To feel so upset and frustrated when things like this happen?

[sayhelloooo]

No one’s fault, just one of those things. Ds has weekly swimming lessons which aren’t cheap and for the past two weeks hasn’t been able to go because his costume has vanished. It turned up during the week but this morning had disappeared again. (Normally yes everything is ready but this week has been very disrupted.)

I am so frustrated and upset with myself I feel like crying. And yes am ordering him a new one!

You're getting an unnecessarily hard time here. It sounds like life has been full to the brim and the swimming kit has been the last straw for you and you understandably want to have a moan and stamp your feet. It's compounded by feeling like a bad mum.

Like others I lose things and I tend y have multiples to make my life easier. Things like uniforms. And when everything is going smoothly yes I check the bags the night before and I'm a model efficiency human. But when life is full and I'm frazzled I just don't and that will be the time that the shorts will be missing or I can't find a lunchbox you can guarantee.

Cut yourself some slack out the TV on and get find it buy some new shorts later. Yur kid won't be irreparably damaged by missing swimming one (or even three) weeks and it sounds like you could do with a lazy morning

Just keep spare trunks in your boot, try and preempt things like this as much as you can.

just stick a pair of underpants on him?

Swimming costumes are for sale at the pool.

Just saw your private pool does not have any.

My 3 kids have swimming on a Thursday. I stick all their towels and shorts and costumes in the wash as soon as we get home. Next day it’s all dry and I pack their swimming bags and stick them in the car ready for next week. Shorts for a 3 year old will be about £2 from Primark. Go and buy 3 pairs.

One of mine went through a stage of hiding things in footwear. Check your boots OP!

Swing by a supermarket on the way? I don't understand all this upset about a pair of trunks.

@ShallWeGoToTheFirepit op has said they live rurally so no nearby supermarket on the way. OP I would say this actually gets worse as they get older and you aren't in the changing room with them. Mine are early teens and do my head in with the amount of stuff they lose. I do recommend ordering a couple of spares of pretty much everything if you can afford to, a size up will be fine in an emergency and then they're not wasted.

I really don’t understand this. It isn’t growing legs and climbing out of the bag itself?
also they’re not expensive you can get cheap swimmers for a three year old for a fiver. I’d buy him a few pairs.
pack his bag and leave it in the car! Also pack if the day before so you’ve got time to plan if you can’t find his things again.

Yoir child doesnt have a pair of shorts or boxer ubderwear he could wear?

Why didn't you just send him in shorts / pants?

Why all the angst?

My Grandson has 5 pairs of swim shorts.
Surely you could nip to primark and buy a couple more pairs

So frustrating!

Has it gone through a wormhole to a parallel universe?

Go via Sainsbury's/Tesco etc and buy one.

Goggles are our killers, we are always losing them

lol this is turning into such a squabbly MM thread.

No one really wears trunks. All the girls and boys wear a long body costume (not sure what they’re called) or a two piece. The pool is quite chilly. I bought DS one from Next I think at the start of the year. And it’s never gone missing before except for this morning so sorry for not having three spares in case it did go missing … 😂 duly chastised.

I have 2 boys . We have a box for swimming kit. I have spares of everything. necessary to avoid that kind of stress .

Yes we all live close to a Primark.

They're small enough to get mixed up with the main washing, so could be in with your clothes or where the towels are kept.

The only way I could guarantee the continued safety of swimming costumes+towel for my kids was a rigid routine of

1. In the front door
2. Swimming costumes and towels in the washing machine to rinse (by themselves, so they didn't get mixed up with other washing)
3. Swimming bags hung up on their own hooks (so they didn't get mixed up with coats, book bags, under the beds, back of the sofa...)
4. Swimming costumes and towels drying (by themselves, so they didn't get mixed up with other washing)
5. Swimming costumes and towels back into the swimming bags, costumes on top, so they could be checked quickly
6. Night before swimming, open bags and check swimming costumes were still at the top

I also made a point of them having brightly coloured costumes and ridiculous, child's dream, velvety, favourite cartoon character towels so there was no danger of them disappearing into the airing cupboard for the next five years.

That rigidity was the only reason mine ever had more than one session in a pool. Didn't stop socks or anything else going missing - and it was only when I had the genius idea of trying a similar, rigid routine to train my muscle memory that I stopped losing keys/phone/bank cards/etc - but it worked for swimming.

My kids don't do swimming lessons but I feel you. This is a regular thing in our house with four kids there's always something we can't find.

I'm chronically disorganised though.l (I do have diagnosed ADHD so technically have that as an excuse, but it's not really - I'm just crap!) Dad pulls his weight (more so , if I'm honest) but because he's at work full time and I'm at home in the day time, it usually falls to me for these things and I'm awful and sadly my kids - who are helpful and lovely and do chores - are equally as bad as me.

Every new school year I start off with the best intentions for routines for things like this and within a week they're by the wayside and we muddle through 😆

I try and keep a few spares in the car of various things like cheap coats, wellies etc, and if I was doing swimming, a spare towel and trunks for that reason. I get them all from Vinted so it doesn't cost me quite as much and the either resell or pass on when they don't fit or no longer needed.

This is a deeply weird thread. OK, it's mildly frustrating when something you don't have a spare of isn't where you think you left it, but is it really worth this level of angst?

Your language is also very mysterious, OP you say the swimming costume had vanished before the last lesson, turned up during the week (where? in the bag it's supposed to live in?) and has now vanished again? You didn't remove it, you say your three year old is highly unlikely to have done so without telling you, and then you say your DH must have taken it but why would he remove a necessary piece of kit from a swimming bag? Have you actually asked him? What has any of this to do with you being ill? Are you suggesting your DH resented having to take your child swimming because you were ill, so hid the costume two weeks in a row?

That’s just family life.

This would drive me mad too. I rarely loose things, e.g I never have odd socks. I would be exactly like you wondering where something went years later.

Your DS is still little, he'll probably not be overly bothered about missing swimming. You have ordered a second pair of swimming trunks for the future. Not much else you can do. I know it's annoying missing something you've paid for but it's not the end of the world.

Something like this op? Sounds annoying, I find the same thing happens with pe kit if they're not washed and put straight into the pe bag and put with all the coats.