership instigated.

It's always the same type who see their dog as either a weapon or an accessory that have no skills in handling.

Thank goodness it was just annoying rather than the alternative.

And yes, I would lightly kick a dog which was putting my child's safety at risk, no question. Not hard enough to maim the animals but enough to warn it off.

godmum56 · 02/07/2024 08:57

ex dog owner and dog lover here. You were absolutely right to comment, I have done so myself when its was my dogs being harassed. They give the rest of us a bad name.

Westfacing · 02/07/2024 08:57

I'm afraid there are so many useless dog owners out there. On the way to the park you can see them being dragged along by the dog on its lead, then in the park the dogs are running all over the place, including the flower beds.

HighHeelsOnCobblestones · 02/07/2024 09:15

YANBU. It’s not ok for dogs to be coming up to strangers and certainly not to be jumping up and licking them.

My DS is very allergic. Last time a dog got close enough to pant on him, he swelled up. His reactions have only gotten worse; now he can’t even be in a room with a dog, last time needed an ambulance for serious breathing difficulties. Now has an allergic asthma diagnosis. There’s a high chance we’d have another trip to A&E if a dog licked him or got close enough to jump on him. Needless to say, we don’t take any chances and avoid going in cafes/pubs/shops/etc that allow dogs but it scares me how some dog owners allow their poorly trained pets off lead, approaching strangers and make no attempt to keep them away or recall the dog. We’ve had so many close calls and there’s parks and woods we can’t walk in anymore because it’s just got worse over recent years. “Oh don’t worry, he’s friendly” they say as their dog comes over and they see us looking scared and getting the hell away. Well I’m sure your dog is lovely but I’m also sure my son will have a serious reaction to it. Of course it’s not all, but some dog owners don’t seem to realise that not everyone loves their dog as much as they do. Everyone should be able to walk down the street, visit parks, walk in woods etc without being bothered by someone else’s pet. Those who are allergic to dogs should not be put at risk from someone else’s choice to own a pet.

We would have kept walking, even if that risked kicking the dog. Staying still would put DS more at risk.

Misthios · 02/07/2024 09:32

WetBandits · 02/07/2024 08:45

Why would you kick it? Not the dog’s fault it has shit owners!

What I mean is that I wouldn’t have stopped walking. If that meant the dog got inadvertently kicked, too bad.

Whatshappning · 02/07/2024 09:39

My friends toddler loves dogs. But she hates dogs jumping up and licking him because his face goes bright red due to allergies.

I’m not allergic to dogs but I’d have been cross if one licked me as I think it’s unhygienic so I’d have been really annoyed.

I also feel it’s quite inconsiderate of them to let their dogs behave that way because they can easily trip someone up especially an older or disabled person who has balance or mobility issues.

End of the day the law says all dogs must be under control, if it’s off leash and jumping up at people who haven’t encouraged it do so, that means it’s out of control.

We need more dog wardens because parks are turning into a no-go area for a lot of people now due to this behaviour.

Whatshappning · 02/07/2024 09:47

WillimNot · 02/07/2024 08:51

All incidents like this should be reported to the dog warden. It's about time last owners were fined for incidents like this and, if repeatedly reported the dogs should be removed from them and a ban in ownership instigated.

It's always the same type who see their dog as either a weapon or an accessory that have no skills in handling.

Thank goodness it was just annoying rather than the alternative.

And yes, I would lightly kick a dog which was putting my child's safety at risk, no question. Not hard enough to maim the animals but enough to warn it off.

I was on holiday once and waiting in the hotel lobby for a friend. A small-ish yappy dog came in all wet and bouncing around at people even though on leash. A man shouted at it to get off him and the stupid owner just stood there. It continued to jump up frantically at this man.

He kicked it twice! The whole episode was pretty bizarre but I guess we don’t know peoples past histories with dogs and really the owner was at fault for letting it escalate.

And to be fair it did stop jumping up at him after that.

AmelieTaylor · 02/07/2024 09:52

Misthios · 02/07/2024 08:40

We had to stop walking, or could have kicked it, as it was bouncing round our legs.

I would have kicked it! Just one of the many entitled owners who can’t be arsed to train their fur baby and thinks everyone should be delighted to be jumped up at and licked.

@Misthios @Melawati

whilst I agree the owner needs to train better recall. Why the hell would you want to kick a (any but especially a friendly) dog?

AmelieTaylor · 02/07/2024 09:56

WillimNot · 02/07/2024 08:51

All incidents like this should be reported to the dog warden. It's about time last owners were fined for incidents like this and, if repeatedly reported the dogs should be removed from them and a ban in ownership instigated.

It's always the same type who see their dog as either a weapon or an accessory that have no skills in handling.

Thank goodness it was just annoying rather than the alternative.

And yes, I would lightly kick a dog which was putting my child's safety at risk, no question. Not hard enough to maim the animals but enough to warn it off.

@WillimNot

the teenager was not 'at risk' other than being licked, and like most teenagers, was embarrassed by her parent.

KeirSpoutsTwaddle · 02/07/2024 10:00

Keep walking, no eye contact. Dogs respond to attention and they read your body language. All attention is good attention, like with toddlers.

Cold shoulder usually works.

BoudiccaOfSuburbia · 02/07/2024 10:58

Dogs should be on leads if they are not under control.

And in addition to recall should be trained not to jump up at strangers. Who cares if it is ‘being friendly’? No one wants paw marks in their work clothes or dog saliva on their hand.

Let alone the issues for small children and others who find dogs alarming.

Fraaahnces · 02/07/2024 11:07

I would never kick it, but agree with your frustration. “Get your fucking dog!” Is an appropriate response. As is “Not everyone thinks it’s as cute as you do, you know…”

Mosaic123 · 02/07/2024 11:12

I would freeze and hope the animal goes away.

I am not friendly or interested in dogs.

People can be so selfish.

SmellsLikeMiddleAgeSpirit · 02/07/2024 11:18

YANBU OP, and I say that as a dog owner. My dog has good recall, but even then is ways on the lead in public places.

It would be very unreasonable to kick (or risk kicking) the poor animal as quite a few have advocated... it's the owner's fault the dog was being a bother.

Whatshappning · 02/07/2024 11:28

AmelieTaylor · 02/07/2024 09:56

@WillimNot

the teenager was not 'at risk' other than being licked, and like most teenagers, was embarrassed by her parent.

How do you know they’re not at risk? plenty of “friendly” dogs bite “unexpectedly”. And the owner ALWAYS claims “they’ve never done that before” 🙄

If a dog is off leash and close enough to jump on me, it’s close enough to bite. That’s a very real risk. Thousands of people attend the NHS each year due to dog bites.

The last time a dog jumped on me thankfully it didn’t bite me but it did scratch me, thanks to my thick trousers it didn’t break skin but my leg was a bit tender for a few hours after that. Had I been wearing something like shorts and it made direct contact with my skin, there’s a high possibility the sharp claws would’ve done more damage.

Dogs have sharp teeth and claws and can be unpredictable, that’s why the law says they must be under control to minimise the risk of harming others .

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