Would you let your child do this or am I over the top?

[KrustyBurger]

Currently on holiday in the USA. We are staying at a Marriott so not a motel type set up.

Husband asked our daughter who is 12 to run some rubbish down to the bin next to the lift, she would have to go past about 12 room doors (6 each side).

I said no, il do it as you never know who’s in the rooms and it only takes 5 seconds for someone to open the door and yank her in and you wouldn’t even know which room it is or where she is.

Husband said ok but gave me a strange glance.

Was I being over the top? Or would other parents do the same. It’s nearly 10pm at night here.

Husband's a bit of a clean freak and our bin is full hence not just leaving it.

Ha ha, this thread is wild. I have stayed in hotels in many cities and towns across the world. Not once have I seen a gun battle or an abduction. Our parents often used to book two rooms - one for them and one for us, tbat often involved walking down a corridor or even the next floor to see them. It was fine.

Clearly dodgy stuff has always gone on in hotel rooms - I remember waiting in the reception of a VERY naice Park Lane hotel for friends and there was a stream of young ladies coming in, who were, shall we say, offering a certain type of room service.

In a different country at 10pm at night is NOT the time to test 12 year olds independence. I’m a bit astonished your DH even decided she should go instead of him …100% on your side.

I'd hazard a guess that neither have 99.9% of MN users.

I’d have let them do it, but stood at the door. This sort of thing is what builds confidence and resilience.

I did see a gun battle once just outside my hotel... But that was in East Jerusalem.

And no I probably wouldn't have let a 12 year old out of my sight there.😂

Not what I said. See where I referred to his standards to maintain, cross reference with the OP’s comments that he has high standards and infer that I am saying his unnecessarily standards and pressure need to be kept to himself and not piled on his daughter.

It went from OK hotel for me to creepy hotel too. In real time. Which was my lesson not to let young girls wander the halls of any hotel anywhere. I'm with OP on this
The reason I saw it was a creepy shit hole on a dump city was from hindsight and experience not some inability to get my story straight.

You said he had a lazy arse & he should go. It was a standalone comment. Why, I'm not sure

No, they will be accompanied

Try saying this to parents of abducted children

Never take your eyes of your children.

This!

At least until 14

That is both unrealistic and unnecessary

I've lived in the US for a quarter century. While movies and the media make things look way scarier than reality, I would always err on the side of caution. My daughter's 22 and I get scared for her even now. It's not the US per say. I think the world is (and has always been) scary. I spent 15 months back in the UK recently, and to be honest, I didn't particularly feel that it was noticeably safer. After all this time living in various places around the US, I've never heard of kids walking around with knives or throwing stones at buses and cars. In fact, people where I live are more apt to say, "Hello," than they are in the UK.

What hotel was it in Bristol city centre?

Id rather not say, but it was when I was considerably younger. But to add some flavour, I had to change rooms several times because the first one hadn't been cleaned at all and was in a right state, and the second one had a splat of badly wiped up vomit on the chair. If I'd been my age now back then I would have made way more fuss and found somewhere else to stay. Boy I wished I'd read the reviews 🤮

Several Innebriated crackhead looking gentlemen also came into our private view and stayed for a while being quite the art critics too.( not even the worst things said about my work at a private view either!) Luckily they just left

My point is about all of this is that you can be really really wrong about accommodation and the safety of the area that you are staying in. I Iived in what was considered a very rough area of London at the time and thought it was sort of OK and I thought Bristol was this very nice, posh place and just naively assumed it would be entirely free of threat.
Could those guys have been guests? Could that man have worked there? Yes, but was I right in my intuition about being followed,and was he lying to gain access to my room? Also yes

I've never felt as creeped out going home at night on my own anywhere as much as I did there either which I was also really surprised about. Good thing I was sober and feeing paranoid. I'd usually have been merrily pissed as a fart after a private view.

Lots of lessons learned about situational awareness.

And the attitudes on display in this thread are why I agree about your daughter.
Woman walks into a situation she feels threatened by? No she didn't. Or , she's exaggerating
Uses her noddle to avoid situation? You did it wrong. Situation wasn't as threatening as presented.
Did you notice, no one said " good thing you didn't open the door " if I had it all would be my fault.

I could write a safety manual on dumb- dumb stupid dangerous situations I've obliviously wandered into as a young person so I think it's great that you're aware and protective.

I agree with you, until I get a feel for the place I’d not let them out my sight. People comparing being abroad to being back home where you know the place is nuts!

I wouldn't have let mine. If they were older they would be more aware of the dangers and it was late. I might have sent a couple of them but not just one.

Because you haven’t got your bearings or a sense of the place yet! If something did happen guaranteed the comments from people would be “ who the hell lets a 12 year old child out their sight and walk about a hotel themselves in a foreign country” parents can’t win

My in laws were staying in a hotel in New York and there was a murder in the hotel.

Ffs
Walking down a corridor and back that presumably has been walked to get to the room, probably back again to go to the pool or something then back is not freely letting a child wander around randomly

But I don't get my bearings or sense of the place in any place I'd never been to before. I felt like that in London. I'd still let my 12 year old walk down the corridor alone. You don't need to get your bearings in a corridor that literally leads to & from your room

Wow OTT much. I'd get my 7yo to do that. Your poor child needs to build life skills and independence.

Is the child aloud in to breath without you clstanding over her shoulder watching her like a hawk. She is 12 teach her some vital life skills safety tips and let the kid breath give her some responsibility she could get hurt Ln her own bedroom talking to God knows who on the Internet using the expensive smart phone you brought her to keep her safe