To think most people don't understand baby led weaning

[Londonforestmum]

I hear so often people say they are doing a mixture of baby led weaning and spoon feeding. I'm not saying one is better than the other, but this is 'traditional weaning', which always advised finger food from 6 months as well as purées. It's not doing a bit of both. BLW means you let your child feed themselves all the time. To say you're doing a bit of both is like saying you're a bit of a vegetarian because you eat some plant based foods alongside meat?

BLW also doesn't mean children don't use a spoon, you can use a spoon straight from the start but you just preload it for them and then let them hold it / put it in (or somewhere near lol) their mouths.

I think maybe people feel under pressure to do BLW but don't want to so they say they're doing a bit of it. There is nothing wrong with doing traditional weaning (purées and finger food) though!

I agree. We did BLW with the odd pot of Greek yoghurt spoonfed with one of mine to replace breastmilk so I could leave him with someone longer.

You carry on doing milk as usual, before food. So it's not a case of filling them up on milk if you don't have time.

By 4 there's no difference to how a child eats regardless of how they weaned. So no I wouldn't spoon feed a 4 year old. Even puree fed babys outgrow you needing to feed them by a year old. Seems you don't understand traditional weaning. My babies had puree yet by 9 months they fed themselves.

My point is you need to leave a certain amount of time for breakfast anyway, no matter the age of the child.

Genuinely think BLW is just easier not having to make purées/ separate food / spending time spoon feeding when you could just be eating your own. As a single parent I didn't have the time or capacity to do making purées and think about separate food and if I sat their spoon feeding him I'm end up not eating myself!

Honestly it really doesn't matter 🙄

I did what would be considered 'traditional' weaning.

I remember people who did BLW going on and on at the time that BLW meant their kid would be less fussy/would eat a wider range etc.

You know what?

It was/is a load of rubbish.

My son is 10 now - eats absolutely anything and everything, huge variety, can use cutlery etc.

If I look at his class mates, you couldn't say which kids were BLW or otherwise.

No BLW is easier for YOUR child. I didn't make separate food, I blended what the rest of the family had, took all of 20 seconds. spoon feeding takes no time at all in between eating myself. It only lasted 3 months max before they eating everything independently anyway.

Genuinely think BLW is just easier not having to make purées/ separate food / spending time spoon feeding when you could just be eating your own. As a single parent I didn't have the time or capacity to do making purées and think about separate food and if I sat their spoon feeding him I'm end up not eating myself!

You can think that - and some people will agree with you and others won't.

And that's all fine.

I commented on this thread ages ago and I'm afraid I haven't had time to go back and read all the rest of it in the meantime, but it mainly seems to be people having a go at the OP for caring about terminology.

Anyway, for what it's worth, I do still pretty much agree with @Londonforestmum. I just came back to add that some people are saying it doesn't matter any more as weaning in general has moved on and it's no longer about forcing food into a reluctant baby. While this is true to some extent, I think BLW is more appealing because it's about giving autonomy to the child to choose whether and how much s/he eats. Babies and toddlers have so little autonomy in general that it's always nicer to be able to let them choose where possible. The rationale behind offering milk first in the initial stages, as OP mentions, is that a baby who expects milk when hungry is much more likely to be in the right frame of mind to explore, try and enjoy new foods when they're not quite so hungry, a feeling which at first they still associate with milk.

Also I have thought of another reason why it matters: when DS1 started at nursery at around 10 months, he'd been weaned exclusively with BLW but the room lead in his nursery did NOT know what it was or why you would do it, despite explanations. We asked them not to spoon-feed, explained that it didn't matter how much or how little he ate while at nursery since he was getting plenty of nutrition at other times, but they did still try to spoon-feed him sometimes. And this is why over two years later he still utterly refuses to eat yoghurt. Or ice-cream, which they once spooned into his mouth as a 'treat'. Anyway, all of which is to say that there are still people, including childcare professionals, who believe that they have to spoon a certain amount of the food into babies whether they want it or not, and therefore it can matter that terminology with a specific meaning is understood. I nearly pulled my child out of the nursery when this woman implied that it was a 'welfare issue' if I didn't let her forcefeed my baby fucking weetabix.

