to wonder if a high ponytail sends a message I'm unaware of?

[AuntieWithAttitude]

I was watching a friend's kid after school and told her about a summer camp where I used to work. We often helped the kids put their hair in 'camper buns'—a messy bun right on top of their heads. She asked me to do it for her, but didn't like it, so we ended up with a super high ponytail instead. She loved it and had fun swishing it around.

When her mum saw it, she commented on how high it was and then lowered it.
I didn't really think too much of it, until today on TV a character wore a high ponytail, and other characters remarked on how high it was, saying things like 'erm, are you sure you want to wear your hair like that?'.

Am I missing something about the significance of high ponytails? I can be bad at this stuff, subtle cues and such, I'm wondering if I've caused offence to my friend somehow. She seemed really weird about it. Don't want to make the same mistake again if I've misunderstood the significance of something.

There was a poster on here with the user name "Kim Wexler's ponytail" which I always loved (username and ponytail!)

Other than that, what a fucking depressing thread this is as a demonstration of misogyny. Either as a reflection of society, or worse, actively demonstrated by posters themselves.

My 3yo came home from nursery with her hair in a Vicky Pollard pony tail as they often do the girls hair as a fun activity.

She just didn’t look anything like herself. It was weird. Plaits, space buns and high buns she still looks like herself, but I hated how it looked. It was just wrong.
Left it until bedtime despite my feelings. Sent a sweet video to friends and they straight away asked what was up with her hair.

Chavvy , Croydon face lift 🤣

"Founding father" made me smile though! Do you tie it with a small velvet ribbon in a tiny bow?

Whaaaa... ive been sending messages with my hair?

High pony or high bun here as it's so long now that even with a mid-height pony, I'm trapping it behind my back/top of my bum and giving myself a neck injury if I try to move my head quickly. Bun at bedtime (alternated with a plait) as it all has to be out of the way of the CPAP mask straps and not tie me to the bed/hurt my head/affect my sleeping position.

I often sport a high pony on day 3 of unwashed but straightened hair if I’ve gone to the gym or even just during the day - keeps the hair off my face and looks tidy 😂
Of all the things to be creating a fuss over I can’t believe a pony tail is one of them!
I also stick it in a bun for swimming - come to me for all hair faux pas crimes against fashion!!

Whaaaa...ive been sending messages with my hair?

Don't knock it.

The WiFi is shit in my hairy-a 😁

I thought Ariana Grande made them popular again with the new gens?

I had a high ponytail the other week and one of my 17 year olds walked past and said “alright jojo siwa”. 😞

I think it's called the 'Croydon facelift'.

My god some snobs on here!!

Personally for us in my family (thick, long hair) it hurts to wear a high ponytail.

Top tip from my kickboxing instructor. Anyone grabs your hair, reach up and crush their hand into your head. Don't pull, it hurts you. Crush, it hurts them. They let go, you run.

A bit classist. A high pony-tail looks attractive. One half-way down the head looks sloppy - and falls out easily.

😂

It's usually seen as a bit chavvy but they have gone to new extremes now with the slicked down ones with the baby hair too.

...not quite. In the moment I didn't think anything of it, then watched some greys today where there was a whole lot of chat about a high pony and I wondered if there was something to it. No rabbits anywhere.

Sometimes I miss things, and I find asking questions to be a good way to learn.

Maybe. As I've said I misunderstand things sometimes. Trying to learn whenever I can.

Essex? It's a Croydon Facelift actually. Leave lovely Essex out of it.

Yes very ‘Croydon facelift’. Also top knot buns are here know as ‘chav knots’ depends where you live.

I much prefer a high pony to a low one but I’d use a central parting rather than scraping it all back!

Yeah, a facelift here in Essex is an actual facelift 😁

Pebbles in the Flintstones looked cute with it

It's called a 'Croydon Facelift' and it looks common, which is why your friend didn't want her daughter sporting one. Don't think too much of it, you'll know another time.

Was only thinking about this yesterday for some reason. I've just surveyed my colleagues and this is the outcome:

Higher the ponytail the 'lower class' someone is - and the camper bun, when too high, is the worst. Lower ponytail or bun is fine apparently.

I’d much rather my child gave off ‘chav vibes’ than have a weirdly judgemental parent!