To think this nurse shouldn't have laughed / scoffed at me for asking for a room?

[supertrainers]

Last night at 3 am I had to take my DD to a and e as she was struggling with her breathing.

Unfortunately this coincided with me having been up all night already vomiting. Second night in a row. It's not a stomach bug, before anyone says I shouldn't have taken my child to the hospital.

I was feeling absolutely rotten. Two nights of no sleep, worry for my DD. Pain, nausea. Everything.

I'm familiar with the hospital as I have found myself many times in there with one of my children in the middle of the night.

Most of the time, we get offered a room, once we've been triaged. Not always, but more often than not. The room has a bed in it and we just stay in there and the doctors come in and out.

I said to the triage nurse last night that I was also feeling extremely unwell and are there any rooms we could possibly wait in. I said I'm sorry for asking and I wouldn't ask unless I really needed to.

She did a scoff / laugh at me for even asking. 9 times out of 10 we have a room and you scoff at me ? I was taken aback by it and in my horrible state for her to just laugh / scoff at me was super rude. I told her, I understand but I really don't appreciate you laughing at me for even asking. I'm really unwell and I wouldn't ask you. It's not very nice that you laughed.

She denied laughing at me. I left it at that and went and sat on the plastic chairs for 6 hours.

It was a visitor, not a patient. A hospital ward is not a cafe. There will be a cafe and shops within the hospital where visitors can buy drinks. Nurses have enough to do caring for patients without waiting on visitors too.

That’s good op.

Try and get an early night tonight. Sometimes parenting infants can be really tough 💐.

I mean people wait in the WR these days quite unwell and ten occupied Ambulances outside with sick people waiting for a room or trolley so no idea what you were even thinking

You are being over sensitive. A scoff is a pretty mild reaction.

Could the patient be left? In my example above I couldn't leave my small child. I'm fortunate that a lovely nurse came to my rescue and didn't tell me that a hospital ward was not a cafe, and I hadn't asked her for anything.

Complain to PALS. Staff should not take out their frustration at incivility, pressures and capacity issues on patients and families. We'd want to know if a member of our emergency department was behaving this way.

So they are still other people who are ill….?

Really? Why not? A decade you wouldn’t have seen people being put into cupboards with them being made into make shift cubicles, you do now, every single available space is used and yes that does mean people in inappropriate departments and wards because THERE IS NO OTHER SPACE. My best friend had to catheterise an elderly gentleman in urinary retention (a painful medical emergency) in the corner of the waiting room while her colleagues held a bed sheet round them for privacy as there literally wasn’t a single other available space. This is the real situation facing patients and staff. She was devastated at having to do this but there literally wasn’t any other option. So it actually wouldn’t surprise me at all if 80 year olds are in children’s EDs

Whilst she shouldn’t have laughed at you, there are people literally dying in A&E. They give rooms out to those who need it. I know someone who had meningitis recently and was on a trolley for nearly 3 days so I think it would be a little much to be given a room because you haven’t slept much and feel sick. You don’t ask, you don’t get though so provided you weren’t feeling entitled to one fair play.

It was unprofessional of her and in direct contradiction to her code of conduct. You are entitled to complain formally if you want to.

Seriously!!!! So PALs gets clogged up with pointless shit like this whilst those of us with ill kids fighting for treatment will need to battle a PALS waiting list too. 😡

9/10 you get a room.

Unfortunately, this is the 1/10 that you didn't.

Be assured most people will meet a vile NHS staff member on rare occasions.
NHS staff meet vile NHS users on every shift.
I'm not justifying NHS staff behaviour but there's a limit to everybody's patience and tolerance.

What is PALs going to do to an exhausted nurse fighting to get properly ill patients seen, moved on to wards in an nhs on its knees?

@Saffrony

Won't be any left to fight. We haven't seen the bottom of nurses leaving NHS.

Please read the post I was responding to.

I'm pretty sure she was laughing at the situation, like "Oh I wish we had loads of rooms for people to wait in" I don't believe that you get a room 9 out of 10 times and that she is a regular in that a&e because if she knew rooms are usually readily available, why would she laugh?
Which hospital was it?

OP this is one of those things that's impossible to judge unless we were there. You claimed she laughed at you. For all we know she could've just scoffed.

You're well enough now to be bored and starting a thread at 18:20 in the evening the day after you were up until the wee hours so I guess you must be feeling much better. There must be better uses of your time than this.

She shouldn’t have laughed but it’s impossible to advise without knowing the reason why you usually get a room.

On the face of it it would sound and incredibly unusual to the point of laughable request. Because the NHS is under so much pressure that a lot of the time there’s not even enough chairs for the patients. And any room you are waiting in is a room that can’t be used for consultations.

CBA.

That's fair enough but if you can't be arsed to read the thread then try not to merail it.

I didn't "merail" or even derail it at all!!! Don't be daft! You could either answer the question or not. HTF was my question derailing anything? Wise up!

It's not the same, they are accommodating the additional needs of your child. A parent who is ill but not actually ill enough to need medical care is not going to be prioritised for a room in children's A&E.
How would you feel if your daughter couldn't use this room because a parent wanted it for themselves? An autistic child or adult could be so overwhelmed that they would need sedation to be treated. They absolutely should be prioritised but OP should not be.

Did you ask because you’ve usually got? 9 times out of 10 fuck me how many times are you in a&e 😂 seems to me you asked because you’ve had and it seems a bit entitled.

once I’ve asked if a room was available and that was because a relative was dying and there was someone on the ward verbally abusive, loud and kept walking in. We were given a side room when it became available to have our last moments in silence. If it wasn’t available it wouldn’t have happened.

i wouldn’t ask for a room because I’m not very well, you’re in hospital, no one is very well.

maybe a takeaway is if you’ve not been given, it’s not available don’t ask.

Some of us with very unwell children with complex medical needs unfortunately get to meet more than our fair share of unprofessional nurses, I truly wish it was a rare occurrence and I say this as a a parent with a child looked after across three trusts.

The state of nurses now that I have had personal experiences with is dire, very very dire, so awful I no longer give them the benefit of doubt.

OP you were not being entitled in any sense to politely ask a question and you didn't deserve such poor treatment from a supposed professional.
I hope the next encounter is much more positive but I won't hold my breath.