Should grandparents have the right to access their grandchildren if the parents don't want this?

[Life2Short4Nonsense]

Came across a discussion about the rights of grandparents to see the grandchildren if this goes against the parents' wishes.

Should grandparents be able to use the courts to get access to their grandchildren or should the parents be able to decide, as long as they are fit parents?

YABU: Grandparents should have the right to have access, unless a judge decides otherwise.

YANBU: The parents should decide, unless the parents are unfit to parent.

Please don't talk like that about my son who are you to say what he has done and what he hasn't done to try to see his daughter you don't know him so don't judge someone like that RUDE

You’re the one who told us he hasn’t done anything

He sounds like another feckless father who can’t be bothered to even try and see his daughter, but because he knows that will make him look bad he blames the mother. It’s a very common tactic with that kind of men

He hasn't been allowed to see her for 12 months like myself

As the child's father he has rights.

Has he attempted mediation and attended a MIAM

You can apply for help here

www.gov.uk/guidance/family-mediation-voucher-scheme?utm_source=CAIT&utm_campaign=mediation_vouchers#what-is-family-mediation

I've just been reading this and I'm going to be looking into it with my son thank you for the link

Can't you see that your son is problem here.

You haven't seen your granddaughter for a year, your son hasn't done a 2 second search to find out what he needs to do to see her.

You're putting more effort into insulting mum, her boyfriend and calling SS with claims they are doing all sorts (despite no contact for a year) and you're not even happy that the police amd SS have both been there and have no concerns. Then you're wondering why the mum wants nothing to do with you

But its not your son who's in the wrong?

He's quite happy to sit back and (apparently) allow weapons and drugs around his daughter but he can't be arsed doing a thing about it

Short answer. No. (Assuming no abuse from parents, Social Services involvement etc).

And you're sat behind a screen insulting me and my son when you don't know the half of it so you keep coming at me if that's what makes you feel better about yourself thanks but no thanks for your advice.
I'll take anybodies advice as long as they are not rude and disrespectful as what you are coming across

But we do know your son has taken steps to see his daughter because you yourself told us.

I am starting to see why your sons ex keeps her dc away from you.

It depends on the reasons why parents are declining contact

Every man who can't be arsed seeing his own kid needs either a Mum or partner who is cheerleading him on.

No they should not have the right.

Where is that line drawn? Aunties and Uncles? Cousins?

Of course it is up to the parents who they allow their children to be around.

I agree with this but I also see from your other points than you son has done little / nothing to try to see his daughter.

I have experienced this personally in that my brother had a brief fling. She discovered she was pregnant after it was over.

Fast forward a few years and out of persistant bitterness that my brother wanted only a co-parenting arrangement and did not want to enter into a romantic relationship with the mother - she blocked access. Sending a photo message to my mother mocking that she would never see her granddaugher again.

Difference being that instead sitting around whining my brother took her to court. It was a long process but he had his parenting rights established and a court mandated access arrangement. I also know other men in my circle of acquaintances who have done similar.

So while I empathise with you - your son is being a bit useless.

With respect, I think you’re being very harsh to that poster who is clearly upset about not being able to see her granddaughter.

Neither you nor I know the full situation except the fact that there is a little girl at the centre of this that is being used as a weapon and being cut her from her father and extended family for no discernible reason.

When splits happen, there is usually fault on both sides. Me and my ex had a rocky separation at first and we were both emotional and hurt and both said and did things that we regretted later. However, we have never EVER used our son as a pawn in our games because we were mature enough to put his needs first. He has an excellent relationship with both of us, parenting is split equally and he has great relationships with both sides of his family.

I think it’s up to the parents although personally I would always try to facilitate a relationship unless the case was particularly extreme and someone was in danger. Once the child is 18, they can make their own decisions and they will.

If they were denied access it’s because DH was not taking care of the situation.

That’s what my cousin did. Maybe people have different familial relationships but our extended family is very close.

My uncle’s ex tried to stop their eldest seeing our family. He was 14 when they split so just ignored his mom and would go up to see my nan on occasion after school (the school was round the corner from my nan’s house) and would take his bike to see his dad.

His mom gave up trying to stop it.

If Social Services have done nothing, then they believe nothing needs to be done. They have a statutory duty to investigate any report. So you’ve sent them there 3 times to look at something and they have acted on that.

If my child’s grandparent reported me to Social Services 3 times, I wouldn’t be open to them seeing my child.

Can he not afford it or he does not want to spend the money? I know legal side was rolled back but he should definitely do his research (it cost my former BiL thousands - his parents had to help to the tune of 30k so I know it can be expensive.)

It costs a couple of hundred pounds to make an application as a litigant in person, which isn’t ideal, but it’s better than doing nothing.