.. in finding Fathers’ Day a little bit naff?

[iCod]

Yeah, so dads are great, loving your dad is great, giving your dad a present is great, but the whole concept of Father’s Day for me is a bit like baby showers - that’s to say a modern invention that doesn’t quite sit right with me.

I don’t do it - dad’s dead now anyway - but we even now don’t give gifts and giant chocolate bars saying DAD.

are you a Father’s Day late adopter ? Or a refusenik? A Marshall Pétain standing firm against a Father’s Day onslaught?

But Mothering Sunday historically had nothing to do with one’s own mother? It was honouring the Virgin Mary and a chance to attend your ‘mother church’. The idea that mothers are celebrated is far more modern.

All the hallmark holidays are naff.

We just do cards with a box of chocs and wine.

I do. And valentines.

Yeah, you’re right about Mothering Sunday but at least there is some tradition behind it.

I realise it’s a pretty irrelevant thing to post about 😁 but I do regard it as a bit hallmark Clinton Cards.

Yes…same here. We always celebrated Mother’s Day/Father’s day….small gift, card, nothing elaborate. Like you, it’s a trip to the cemetery for both of them now unfortunately.

So it was never something your family did op? I think that will certainly shape your opinion. Families have their own traditions, and that is okay. I grew up celebrating the day in a low key way, this is the first without my dear Dad, and it hurts. I have been to the cemetery to place flowers today, all of this love with nowhere to go. My dad was very selfless, easily pleased, and didn't expect a thing, so a day as an excuse to show appreciation for him was one I loved.

Happily, mine never did! A bar of bourneville chocolate for dad when we were children!

Are you Christian? If so I understand that. If not, I’m not sure it’s relevant? My husband’s family are and they never celebrated Father’s Day growing up asa result.

i definitely made Father’s Day cards at school, brownies etc in the 1990s so it doesn’t feel new to me. Dads are just as important as mums in my eyes.

We don’t do anything major. a card, a small token gift, and out for lunch for us. Husband’s choice of restaurant!

I am in my 50s and always did the same thing with mothers and fathers day after I became a fully fledged adult. We were never "forced" into doing anything when we were kids, or selfish teens, they waited until we were ready and wanted to.

I would take mum to the garden center and buy her a few plants/seeds for her garden as she hated cut flowers.

I would take dad a bottle of whisky and we'd have a chat. If the weather was nice he'd put on a BBQ and enjoy having us all around, if not he'd probably treat us to to takeaway.

No fuss, we never bothered with cards, just a nice day with mum or dad.

We love it. My girls (17 and 10) have each separately baked cakes for their dad, made him a card and bought him a really thoughtful gift each (books and loose leaf tea!). We’ve spent the day with both girls picking things they loved doing with him - playing piano together, going for a walk, playing on the Xbox and it’s just felt lovely to celebrate him.

The only thing I don’t like about it is that it’s painful for some people.

Of course it's naff, like all these commercialised days, eg Mothers Day, Valentine's Day etc. But, bizarrely, some people seem to like it, so I can't blame the companies for wanting to make profits from it.

It's what you make of it, the kids give DH a card they made at school. I pop down to my dad with a card and box of chocs or bottle of whiskey and we have a bit of a visit. Similar to mother's day for us really, it's a bit of something nice so I always think why not.

It doesn't have to be "naff" though, unless you want it to be. You can celebrate it in which ever way you choose surely.

Why is it naff for people to want to celebrate their Father's. A good dad has a major impact on a child's life, and we should recognize that. My dad is sadly gone now, but I loved spoiling him with a little something. My kids equally look forward to getting something special for their dad just to say thank you, we love you, and appreciate everything you do for us.

Yeah, it seems a bit daft tbh. The original concept of 'mothering Sunday' doesn't need a male equivalent.
My dearly departed dad did bugger all day to day parenting, lovely as he was. Plus he didn't even know his own birthday, never mind wanting random cards just for happening to be a man with offspring. Lol.

My dad's been dead 24 years. My kids dad (ex husband) died 3 years ago accidentally aged 53. The youngest 16 and oldest 26 wanted to go to where his ashes were scattered today so I drove them up with oldests GF and we had lunch and an ice cream. Middle child was at the cinema with her BF. It's all cool with me. I do what makes them happy in the situation. Same on his birthday, anniversary and Christmas

I have celebrated Mothers' Day for as long as I can remember. I don't remember Fathers' Day being a thing before I was an adult.

My parents divorced 30 years ago.

My parents are dead now, but when they were alive we only celebrated Mothers' Day.

My Dad was an easy person to love and celebrate every day of the year. His death was devastating to me and my siblings. He was a wonderful man. We didn't need a contrived "special" day to celebrate him, we celebrated him all year. He was in agreement that it was a load of nonsense and sufficiently confident of our love not to need or want tatty tokens.

My mother on the other hand was an abusive narcissist. We celebrated Mothers' Day partly out of habit and partly because there would be hell to pay if we didn't. She needed reassurance of our "love" on Mothers' Day, because she knew in her heart that we didn't love her and that she didn't love us.

We celebrate mother's day and father's day. Why not?! Parenting is hard work and it's nice to have a day when you are treated and feel appreciated.
My DH works so hard to support our family - we wouldn't we give him a gift and a card and let him choose what we do for the day?
I don't see father's day as being a modern, American thing like baby showers. I'm 50 this year and remember celebrating father's day in the 80s.

I just send my dad a card and phone him to have a chat on the day. There's really no need to do anything naff.

Totally naff. We have never "celebrated" it in our family.

It doesn’t need to be a commercialised thing.

I got DH a canvas of photos of our third DC to go alongside the two we have of our DDs. I was going to get it anyway but gave it to him for Father’s Day. DD1 wrote in the cards and DD2 made a picture at preschool. DS did footprint art at his baby session.

DF got some money from my DSis and I to buy clothes for his holiday. My DC gave him an updated photo mousemat.

I would do very similar for Mother’s Day. We don’t go on big days out or for meals. DH had bacon butties as a treat today and he normally organises breakfast in bed for me. It’s nice to show our appreciation for each other and from our DC whilst they’re still too young to do it themselves.

Do you feel the same about Mother's Day?
The traditional British Mothering Sunday wasn't about celebrating mothers

Regardless of the origin, isn't it best to treat your mum and your dad equally?

Despite what MN might make you believe, the world is full of hands-on dedicated dads who do an awful lot for their family, and are just a great parent as the mum - sometimes more let's be honest.

Kids celebrate each parent in turn, what's wrong with that.

Yep. Find Mothers’ Day naff too.

I was born in the 60s and yes Father's Day was a thing then. It was declared an 'official' holiday here in the same year as in the US - 1972, though it was celebrated before then too.
If you have Mother's Day you should have Fathers Day. How do you think traditions start anyway?