To think this is absolutely joyless of nursery?

[Bettycrockered]

DD attends a private nursery and if you want to, on their birthdays you send them in with a shop brought cake and some candles. Everyone sings happy birthday and the cake gets shared out.

There is around 40 kids in the room, so an average of one birthday a week. By the time the cake is cut down to share, each kid gets a small cube of sponge and jam.

one of the parents via a nursery/parent forum has complained that they feel the cube of cake a few times a month is excessive sugar and so now there’s no birthday cake. On their birthday, the child sits in a chair and everyone sings happy birthday. Once a month the chef will instead bake a sugar free cake for each room and they have a little party instead.

AIBU to think this is totally joyless? DD doesn’t even like cake so I’ve seen the minuscule cubes of cake that come home with her. The meal plan at the nursery is really nutritious and varied - a little cube of sponge cake surely isn’t that big an issue? They could always alternate the children’s pudding with the cake rather than getting rid of it.

YABU - kids eat too much sugar as it is
YANBU - moderation is fine

Theres always cake in my house. I love cake and to bake. Doesn’t have to be a birthday. I take cakes into work for my birthday, workiversary, if there’s a n in the day. I had a lemon drizzle cupcake today as I made some at the weekend. I have great memories of baking with my gran. My children would have cake on their birthday and probably for the rest of the week. I think I might have to get another one of those cupcakes

Cake is for special occasions, not weekly?! Plus a lot of the kids will attend parties, parents will give them puddings, weekend treats, day out treat... Amount of sugar very quickly adds up.

The obsession with sugar has become ridiculous. Yes, it's not good for kids to have a diet full of sweets and fizzy pop but complaining about an occasional little bit of cake or similar is OTT and will cause the kids to go off the rails food wise when they get older. Sugar free cake sounds grim and like.y full of additives. Obviously this refers to kids with no health issues, I know some people have medical diets which are a different matter.

This sounds amazing. I wish I could have your discipline!!

I eat ours! Bloody lovely. Usually as a breakfast snack with tea 😂

Kids are being peddled sugar all the time, and it's so bad for them, sounds like a good idea to me. They will have a fab time anyway without it.

I really do think cake once a week is excessive. Not because of the sugar consumption, but because cake for your birthday is a special event and it all becomes a bit much if there's cake at home for your birthday and at nursery every week for everyone else's. It must be a faff for the staff as well if this is happening every week. Lots of nurseries have everyone sing happy birthday and the children get a sticker and a special shiny pencil or something like that. The kids are always really pleased.

You’d begrudge a child a birthday ffs remember that a child

No it isn't. It is cunty getting things banned for everyone just because you don't like them.

Kids like to share and take things in, it's part of the fun of it.

A mouthful of cake once a week is hardly excessive.

I specifically asked for balloons for my birthday in the office. I supplied the cake 🎂

Mashed banana and/or apple sauce. Sugar free cakes use natural sweeteners.

How do so many posters not know this?

I’m not saying I would be that person to complain…. I’m saying I don’t think it’s a bad thing when nurseries/schools don’t let parents send in birthday cake/sweets to share every week.

Exactly, not sugar free at all, so total window dressing. Fruit sugar is sugar, maybe surrounded by other good stuff, but it’s fanciful to say it’s sugar free. White caster sugar free, maybe.

I was a child who grew up with a shit diet, - sugar, fats, very little fresh fruit and veg. It has affected my weight all through my adult life, constant dieting. I'm now on an even keel as I've learnt to avoid sugar and processed foods and to eat lots of fruit and veg. But it has taken decades. I wish my mother had been as educated as the mother at this nursery.

At my school, birthday child took in a couple of bags of funsize choc bars and walked the room giving them out in a tray. 30 kids so not far off op's nursery. 80s kids were much healthier than nowadays 👍

Hmmmmm I'm torn.

I love a bit of cake and the joy when kids get to eat a treat is lovely. BUT. I'm glad our nursery doesn't allow this as DD has an egg allergy and 1.) it would be a risk to her as she would do anything to get a treat and they have to watch her like a hawk and 2.) She would be devastated seeing the others eating cake and being left out.
Yes , life is hard and she will have to get used to this, or finding alternatives, but whilst she is still little the sadness in her face at friends parties is a lot. Even when we bring alternatives.

Also, I do respect that sugar isn't actually great for us, so I get why some parents are strict on it

When my dc were in nursery the assistant took the birthday child into the kitchenette and they baked a cake together. Birthday child picked out the colour for the icing and the cake was shared at snack time. It was a lovely treat and my dcs remember it fondly.

Some of you would have a fit of the vapours if I told you what the weekly Sunday menu was like at my grandma's back in the 80s. Mr Kipling's french fancies, homemade Victoria sponge, and jelly, all on the same table and all up for grabs. I know times have changed but we were not overweight and we didn't have bad teeth. Sunday tea was a weekly treat, the rest of the week things were much more sedate.

The fructose in a strawberry or banana is sugar, but it's not refined, processed sugar. There's a big difference.

Probably because, like you say, it was a weekly treat. Now a days it’s often ‘treats’ every day, everywhere you look 🤦🏼‍♀️

Totally joyless - everyone always sent in cakes for pre-school birthdays and nearly all kids in our primary school bring cakes or sweets in for their birthdays (mini packs of haribo are the favourite). This happens all through Primary school. You might want to let the Mum know there’s a cake sale nearly every week at Primary school (slight exaggeration but it sometimes feels that way!)😆 Hope she’s not coming for the cake sales next 😅

Modern times, brings us modern celebrations.
I have voted neither. I understand the nursery and the no sugar stuff as well as I understand that everyone loves birthday cake, because it is traditional, however if the tradition were to bring an apple to each child the kids would be expecting an apple.
I will continue eating cake BTW.

No there isn’t, not to your pancreas.

Mr Kipling choc slices, fondant fancies, cherry bakewells, vienetta all on offer in our house every week. No one overweight as we all used our legs and walked everywhere (still do if I can).

I pity the poor child if they can’t have a slice of their friends birthday cake at pre-school once…how sad.