Would you let your child do this or am I over the top?

[KrustyBurger]

Currently on holiday in the USA. We are staying at a Marriott so not a motel type set up.

Husband asked our daughter who is 12 to run some rubbish down to the bin next to the lift, she would have to go past about 12 room doors (6 each side).

I said no, il do it as you never know who’s in the rooms and it only takes 5 seconds for someone to open the door and yank her in and you wouldn’t even know which room it is or where she is.

Husband said ok but gave me a strange glance.

Was I being over the top? Or would other parents do the same. It’s nearly 10pm at night here.

Husband's a bit of a clean freak and our bin is full hence not just leaving it.

Why didn’t you just stand at the door and watch her go down to the bin?

Cant believe the complacency of some of the replies on here. YES hotels in the UK are that unsafe. Young girls are assaulted on a large scale ( 1400 in Rotherham over a decade ) so dont drop your guard and keep your kids safe. !!!

And if there was anyone lurking, you are all in a hotel so if anyone didn't come back from disposing of garbage, security would have the hotel in lockdown before you could say pizza.

Part of the job of being a parent is to raise a child to be an independent, successful adult.

This is a graduated process. In 4 years time your DD maybe going to music festivals with her mates, by 18/19 they could be driving, at uni etc.

I think you are being a bit risk adverse.

Rotherham was a systematic abuse of girls

Not "grabbing a child in a well lit corridor, observed by cameras whilst their parents were clearly waiting for them in one of the 6 rooms on the floor"

Kind of hard to hide there

It's a Marriott, not some down-at-heel motel. I wouldn't hesitate to let my 12 year old granddaughter do that, though honestly I'd be more likely to put the bin outside the door for emptying (and maybe ask the clerk why it hadn't been emptied when the room was cleaned).

Yes I would absolutely let my 12 year old (or my 10 year old) do that chore - I’d probably stand at the door to watch them though unless they went together. Only because they’d likely forget which room we were in the first time. Once they’d done it once I would let them go alone the next time. A hotel is a hotel, and you’re only in the US it won’t be much different to a UK hotel.

You can think of a 'what if' for every situation, you need to risk asses. The chance of your scenario happening is low so I would have let her.

When my now 28yr old son was 7, we were staying in s hotel and he wanted some ice in his drink in our room. He knew there was an ice machine along the corridor, near the lift, so he grabbed our ice bucket and went off, on his own, to fetch some ice.
He was gone for about 7 or 8mins, even though I'd only expected it to take him 2 or 3mins, but he strolled into the room saying the machines on our floor and the one below were broken, so he'd had to go 2 floors down to fetch his ice.
As he'd returned to our room unscathed, he was clearly capable of going down 2 floors and coming back all on his own, without being accosted, at the age of 7, so allowing a 12yr old to go along the corridor to a bin, is, IMO, nothing to panic about.

I wouldn't want my daughter doing this either. You made the right call. Walking to a bin is hardly going to make a difference with promoting independence!

Op, I am like you. I don’t care what anyone says.

I had too many things happen to me as a kid. People can say you are itt or whatever but I had the bad luck to experience things people on here are saying will never happen.

And why didn’t DH do it himself?

Same here, if you were concerned (and it would not have even crossed my mind) stand at the door and keep an eye on her as she goes there and back.

Ridiculous!
God's sake, you're gonna freak her out about small stupid actions!
Get a grip

Russia, yes. America, no

I wouldn't have given it an second thought. Do you always live in such fear?

So you watch her when waits for the school bus, or goes a few soors down to her friends house?

You're being ott. It's time to start loosening the apron strings. Yiull always qpeey about her wven when shes an adult but its important not to allow those fears to rub of on her and allow her independence

Sorry, that was in response to @OhMaria2 ’s post at 18.45 discussing why being in a foreign country is relevant. She cited unfamiliar language, different laws, different attitudes towards women, etc. None of which apply in the US

PPS Having lived there for 15 yrs I don’t need a lecture on the technical differences in the legal system. But from a civilian’s perspective, if I may call it that, the system is reasonably familiar

This. And extremely unlikely as you’d know exactly where she was - in one of the rooms! If someone did that and thought they’d get away with it they’d be an idiot.

Alsi she’s 12, she should be going out and shouting her own by now. Very much old enough to walk down a hotel corridor on her own. As the pp says I wouldn’t think twice about it.

Everything a child does on their own without a parent or adult standing over them promotes confidence and independence.

I know what you mean, being in a different country, it's best to have your guard up, you just never know!!

But ur dh should've taken the bin out the clean freak that he is

😂😂

There was no way to double back. As I said , there were no staff in reception only this guys friends.
Generally bins are not on the same floor hence ehy

Why I wouldn't let my child do it.

I think this hits the nail on the head. There isn’t anything much to be gained by letting her walk along a corridor and put something in a bin.

It’s different from managing to catch a bus for a short trip , read the timetable, get off at correct stop etc in which case skills are being developed as a trade-off.

Some parents may pat themselves on the back that they are developing independence with this but essentially they just can’t be faffed to walk to the bin themselves.