I am getting quite annoyed with a houseguest who just won't leave. This is a friend from America, who was planning to be in the UK for a few weeks this summer. I offered him a room at my partner's and my home. We initially spoke – in admittedly quite vague terms – about him staying for two weeks at the beginning of June, after which he was going off on European trips with his girlfriend. It sounded very much like I was going to see a fair bit of them but they wouldn't be here all the time.
However, while he was staying with us, his girlfriend broke up with him and their summer plans fell through. It's now been over three weeks. Although he doesn't expect to be fed and watered, and is self-sufficient, he often mooches around the house and has shown no sign of leaving. He has started doing his laundry in the washing machine. Today I asked when he was planning to go and he said that he felt guilty for imposing on us but mentioned that his summer plans were up in the air because of the break-up and didn't offer a specific date. I feel too awkward to ask him again. He is a writer whose work can be done anywhere, so I worry that this is turning into an open-ended thing and we now have not a guest but a lodger we didn't ask for.
I am trying to be as nice as I can and feel guilty turfing out a friend who is very unhappy about this break-up. He is obviously heartbroken and depressed. But I am getting increasingly vexed with his presence and that he hasn't offered to help in other ways, e.g. with chores, buying groceries etc. He didn't bring a thank-you gift which I was surprised by. There was also a couple of days where he asked if a friend could stay over, who we put in the guest-room. Again, I feel like I didn't sign up for this! There is talk of further visitors in the middle of next month (!) It's all so hideously awkward.
AIBU, and how on earth do I get him to leave without being mean? (And also creating bad blood with a friend who I do like, in spite of my increasing passive-aggression towards him.)