To think most people don't understand baby led weaning

[Londonforestmum]

I hear so often people say they are doing a mixture of baby led weaning and spoon feeding. I'm not saying one is better than the other, but this is 'traditional weaning', which always advised finger food from 6 months as well as purées. It's not doing a bit of both. BLW means you let your child feed themselves all the time. To say you're doing a bit of both is like saying you're a bit of a vegetarian because you eat some plant based foods alongside meat?

BLW also doesn't mean children don't use a spoon, you can use a spoon straight from the start but you just preload it for them and then let them hold it / put it in (or somewhere near lol) their mouths.

I think maybe people feel under pressure to do BLW but don't want to so they say they're doing a bit of it. There is nothing wrong with doing traditional weaning (purées and finger food) though!

Yeah, it's normal for babies to drop milk feeds.

Maybe the judgement stemmed from you correcting them on weaning their baby and the language they use 🤷‍♀️

I'm sure plenty of parents do if it is the best choice for their family. You said no mums replace milk with food. I disagree. I don't think occasionally replacing a daytime breastfeed with some greek yoghurt, cheese, scrambled egg, or other nutrient dense food instead of formula is a problem.

You seem to be spoiling for a fight but you aren't going to get it from me. Like I said, if you want to go against NHS guidance on weaning and milk, thats your decision.

Not at all wanting a fight 😐 . Just disagreeing with your comment that no mums replace milk with food under a year, they do.

Why do we have to select a side?

I found the most peaceful approach to parenting for me was to find the bits than work for me and my baby and family whilst feeling pressure to "pick a side"

Baby led weaning shouldn't be a "status" same as breastfeeding / cosleeping/ routine /no routine etc etc.

I advocate for blurring the lines and just finding what works for you.

Whilst NOT feeling pressure to pick a side*

@Londonforestmum if I'm mistaken i apologise but I think you said upthread that you only had one child and you said this morning they're 4 years old.

Why are you still worrying about how people feed their babies? Surely you've moved on by now?

They should be, the NHS says that the amount of formula they need will fall gradually after 6 months and then that they need no formula at all from 12 months.

A different extreme, but my eldest refused to drink milk of any kind from any breast/bottle/cup from 10 to 12 months. She lived to tell the tale.

Breastfeeding mums leave their bottle refusing babies at nursery from say 9-12 months all the time.

Exactly. I hate all this.

Why can't we just feed our babies? Why does it matter what we call it or how it's done?

I did what worked for my child. Which was starting a couple of weeks early cos she was desperate to try the real food (and sitting, grabbing, etc very well). Some days I spoon fed, others I left her to try putting it in her mouth herself. Some days was blitzed fruit or veg, some days blitzed whatever we were having, some days finger food. Depending on what we were having and doing.

I also did it the other way round to what OP reckons is right. Food first, then milk if she wanted it (and as much as she wanted).

Basically, I let her decide, within the realms of what was possible that day, what she wanted to eat and how much of it.

So was I doing BLW? Or traditional? Or a combination of methods? Or have I somehow stumbled onto something I should write into a book and have people argue over who is doing it right?

Who knows. Babies are born are a wide range of gestations. They can roll between 6 weeks and 8 months, walk between 9 and 18 months all within the range of ‘normal’. They can be very different weights and heights but if you start weaning ONE day before 6 months you will be berated and kicked off a BLW group 🤣

It's madness isn't it.

One of my friends almost had a breakdown because her second child didn't roll, babble or walk at identical times to her first. Same friend thought she'd be "in trouble" when her first was 2 and stopped napping for a couple of weeks.

There's so many books now and so many "rules" that no-one can possibly be a good parent. I didn't read a single book. If I was concerned or needed to learn about anything I checked the NHS site and spoke to my mum, aunt, friends with older children and the HVs. I won't say it was "easy" but it was definitely less stress than trying to follow everything perfectly.

Sounds like you were doing traditional weaning, some purées plus finger foods. Or something else. Not everything has a name.

Not about what is 'right', but there is a method defined as Baby Led Weaning, and my point was that most people don't seem to know what it means, as confirmed by this thread.

I can't believe you are still here saying this.

I started spoon feeding ds1 when he was 4 months on the advice of the health visitor but it didn't really work for us. Started finger foods at 6 months and it was so much easier so I stopped feeding him and let him get on with it. He's 18 though so BLW wasn't really a thing then.

Isn't it just not using purees?

All these silly women, getting in a flap over people trying to redefine words like 'woman' and 'female' and 'lesbian', when the REAL issue is people trying to redefine 'baby led weaning'. Oh, excuse me, 'Baby Led Weaning', as it is apparently a proper noun.

I asked you several times why it mattered what people called their method? You didn't respond to that.

But you have come to inform me what type of weaning I did.

Which suggests you just want to tell people your thoughts on things. Not that you actually care what they're doing.

No, it's not spoon feeding the purees parent to baby. You can do purees on BLW but pre-load the spoon for baby to feed themselves with.

Can you get a cute baby feeding police uniform? Maybe with a sustainable bamboo plate hat and a chicken drumstick truncheon? Then you can arrest anyone with a silicone spoon and some blended stew on it, lest the sully the purity of BLW? Can't be too careful 😉

Real baby led weaning is following what the baby wants to do. In my case that was me feeding from a spoon and some finger foods. If I hadn't fed from the spoon my baby would have screamed. That's being baby led not giving them the food and expecting them to do it themselves. I was baby led even if it didn't fit with your expectations of it.

@Laserwho my baby likes me to mush up little mouthfuls and hand feed them to him - I think he's learned that from the cat!

@Greenlittecat You seem to be spoiling for a fight but you aren't going to get it from me. Like I said, if you want to go against NHS guidance on weaning and milk, thats your decision.

How is this the advice when the recommendation for the formula amount reduces from 6m until 12m when bottles should be stopped? By your logic a baby would be given the exact same amount of milk when they have no food, to 11.5m when they have 3 meals a day and then the day they turn 12m they would have none.

Oh hello. Is there a reason you've responded to my comment 2 weeks later?

If you read my comments, you will see that I've said its normal for babies to drop milk feeds between 6-12 months.