@BarnacleBeasley how BLW work at nursery? How old was your baby? And just maybe they just don’t like ice cream

There seems to be this myth that spoon feeding is force feeding. Nothing could be further from the truth. I spoon fed when my baby wanted it, opened mouth wanting it. I never once forced the spoon into their mouth. BLW put something into their mouth themselves. Spoon feeders open their mouths willingly when they want more or don't open their mouths and shake their head when they want to stop.

The BLW Facebook group was absolutely nuts. It also refused anyone who started a day before 6 months old, no matter how close the baby was born to their due date and how developed the child was. There would be 6 months old who couldn’t sit up and were very undeveloped eating because they had reached the day of 6 months. People on there were awful.

I did BLW but the whole thing put me off.

I think your son just doesn't like yoghurt or ice cream. Its not because a nursery worked fed him with a spoon 🙄🙄

If you are really fanatical about something like BLW then I’m not sure childcare (unless possibly a nanny) is the place for you. They will accommodate allergies and other health/medical but the fact that you don’t want a nursery worker to physically touch a spoon is going too far!

@crumblingschools he was pretty much weaned already, so it just works exactly the same way it works with other children. They put the food in front of the child, and he eats it if he wants, and not if he doesn't. And yes, @Greenlittecat he is a massive weirdo and just doesn't like yoghurt. But he started rejecting it around the time they were persistent in feeding him it despite him not wanting it. Sure, he might not have liked it anyway, but I was slightly pissed off that (a) a nursery worker was deliberately ignoring his care plan, and (b) he wasn't being allowed to choose what to put in his own mouth. What made me actually angry was that she implied that this was a 'welfare issue' to try and justify the fact that she'd ignored his care plan.

I thought the ice cream thing was pretty funny to be honest. But he was over one at that point and they knew him well enough that I'd have expected them to know what would happen if they suddenly popped something freezing cold in his mouth when he wasn't expecting it!

BLW is officially recommended by our NHS trust, so is not some weird fringe practice that childcare workers wouldn't have heard of. My child went to nursery a couple of mornings from around 10 months and built up to full-time at 1. I agree that it would be difficult to try and get a nursery to initiate full BLW at 6 months, but at this age, literally the only difference is that the notes would say 'don't spoonfeed' and 'we don't mind if he doesn't want to eat all the nursery meals'. They wouldn't normally expect to have to spoonfeed the ones over a year old anyway, just let them feed themselves.

The baby led aspect also means you don't reduce their milk feeds or try and replace them with food, this is led by the baby. So their is less need to feel like you need to spoon food into them incase they go hungry.

@BarnacleBeasley thanks for your polite response. I was more than a little snarky to you, so sorry! No excuse i think i just responded in haste. It's easy to forget theres an actual person with experience behind a post, so I'm very sorry!b❤️

It's probably a good thing he doesn't like icecream! My 2 year old would live off the stuff if we let him 😂

I'd be angry too at the nurserys response, but i suppose if its a full room there probably would be safegaurding issues (on their end!) If they didnt at least attempt to feed hjm

No mum replaces milk with food with a baby under 1, regardless of whether they decide to do BLW (whatever your interpretation) or spoonfeeding

I personally never did it with an aim to create a non fussy child, it just seemed the easiest and most enjoyable way of weaning. I wasn't stressing about how much he was eating or reducing milk etc, or sitting there spoon feeding rather than eating my own food.

I do think it sets the tone for mealtimes being fun and enjoyable though, rather than a battle ground involving worrying about how much people are eating and trying to control this / not trusting their appetite.

A lot of people I knew talked about cutting down milk feeds from 6 months. I also felt under pressure to do this, so the pressure/ judgement thing works both ways!

The more you talk, the more it's clear you dont really understand regular weaning.

None? I did when I needed to leave them with someone else for a day.

@S0livagant at 6 months old you would leave baby with no milk but a carrot stick when leaving them with someone else?

Not what I said. 9 months and occasionally left with other dairy as cows milk is not recommended as a drink under one and I didn't want to introduce bottles and formula.

If you go against NHS guidance that's your decision